Positive discipline is a
discipline
Discipline is the self-control that is gained by requiring that rules or orders be obeyed, and the ability to keep working at something that is difficult. Disciplinarians believe that such self-control is of the utmost importance and enforce a ...
model used by some schools and in
parenting
Parenting or child rearing promotes and supports the physical, cognitive, social, emotional, and educational development from infancy to adulthood. Parenting refers to the intricacies of raising a child and not exclusively for a biologica ...
that focuses on the positive points of
behavior
Behavior (American English) or behaviour (British English) is the range of actions of Individual, individuals, organisms, systems or Artificial intelligence, artificial entities in some environment. These systems can include other systems or or ...
. It is based on the idea that there are no bad children, just good and bad
behavior
Behavior (American English) or behaviour (British English) is the range of actions of Individual, individuals, organisms, systems or Artificial intelligence, artificial entities in some environment. These systems can include other systems or or ...
s. Practitioners of positive discipline believe that good behavior can be taught and reinforced while weaning bad behaviors without
hurting the child verbally or
physically. People engaging in positive discipline believe that they are not ignoring problems but dealing with the problem differently by helping the child learn how to handle situations more appropriately while remaining kind to the children themselves.
Positive behavior support (PBS) is a structured, open-ended model that many parents and schools follow. It promotes positive
decision making
In psychology, decision-making (also spelled decision making and decisionmaking) is regarded as the cognitive process resulting in the selection of a belief or a course of action among several possible alternative options. It could be either ra ...
, teaching expectations to children early, and encouraging positive behaviors.
Positive discipline is in contrast to negative discipline. Negative discipline may involve
angry
Anger, also known as wrath ( ; ) or rage, is an intense emotional state involving a strong, uncomfortable and non-cooperative response to a perceived provocation, hurt, or threat.
A person experiencing anger will often experience physical ef ...
, destructive, or
violent
Violence is characterized as the use of physical force by humans to cause harm to other living beings, or property, such as pain, injury, disablement, death, damage and destruction. The World Health Organization (WHO) defines violence a ...
responses to inappropriate behavior. In terms used by psychology research, positive discipline uses the full range of reinforcement and punishment options:
*
Positive reinforcement, such as complimenting a good effort;
*
Negative reinforcement, such as removing undesired or non-preferred stimuli;
*
Positive punishment, such as requiring a child to clean up a mess they made; and
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Negative punishment, such as removing a privilege in response to poor behavior.
However, unlike negative discipline, it does all of these things in a kind, encouraging, and firm manner. The focus of positive discipline is to establish reasonable limits and guide children to take responsibility to stay within these limits, or learn how to remedy the situation when they do not.
History
The Positive Discipline Parenting and
Classroom Management Model is based on the work of
Alfred Adler and
Rudolf Dreikurs. Adler first introduced the idea of parenting education to United States audiences in the 1920s. He advocated treating children respectfully, but also argued that spoiling and pampering children was not encouraging to them and resulted in social and behavioral problems. The classroom techniques, which were initially introduced in
Vienna
Vienna ( ; ; ) is the capital city, capital, List of largest cities in Austria, most populous city, and one of Federal states of Austria, nine federal states of Austria. It is Austria's primate city, with just over two million inhabitants. ...
in the early 1920s, were brought to the United States by Dreikurs in the late 1930s. Dreikurs and Adler referred to their approach to teaching and parenting as "democratic".
Many other authors have carried on the parenting and classroom work of Alfred Adler. Jane Nelsen wrote and self-published ''Positive Discipline'' in 1981. In 1987 ''Positive Discipline'' was picked up by
Ballantine, now a subsidiary of
Random House
Random House is an imprint and publishing group of Penguin Random House. Founded in 1927 by businessmen Bennett Cerf and Donald Klopfer as an imprint of Modern Library, it quickly overtook Modern Library as the parent imprint. Over the foll ...
. The latest edition was published by Ballantine in 2006, which includes four of the five criteria for Positive Discipline listed below. Nelsen has since added the fifth criteria. Nelsen also co-authored a series of Positive Discipline books with Lynn Lott: ''Positive Discipline for Teenagers'', ''Positive Discipline A-Z'' and ''Positive Discipline in the Classroom'' (with H. Stephen Glenn). ''Positive Discipline the First Three Years'' and ''Positive Discipline for Preschoolers'' were co-authored by Jane Nelsen, Cheryl Erwin, and Roslyn Duffy. Cheryl Erwin co-authored with Jane Nelsen ''Positive Discipline for Single Parents'' and ''Positive Discipline for Stepfamilies''.
Parenting style
Nelsen describes four basic
parenting styles modified from
Diana Baumrind's parenting style.
Positive discipline is used to teach long-term parenting—the kind and firm parenting style.
Five criteria
There are 5 criteria for effective positive discipline:
# Helps children feel a sense of connection. (Belonging and significance)
# Is mutually respectful and encouraging. (Kind and firm at the same time.)
# Is effective long-term. (Considers what the children are thinking, feeling, learning, and deciding about themselves and their world – and what to do in the future to survive or to thrive.)
# Teaches important social and
life skills. (Respect, concern for others,
problem solving
Problem solving is the process of achieving a goal by overcoming obstacles, a frequent part of most activities. Problems in need of solutions range from simple personal tasks (e.g. how to turn on an appliance) to complex issues in business an ...
, and cooperation as well as the skills to contribute to the home, school or larger community.)
# Invites children to discover how capable they are. (Encourages the constructive use of personal power and
autonomy
In developmental psychology and moral, political, and bioethical philosophy, autonomy is the capacity to make an informed, uncoerced decision. Autonomous organizations or institutions are independent or self-governing. Autonomy can also be ...
.)
Positive Discipline is distinct from positive behavior support (PBS) which is a form of child discipline often used by schools and community agencies to promote successful behavior, as PBS includes some behavioristic elements such as positive reinforcement. PBS focuses on "measuring" behaviors, replacement behaviors, a reduction of
crisis intervention, and teaching strategies for
self-control
Self-control is an aspect of inhibitory control, one of the core executive functions. Executive functions are cognitive processes that are necessary for regulating one's behavior in order to achieve specific goals.
Defined more independen ...
.
Main techniques
Creating rules
In her book entitled ''Positive Discipline'', Jane Nelsen emphasizes the importance of not only creating clear rules, but of making them fair. Any rule should be followed by the parent or teacher (as much as possible), as well as by the child. An example she gave was that of having a "black hole box" where any items left out of place around the house would be deposited for the length of one week. This applied to the belongings of the children as well as of the parents. Furthermore, the rules should be devised by the children with some direction from the authority figure, and be agreed upon in a group meeting situation where everyone has equal power and input. This makes the children responsible for following the rules which they themselves created. When consequences are necessary, they should be delivered in a kind but firm manner, preserving the trust and mutual respect between the adult and the child.
Inspiring intrinsic motivation
The idea of doing away with both positive and negative reinforcement as much as possible is suggested as a way to inspire
intrinsic motivation. Intrinsic motivation is the motivation drawn from internal sources, out of a sense of
ethics
Ethics is the philosophy, philosophical study of Morality, moral phenomena. Also called moral philosophy, it investigates Normativity, normative questions about what people ought to do or which behavior is morally right. Its main branches inclu ...
or a desire to feel good about oneself. This is in contrast with
extrinsic motivation, wherein motivation stems from a desire to avoid punishment or attain a reward. This is what Positive Discipline seeks to avoid, so that children learn to act correctly even when there will be no external reward or punishment for behavior.
Recognizing needs
In Positive Discipline theory, it is posited that when children misbehave they are displaying that a need of theirs is not being met. Children have different developmental abilities depending on their age - see
Maslow's hierarchy of needs
Maslow's hierarchy of needs is a conceptualisation of the needs (or goals) that motivate human behaviour, which was proposed by the American psychologist Abraham Maslow. According to Maslow's original formulation, there are five sets of basic n ...
. In dealing with the misbehavior, it is suggested that focusing on the unmet need rather than the behavior itself will have better results.
Understand the meaning
Naomi Aldort, author of ''Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves'', explains that inappropriate behavior can be a child's way of getting attention. They do not act out without a valid reason, as they try to do the best that they can. Once there is an understanding behind the behavior, the cause can be removed and no further emotional outbursts will come from the child.
Redirect negative behavior
A child who hears the word "No" all the time will eventually start to ignore its meaning. Katharine C. Kersey, the author of ''The 101s: A Guide to Positive Discipline'', recommends encouraging
positive behavior to replace misbehavior. Parents should be encouraged to redirect the child's behavior into something positive, for example, if a child is acting out in a supermarket, the child should be redirected into something creative or helpful such as picking out a type of fruit to buy instead of acting out.
Conscious discipline
Conscious discipline focuses on "developing discipline within children rather than applying discipline to them. The whole discipline process applies to everyone involved. Imagine a pyramid where four parts represent four stages of the discipline:
# At the base of a pyramid is understanding the brain states,
# After that comes learning your seven adult powers,
# Think of the ways how you can connect members of the family and the classroom,
# The last stage is to use the seven skills you learned to respond to situations in new ways.
Conscious discipline works with the awareness of our behavior to certain situations and encourages us to learn how to consciously manage our behavior so we can help the child to do the same. The Conscious Discipline Brain State Model has three states: Survival State (Am I safe?), Emotional State (Am I loved?), and Executive State (What can I learn from this?).
Preventive measures
Part of using positive discipline is preventing situations in which negative behaviors can arise. There are different techniques that teachers can use to prevent bad behaviors:
One technique is to see students who "misbehave" as actually demonstrating "mistaken" behavior. There are many reasons why a student may exhibit mistaken behavior, i.e. lack of knowing appropriate behavior to feeling unwanted or unaccepted. For students who simply do not know what appropriate behavior they should be exhibiting, the teacher can teach the appropriate behavior. For example, a child who is fighting over a toy in a dramatic way should be approached by a teacher who should try and create a fair solution by encouraging the child's input and talking about their problems to avoid another argument. For students who are feeling unwanted or unaccepted, a positive relationship needs to develop between the teacher and student before any form of discipline will work.
Sanctions would be less needed if students have a strong connection with the adult in charge and knew that the teacher respected them. Teachers need to know how to build these relationships. Simply telling them to demonstrate respect and connection with students is not enough for some of them, because they may also lack knowledge on how to do this.
Teachers need to view each child as an account; they must deposit positive experiences in the student before they make a withdraw from the child when discipline takes place. Teachers can make deposits through praise, special activities, fun classroom jobs, smiles and appropriate pats on the backs. Some children have never experienced positive attention. Children long for attention; if they are not receiving positive attention they will exhibit behavior that will elicit negative attention.
Teachers can recognize groups of students who would not work well together (because they are friends or do not get along well) and have them separated from the start to prevent situations which will result in negative behavior. Some teachers employ the "boy-girl-boy-girl" method of lining or circling up (which may be
sexist
Sexism is prejudice or discrimination based on one's sex or gender. Sexism can affect anyone, but primarily affects women and girls. It has been linked to gender roles and stereotypes, and may include the belief that one sex or gender is int ...
or effective, depending on your perspective) in order to keep friend groups separate and to encourage the students to make new friends. The physical arrangement of the classroom can affect classroom discipline and the effectiveness of instruction.
Another technique would be to be explicit with the rules, and consequences for breaking those rules, from the start. If students have a clear understanding of the rules, they will be more compliant when there are consequences for their behaviors later on. A series of 3 warnings is sometimes used before a harsher consequence is used (detention,
time-out, etc.), especially for smaller annoyances (for example, a student can get warnings for calling out, rather than getting an immediate detention, because a warning is usually effective enough). Harsher consequences should come without warnings for more egregious behaviors (hitting another student,
cursing, deliberately disobeying a warning, etc.). Teachers can feel justified that they have not "pulled a fast one" on students.
Students are more likely to follow the rules and expectations when they are clearly defined and defined early. Many students need to know and understand what the negative behaviors are before they end up doing one by accident.
Involving the students when making the rules and discipline plans may help prevent some students from acting out. It teaches the students responsibility and creates an awareness of what good versus bad behaviors are. It also makes the student feel obligated and motivated to follow the rules because they were involved while they were created.
Evidence
Studies of implementation of Positive Discipline techniques have shown that Positive Discipline tools do produce significant results. Research has proven that schools with a high suspension rate do not have successful academic outcomes. A study of school-wide implementation of classroom meetings in a lower-income
Sacramento, CA elementary school
A primary school (in Ireland, India, the United Kingdom, Australia, New Zealand, Trinidad and Tobago, Jamaica, South Africa, and Singapore), elementary school, or grade school (in North America and the Philippines) is a school for primary ...
over a four-year period showed that suspensions decreased (from 64 annually to 4 annually),
vandalism decreased (from 24 episodes to 2) and teachers reported improvement in classroom atmosphere, behavior, attitudes and academic performance. (Platt, 1979) A study of parent and teacher education programs directed at parents and teachers of students with "maladaptive" behavior that implemented Positive Discipline tools showed a
statistically significant improvement in the behavior of students in the program schools when compared to control schools. (Nelsen, 1979) Smaller studies examining the effects of specific Positive Discipline tools have also shown positive results. (Browning, 2000; Potter, 1999; Esquivel) Studies have repeatedly demonstrated that a student's perception of being part of the school community (being "connected" to school) decreases the incidence of socially risky behavior (such as
emotional distress and
suicidal thoughts / attempts,
cigarette
A cigarette is a narrow cylinder containing a combustible material, typically tobacco, that is rolled into Rolling paper, thin paper for smoking. The cigarette is ignited at one end, causing it to smolder; the resulting smoke is orally inhale ...
, alcohol and
marijuana
Cannabis (), commonly known as marijuana (), weed, pot, and ganja, List of slang names for cannabis, among other names, is a non-chemically uniform psychoactive drug from the ''Cannabis'' plant. Native to Central or South Asia, cannabis has ...
use; violent behavior) and increases academic performance. (Resnick et al., 1997; Battistich, 1999; Goodenow, 1993) There is also significant evidence that teaching younger students social skills has a protective effect that lasts into
adolescence
Adolescence () is a transitional stage of human Developmental biology, physical and psychological Human development (biology), development that generally occurs during the period from puberty to adulthood (typically corresponding to the age o ...
. Students that have been taught social skills are more likely to succeed in school and less likely to engage in problem behaviors. (Kellam et al., 1998; Battistich, 1999)
Programs similar to Positive Discipline have been studied and shown to be effective in changing parent behavior. In a study of Adlerian parent education classes for parents of teens, Stanley (1978) found that parents did more problem solving with their teens and were less
autocratic in decision making. Positive Discipline teaches parents the skills to be both kind and firm at the same time. Numerous studies show that teens who perceive their parents as both kind (responsive) and firm (demanding) are at lower risk for smoking, use of marijuana, use of alcohol, or being violent, and have a later onset of
sexual activity. (Aquilino, 2001; Baumrind, 1991; Jackson et al., 1998; Simons, Morton et al., 2001) Other studies have correlated the teen's perception of parenting style (kind and firm versus autocratic or permissive) with improved academic performance. (Cohen, 1997; Deslandes, 1997; Dornbusch et al., 1987; Lam, 1997)
Studies have shown that through the use of positive intervention programs "designed specifically to address the personal and social factors that place some high school students at risk of drug abuse, schools can reduce these young people's drug use and other unhealthy behaviors" (Eggert, 1995; Nicholas, 1995; Owen, 1995). Use of such programs has shown improvement in academics and a decline in drug use across the board.
Studies
Studies have shown that "kids who are at high risk of dropping out of school and abusing drugs are more isolated and
depressed and have more problems with anger", says Dr. Leona Eggert of the
University of Washington
The University of Washington (UW and informally U-Dub or U Dub) is a public research university in Seattle, Washington, United States. Founded in 1861, the University of Washington is one of the oldest universities on the West Coast of the Uni ...
in
Seattle
Seattle ( ) is the most populous city in the U.S. state of Washington and in the Pacific Northwest region of North America. With a population of 780,995 in 2024, it is the 18th-most populous city in the United States. The city is the cou ...
. "They are disconnected from school and family and are loosely connected with negative peers" (Eggert, 1995; Nicholas, 1995; Owen, 1995).
Overall implementing positive programs to deal with Positive Discipline will better the decision-making process of teens and parents, according to some researchers.
[Eggert, L.L.; Nicholas, L.J.; Owen, L.M (1995). Reconnecting Youth: A peer group approach to building life skills. Bloomington, IN: National Educational Service.]
Quail and Ward
conducted a systematic overview of research which supports
non-violent child discipline options. They found many techniques are supported by research findings. Techniques include time-in, appropriately used time-out, modeling, monitoring, feedback, appropriate praise, goal setting, promoting self-management, and promoting problem-solving skills. When combined with warm and open communication, non-violent discipline tools are effective to address a child's resistance, lack of cooperation, problem behavior, emotional dysregulation, and to teach appropriate behavior. Additional benefits include improved school engagement and academic achievement, improved self-esteem and independence, better self-regulation, and lower rates of depression, suicide, substance abuse, sexual risk behavior, conduct disorders, aggression, and crime.
See also
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School discipline
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Child discipline
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Attachment parenting
References
External links
Positive Disciplineby Dr Jane Nelson
Seven Tips for Practicing Positive Disciplineby PBS Parents
{{Parenting
School and classroom behaviour
Parenting