Mary Griffith (activist)
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Mary Griffith (October 13, 1934 – February 7, 2020) was an American
LGBT rights activist A list of notable LGBTQ social movements, LGBTQ rights activists who have worked to advance LGBTQ rights by political change, legal action or publication. Ordered by country, alphabetically. Albania * Xheni Karaj, founder of Aleanca LGBT org ...
whose son, Bobby, died by
suicide Suicide is the act of intentionally causing one's own death. Risk factors for suicide include mental disorders, physical disorders, and substance abuse. Some suicides are impulsive acts driven by stress (such as from financial or ac ...
due to her religious intolerance. Following his suicide, Griffith became a longstanding LGBT rights activist.


Bobby Griffith

Robert 'Bobby' Warren Griffith (1963–1983) was Mary Griffith's son. Bobby died when he threw himself off a bridge in
Portland, Oregon Portland ( ) is the List of cities in Oregon, most populous city in the U.S. state of Oregon, located in the Pacific Northwest region. Situated close to northwest Oregon at the confluence of the Willamette River, Willamette and Columbia River, ...
, aged 20. Bobby realised he was gay in high school, and felt substantial shame over this. Writing in his diary, Bobby said: "I can't ever let anyone find out that I’m not straight. It would be so humiliating. My friends would hate me. They might even want to beat me up. And my family? I've overheard them. They've said they hate gays, and even God hates gays, too. Gays are bad, and God sends bad boys to hell. It really scares me when they are talking about me." After his
coming out Coming out of the closet, often shortened to coming out, is a metaphor used to describe LGBTQ people's self-disclosure of their sexual orientation, romantic orientation, or gender identity. This is often framed and debated as a privacy issue, ...
, Mary sent him to counselling at the Walnut Creek Presbyterian Church, and would put bible verses around the house in an attempt to stop sinning. Bobby attempted suicide by overdosing on aspirin, and dropped out of
Las Lomas High School Las Lomas High School (LLHS) is a public high school in Walnut Creek, California, United States. It was founded in 1951 by the Acalanes Union High School District, and opened its doors in the fall of 1952 to its first graduating class. Las Lo ...
two months before his graduation. In 1983 Bobby moved to Portland with his boyfriend. Following a trip back to Walnut Creek, which Mary described Bobby as having "given up," he returned to Portland and threw himself off an over-pass, dying when his body made contact with the highway and an 18-wheel truck. A scholarship was set up in Bobby's name in 1990, administered by
GLSEN GLSEN (pronounced ''glisten''; formerly the Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network) is an American education organization working to end discrimination, harassment, and bullying based on sexual orientation, gender identity and gender expres ...
.


Activism

Following Bobby's suicide, Griffith reconsidered her opposition to homosexuality, and no longer believed that gay people would go to Hell. Griffith became involved with
PFLAG Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) is an LGBTQ advocacy organization founded and led by friends and family of LGBTQ people. PFLAG is a national organization presiding over decentralized local and regional chapters. PFLAG has nearly ...
, eventually becoming the president of a San Francisco chapter. Griffith also advocated for Gay Freedom Week, and for an increase in support for gay students in public schools. On December 6, 1995, Griffith testified before the
United States Congress The United States Congress is the legislature, legislative branch of the federal government of the United States. It is a Bicameralism, bicameral legislature, including a Lower house, lower body, the United States House of Representatives, ...
, where she asked the federal government to fund LGBT-education in schools. In 2019, Griffith wrote an article for ''
The Advocate An advocate is a professional in the field of law. The Advocate, The Advocates or Advocate may also refer to: Magazines * The Advocate (magazine), ''The Advocate'' (magazine), an LGBT magazine based in the United States * ''The Harvard Advocate' ...
'' criticising the use of
conversion therapy Conversion therapy is the pseudoscientific practice of attempting to change an individual's sexual orientation, romantic orientation, gender identity, or gender expression to align with heterosexual and cisgender norms. Methods that have ...
and asking religious conservatives to reconsider their position on homosexuality.


''Prayers for Bobby''

Griffith's story was adapted into a book written by Leroy F. Aarons and published by
HarperCollins HarperCollins Publishers LLC is a British–American publishing company that is considered to be one of the "Big Five (publishers), Big Five" English-language publishers, along with Penguin Random House, Hachette Book Group USA, Hachette, Macmi ...
in 1995, titled '' Prayers for Bobby: A Mother's Coming to Terms with the Suicide of Her Gay Son''. In 2009, a film, titled ''
Prayers for Bobby ''Prayers for Bobby'' is a televised drama film that premiered on the Lifetime network on January 24, 2009. The film is based on the book of the same name by Leroy F. Aarons, which is itself based on the true story of the life and legacy of B ...
'', was produced. Griffith was played by
Sigourney Weaver Susan Alexandra ( ; born October 8, 1949), better known by her stage name Sigourney Weaver, is an American actress. Prolific in film since the late 1970s, she is known for her pioneering portrayals of action heroines in Blockbuster (entertainme ...
. In response to the film, Griffith noted that "the movie comes very close to what happened."


Personal life

Griffith was born to a highly devout
Christian A Christian () is a person who follows or adheres to Christianity, a Monotheism, monotheistic Abrahamic religion based on the life and teachings of Jesus in Christianity, Jesus Christ. Christians form the largest religious community in the wo ...
family, and after a minor incident with the police when she was a teenager, she became a
fundamentalist Fundamentalism is a tendency among certain groups and individuals that are characterized by the application of a strict literal interpretation to scriptures, dogmas, or ideologies, along with a strong belief in the importance of distinguishin ...
. Later she largely abandoned her fundamentalist perspective. Describing her religious beliefs in 2009, she said that "It's humiliating just to go through the Bible and see the fairy tales I believed, like that business about mixing fabrics." Griffith died in 2020, aged 85.


References

{{DEFAULTSORT:Griffith, Mary 1934 births 2020 deaths American LGBTQ rights activists