Ed Ayres (musician)
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Ed Le Brocq, previously known as Emma, Ed or Eddie Ayres (), (born 1967) is a musician, music teacher, radio presenter and writer. He is notable for his work on the Australian
ABC Classic ABC Classic, formerly ABC-FM (also ABC Fine Music), and then ABC Classic FM, is an Australian classical music radio station available in Australia and internationally. Its website features classical music news, features and listening guides. I ...
radio station, as well as for his numerous charitable efforts and memoirs about his transition as a
transgender man A trans man or transgender man is a man who was assigned female at birth. Trans men have a male gender identity, and many trans men undergo medical and social transition to alter their appearance in a way that aligns with their gender identit ...
.


Early life and education

Born in
Dover Dover ( ) is a town and major ferry port in Kent, southeast England. It faces France across the Strait of Dover, the narrowest part of the English Channel at from Cap Gris Nez in France. It lies southeast of Canterbury and east of Maidstone. ...
in 1967, Ayres grew up in
Shrewsbury Shrewsbury ( , ) is a market town and civil parish in Shropshire (district), Shropshire, England. It is sited on the River Severn, northwest of Wolverhampton, west of Telford, southeast of Wrexham and north of Hereford. At the 2021 United ...
, in the county of
Shropshire Shropshire (; abbreviated SalopAlso used officially as the name of the county from 1974–1980. The demonym for inhabitants of the county "Salopian" derives from this name.) is a Ceremonial counties of England, ceremonial county in the West M ...
, England. He was two when his parents separated, leaving his mother, Anna, to bring up four children aged within four and a half years of one another, living in a small house. He has described one of his siblings as a difficult child, who ran away from home many times, and there were frequent family fights. He started to play the
violin The violin, sometimes referred to as a fiddle, is a wooden chordophone, and is the smallest, and thus highest-pitched instrument (soprano) in regular use in the violin family. Smaller violin-type instruments exist, including the violino picc ...
when he was eight years old, switching to
viola The viola ( , () ) is a string instrument of the violin family, and is usually bowed when played. Violas are slightly larger than violins, and have a lower and deeper sound. Since the 18th century, it has been the middle or alto voice of the ...
when he was twelve. However the
cello The violoncello ( , ), commonly abbreviated as cello ( ), is a middle pitched bowed (sometimes pizzicato, plucked and occasionally col legno, hit) string instrument of the violin family. Its four strings are usually intonation (music), tuned i ...
was his first love. Miserable in early adolescence, Ayres
self-harm Self-harm refers to intentional behaviors that cause harm to oneself. This is most commonly regarded as direct injury of one's own skin tissues, usually without suicidal intention. Other terms such as cutting, self-abuse, self-injury, and s ...
ed. He graduated from the
Royal Northern College of Music The Royal Northern College of Music (RNCM) is a conservatoire located in Manchester, England. It is one of four conservatoires associated with the Associated Board of the Royal Schools of Music. In addition to being a centre of music education ...
in
Manchester Manchester () is a city and the metropolitan borough of Greater Manchester, England. It had an estimated population of in . Greater Manchester is the third-most populous metropolitan area in the United Kingdom, with a population of 2.92&nbs ...
and did further studies at the
Hochschule der Künste The Universität der Künste Berlin (UdK; also known in English as the Berlin University of the Arts), situated in Berlin, Germany, is the second largest art school in Europe. It is a public art and design school, and one of the four research uni ...
in Berlin, where he received a DAAD (
German Academic Exchange Service The German Academic Exchange Service (DAAD; ), founded in 1925, is a joint organization of German universities and student bodies to foster their international relations. Since 1 January 2020, the president has been Joybrato Mukherjee. Organisa ...
) scholarship; at the
Royal Academy The Royal Academy of Arts (RA) is an art institution based in Burlington House in Piccadilly London, England. Founded in 1768, it has a unique position as an independent, privately funded institution led by eminent artists and architects. Its ...
in London, with the assistance of a
Countess of Munster Musical Trust The Countess of Munster Musical Trust is a charity based in Godalming, Surrey, England, that provides scholarships, prizes and loans to support young musicians in the United Kingdom. History The trust was founded in 1958 by Hilary Wilson (9 March ...
scholarship; and at the
Victorian College of the Arts The Victorian College of the Arts (VCA) is the arts school at the University of Melbourne in Australia. It is part of the university's Faculty of Fine Arts and Music (FFAM). It is located near the Melbourne city centre on the Southbank campus ...
in
Melbourne Melbourne ( , ; Boonwurrung language, Boonwurrung/ or ) is the List of Australian capital cities, capital and List of cities in Australia by population, most populous city of the States and territories of Australia, Australian state of Victori ...
.


Career

Ayres was a professional
viola The viola ( , () ) is a string instrument of the violin family, and is usually bowed when played. Violas are slightly larger than violins, and have a lower and deeper sound. Since the 18th century, it has been the middle or alto voice of the ...
player for 12 years, including eight years performing with the
Hong Kong Philharmonic Orchestra The Hong Kong Philharmonic Orchestra () is a symphony orchestra based in Hong Kong. Colloquially referred to as the HKPO or HKPhil (), the orchestra was first established in 1947 as an amateur orchestra under the name Sino-British Orchestra (), ...
after moving there in 1992. In 2001, he began presenting the classical music breakfast show on the
Radio Television Hong Kong Radio Television Hong Kong (RTHK) is the public broadcasting service of Hong Kong. GOW, the predecessor to RTHK, was established in 1928 as the first broadcasting service in Hong Kong. As a government department under the Commerce and Economic ...
(RTHK) station in Hong Kong. Ayres moved from Hong Kong to Australia in February 2003, living in Melbourne and cycling to work each day. From 4 February 2008, Ayres began presenting the ''Classic Breakfast'' program on
ABC Classic FM ABC Classic, formerly ABC-FM (also ABC Fine Music), and then ABC Classic FM, is an Australian classical music radio station available in Australia and internationally. Its website features classical music news, features and listening guides. I ...
. In the same year, he taught at the
Melbourne Girls Grammar School Melbourne Girls Grammar School (commonly called MGGS and formally known as MCEGGSFalk, B. (2012Australian Dictionary of Biography: Dorothy Jean Ross. M.U.P. Retrieved 7 August 2018), is an independent, Anglican, day and boarding school for girls, ...
and taught
cello The violoncello ( , ), commonly abbreviated as cello ( ), is a middle pitched bowed (sometimes pizzicato, plucked and occasionally col legno, hit) string instrument of the violin family. Its four strings are usually intonation (music), tuned i ...
to a wide range of private students. In 2012 Ayres appeared on ''Big Ideas Talking'' with Andrew Schultz, composer and head of the school of Arts and the Media at
UNSW The University of New South Wales (UNSW) is a public university, public research university based in Sydney, New South Wales, Australia. It was established in 1949. The university comprises seven faculties, through which it offers bachelor's, ...
, and music psychologist Emery Schubert, on insights into composition and emotional responses to music. By 2014, he was living in the inner-west suburb of
Glebe A glebe (, also known as church furlong, rectory manor or parson's close(s)) is an area of land within an ecclesiastical parish used to support a parish priest. The land may be owned by the church, or its profits may be reserved to the church. ...
with a new partner in
Sydney Sydney is the capital city of the States and territories of Australia, state of New South Wales and the List of cities in Australia by population, most populous city in Australia. Located on Australia's east coast, the metropolis surrounds Syd ...
. His memoir, ''Cadence: Travels with music - a memoir'', was published in May 2014. On 30 June 2014, Ayres announced that he would be leaving at the end of the year. In July 2014, he appeared on the Musica Viva channel with an interview to camera: ''Chamber Music & Me''. In October 2014, ABC FM radio's ''Classic Breakfast'' website announced that he had "chosen to hang up isheadphones and move on to new adventures". after
Ellen Fanning Ellen Mary Fanning (born 8 September 1967) is an Australian journalist. Fanning currently hosts the Drive program on ABC Radio Brisbane. She was previously host of '' The Drum'' on ABC TV and ABC News Channel and the Nine Network's ''Sunda ...
had been announced in September 2014 as temporary successor. Ayres later revealed that the real reason for his departure was that he was suffering from
major depression Major depressive disorder (MDD), also known as clinical depression, is a mental disorder characterized by at least two weeks of pervasive low mood, low self-esteem, and loss of interest or pleasure in normally enjoyable activities. Intro ...
at the time. Lunchbox/Soapbox at the
Wheeler Centre The Wheeler Centre, originally Centre of Books, Writing and Ideas, is a literary and publishing centre founded as part of Melbourne's bid to be a Unesco Creative City of Literature, which designation it earned in 2008. It is named after its pa ...
in Melbourne in January 2015 featured Ayres presenting ''The Viola: A big violin, a small cello, or just a joke''? Later that year he moved to
Kabul Kabul is the capital and largest city of Afghanistan. Located in the eastern half of the country, it is also a municipality, forming part of the Kabul Province. The city is divided for administration into #Districts, 22 municipal districts. A ...
, where he began teaching
violin The violin, sometimes referred to as a fiddle, is a wooden chordophone, and is the smallest, and thus highest-pitched instrument (soprano) in regular use in the violin family. Smaller violin-type instruments exist, including the violino picc ...
, viola and cello at the
Afghanistan National Institute of Music The Afghanistan National Institute of Music (ANIM) is an exiled school of music that was formerly operated in Kabul, Afghanistan until the recapturing of Kabul by the Taliban and is currently based in Braga, Portugal. It was founded in 2010 by t ...
. In 2016 he gave an extended interview on '' The Weekly'' with
Charlie Pickering Charlie Pickering (born 29 August 1977) is an Australian comedian, television and radio presenter, author and producer. Pickering currently hosts ''The Weekly with Charlie Pickering'', a weekly news satire television show on the ABC (Australia ...
. He
came out Coming out of the closet, often shortened to coming out, is a metaphor used to describe LGBTQ people's self-disclosure of their sexual orientation, romantic orientation, or gender identity. This is often framed and debated as a privacy issue, ...
as transgender in that year. In 2017, Ayres moved back to Australia, to
Brisbane Brisbane ( ; ) is the List of Australian capital cities, capital and largest city of the States and territories of Australia, state of Queensland and the list of cities in Australia by population, third-most populous city in Australia, with a ...
, where he taught cello, violin and viola. In October he spoke with
Jon Faine Jonathan Eric Faine (born 21 September 1956) is an Australian former radio presenter who hosted the morning program on ABC Radio Melbourne in Melbourne. Faine is recognised as a prominent and influential member of the Australian Jewish communi ...
at an event at the Wheeler Centre about his music and personal life and his 2017 book ''Danger Music''. From December 2017, when it was created as ''The Art Hub'', until mid-January 2020 (after renaming as '' The Art Show''), Ayres presented an hour-long program on
Radio National ABC Radio National, more commonly known as Radio National or simply RN, is an Australian nationwide public service radio network run by the Australian Broadcasting Corporation (ABC). From 1947 until 1985, the network was known as ABC Radio 2. ...
about art. Ayres had developed an interest in art after learning about it from his brother, Tim, an artist. He appeared at both
Adelaide Writers' Week Adelaide Writers' Week, known locally as Writers' Week or WW, is a large and mostly free literary festival held annually in Adelaide, the capital of South Australia. It forms part of the Adelaide Festival of Arts, where attendees meet, listen, an ...
and
Sydney Writers' Festival The Sydney Writers' Festival (SWF) is an annual literary festival held in Sydney in May, with the inaugural festival taking place in 1997. The 2020 event was cancelled due to the COVID-19 pandemic in Australia. History The festival began in Jan ...
in 2018. In 2019, Ayres returned to ABC Classic to present ''Weekend Breakfast''.


Other roles

Ayres has been involved in a number of charitable efforts. In 2000, he raised money by making a twelve-month cycling trip from
Shropshire Shropshire (; abbreviated SalopAlso used officially as the name of the county from 1974–1980. The demonym for inhabitants of the county "Salopian" derives from this name.) is a Ceremonial counties of England, ceremonial county in the West M ...
in England to Hong Kong. In 2011 he busked in
Hyde Park, Sydney Hyde Park, Sydney, is an urban park, of , located in the Sydney central business district, central business district of Sydney, in the City of Sydney local government area of New South Wales, Australia. It is the oldest public parkland in Aust ...
, to raise money for the victims of the
floods in Queensland A flood is an overflow of water ( or rarely other fluids) that submerges land that is usually dry. In the sense of "flowing water", the word may also be applied to the inflow of the tide. Floods are of significant concern in agriculture, civi ...
. In 2017 Ayres narrated "Not Quite the Night Before Christmas" as part of a live performance with
a capella Music performed a cappella ( , , ; ), less commonly spelled acapella in English, is music performed by a singer or a singing group without instrumental accompaniment. The term ''a cappella'' was originally intended to differentiate between Rena ...
group
The Idea of North The Idea of North are an Australian a cappella vocal ensemble founded in Canberra in 1993, by Nick Begbie (tenor), Meg Corson (alto), Trish Delaney-Brown (soprano) and Andrew Piper (bass). Still active in 2024, but touring less frequently sin ...
and the
Melbourne Symphony Orchestra The Melbourne Symphony Orchestra (MSO) is an Australian orchestra based in Melbourne. The MSO is resident at Hamer Hall. The MSO has its own choir, the MSO Chorus, following integration with the Melbourne Chorale in 2008. The MSO relies on fun ...
, which was made into an album called ''A World of Christmas''. He was on the board of Green Music Australia, retiring in 2018. Ayres has been involved in the Melbourne-based charity Hush Foundation, which uses the arts to improve young patients' lives in hospitals.


Personal life and family

Ayres has a brother,
Tim Ayres Timothy Ayres (born 18 December 1973) is an Australian politician and trade unionist who was elected as a Senator for New South Wales at the 2019 federal election. He is a member of the Australian Labor Party and was previously a trade union o ...
, an artist who lives and works in the Netherlands, and whose work is held in the
Stedelijk Museum The Stedelijk Museum Amsterdam (; Municipal Museum Amsterdam), colloquially known as the Stedelijk, is a museum for modern art, contemporary art, and design located in Amsterdam, Netherlands.
in
Amsterdam Amsterdam ( , ; ; ) is the capital of the Netherlands, capital and Municipalities of the Netherlands, largest city of the Kingdom of the Netherlands. It has a population of 933,680 in June 2024 within the city proper, 1,457,018 in the City Re ...
, the
New York Public Library The New York Public Library (NYPL) is a public library system in New York City. With nearly 53 million items and 92 locations, the New York Public Library is the second-largest public library in the United States behind the Library of Congress a ...
, and by members of the Dutch royal family. He also has two sisters, Liz and Penny. Ayres received
Australian citizenship The primary law governing nationality of Australia is the Australian Citizenship Act 2007, which came into force on 1 July 2007 and is applicable in all states and territories of Australia. All persons born in Australia before 20 August 1986 ...
in 2010. A friend of Ayres, Carol "Charlie" Le Brocq, offered assistance and support during his gender transition in 2016, and they subsequently fell in love and became partners. They married in February 2022, and Ed took her surname. Artist Jaq Grantford asked Le Brocq's permission to paint a portrait of him, and he requested to be represented as a
centaur A centaur ( ; ; ), occasionally hippocentaur, also called Ixionidae (), is a creature from Greek mythology with the upper body of a human and the lower body and legs of a horse that was said to live in the mountains of Thessaly. In one version o ...
. This related to the story of
Chiron In Greek mythology, Chiron ( ; also Cheiron or Kheiron; ) was held to be the superlative centaur amongst his brethren since he was called the "wisest and justest of all the centaurs". Biography Chiron was notable throughout Greek mythology for ...
in Greek mythology, who was a teacher and mentor to many Greek heroes, and spurned violence in favour of wisdom and intellect. It is also a personal nickname used by his wife, which symbolises his "acceptance of his true self". The painting, called ''I Am a Centaur'', was selected as a 2024 Archibald Prize finalist. One of Grantford's children is transgender, so she saw the painting as a way to support her child and the transgender community as well.


Gender transition

Ayres wrote about gender in his 2014 memoir, ''Cadence: Travels with music - a memoir'', narrating his experiences of being thought of as a man during his bicycle travels in countries such as Pakistan. In an interview published in the ''
Sydney Morning Herald ''The Sydney Morning Herald'' (''SMH'') is a daily tabloid newspaper published in Sydney, Australia, and owned by Nine Entertainment. Founded in 1831 as the ''Sydney Herald'', the ''Herald'' is the oldest continuously published newspaper in ...
'' in 2016, Ayres
came out Coming out of the closet, often shortened to coming out, is a metaphor used to describe LGBTQ people's self-disclosure of their sexual orientation, romantic orientation, or gender identity. This is often framed and debated as a privacy issue, ...
as a
transgender A transgender (often shortened to trans) person has a gender identity different from that typically associated with the sex they were sex assignment, assigned at birth. The opposite of ''transgender'' is ''cisgender'', which describes perso ...
man. He said that he had first realised he was a man during a cycling trip in
Pakistan Pakistan, officially the Islamic Republic of Pakistan, is a country in South Asia. It is the List of countries and dependencies by population, fifth-most populous country, with a population of over 241.5 million, having the Islam by country# ...
in 2013 in a "total beam of light" moment one evening while watching the film '' Boys Don't Cry''. He said, "I've waited a long time to do this. I suppressed this for so long, now I feel I can't wait". He transitioned just before his 50th birthday. In a 2018 interview, Ayres said "...there's no medical proof of this, really, but I believe that I am male and that my body doesn't represent what I see myself as being. I have always felt in some sort of corner of my being that something wasn't quite right... Realising you're transgender, for me, was utterly, utterly devastating". He had thought that as a female he was a lesbian, but his partners at the time had refused to stay with him if he transitioned.


Names

Le Brocq was born Emma Ayres. He styled himself Eddie Ayres after his transition but more recently, and as author of his 2021 book ''Whole Notes'', was known as Ed Ayres. His full name is Eadric, taken from
Eadric the Wild Eadric ''the Wild'' (or Eadric ''Silvaticus''), also known as Wild Edric, Eadric ''Cild'' (or ''Child'') and Edric ''the Forester'', was an Anglo-Saxon magnate of Shropshire and Herefordshire who led English resistance to the Norman Conquest, acti ...
, a resistance fighter in Shropshire after the
Norman Conquest The Norman Conquest (or the Conquest) was the 11th-century invasion and occupation of England by an army made up of thousands of Normans, Norman, French people, French, Flemish people, Flemish, and Bretons, Breton troops, all led by the Du ...
in
1066 Events Worldwide * March 20 – Halley's Comet reaches perihelion. Its appearance is subsequently recorded in the Bayeux Tapestry. Asia * ''unknown dates'' **Chinese imperial official Sima Guang presents the emperor with an eight-v ...
. He changed his name to Ed Le Brocq when he married in 2022.


Books


''Cadence: Travels with music – a memoir''

''Cadence'' (2014) is an autobiographical story of Ayres's life and thoughts during his bicycle travels. It is described in
GoodReads Goodreads is an American social cataloging website and a subsidiary of Amazon that allows individuals to search its database of books, annotations, quotes, and reviews. Users can sign up and register books to generate library catalogs and readi ...
as intercontinental cycling adventure, music guide, "provocative, intelligent, surprising and funny". It tells the story of Ayres, then named Emma, cycling his way from England to Hong Kong with a violin strapped to his back. It is also a journey through the music that inspired his own musical works. It was during this time that Ayres realised that he was a transgender man, while watching the film '' Boys Don't Cry''.


''Danger Music''

''Danger Music'' (2017) is an autobiographical account dealing with Ayres's experiences and feelings during his time from early 2015 at Afghanistan's National Institute of Music in
Kabul Kabul is the capital and largest city of Afghanistan. Located in the eastern half of the country, it is also a municipality, forming part of the Kabul Province. The city is divided for administration into #Districts, 22 municipal districts. A ...
, leading up to his decision to fully transition to male gender. By early 2016 at the age of 49, he had received a
double mastectomy Mastectomy is the medical term for the surgical removal of one or both breasts, partially or completely. A mastectomy is usually carried out to treat breast cancer. In some cases, women believed to be at high risk of breast cancer choose to have ...
. In his last three months in Afghanistan, after he returned from his mastectomy, he began living as a man, riding motorcycles around Kabul wearing blue jeans and a black leather jacket over a white T-shirt. The book ends back in Australia with Eddie's first testosterone injection to initiate the chemical change to a man. ''Danger Music'' was launched in Brisbane at the Avid Reader bookshop in West End on 27 September 2017. On 17 November he appeared at Avid Reader's first Summer Reading Guide launch of the 2017 season with author Robert Whyte in presentations followed by a joint discussion. Ayres wrote about ''Danger Music'' for ''The Guardian''; "Moving to a war zone was better than living with what was in my head" appeared on Sunday 24 September 2017, essentially an excerpt from the book (p. 5).


''Sonam and the Silence''

''Sonam and the Silence'' (2018) is a children's book, inspired by Ayres' experiences while teaching music in Afghanistan. It is about a young girl living in Afghanistan when ruled by the
Taliban , leader1_title = Supreme Leader of Afghanistan, Supreme leaders , leader1_name = {{indented plainlist, * Mullah Omar{{Natural Causes{{nbsp(1994–2013) * Akhtar Mansour{{Assassinated (2015–2016) * Hibatullah Akhundzada (2016–present) ...
, who forbade music, and her discovery of the power of music. Illustrated by Iranian-Australian artist Ronak Taher, it was shortlisted for the 2019
Prime Minister's Literary Award The Australian Prime Minister's Literary Awards (PMLA) were announced at the end of 2007 by the incoming First Rudd ministry following the 2007 Australian federal election, 2007 election. They are administered by the Minister for the Arts (Aust ...
.


''Whole Notes''

''Whole Notes'' (2021) is a follow-up to ''Danger Music'', and about music and identity. One critic described it as "...a compendious love letter to music, the viola (Ayres’ first love) and musical education". In it, he describes how he found the bravery to transition through the power of music. ''Whole Notes'' was shortlisted for the 2022 nonfiction
Age Book of the Year ''The Age'' Book of the Year Awards were annual literary awards presented by Melbourne's ''The Age'' newspaper. The awards were first presented in 1974. After 1998, they were presented as part of the Melbourne Writers Festival Melbourne Writer ...
.


References


External links


Ed Le Brocq
on ABC classic website
Australian World Orchestra Live on ABC Classic FM
(26 August 2011): {{DEFAULTSORT:Lebrocq, Ed 1967 births 20th-century English male musicians 21st-century English male musicians 20th-century English male writers 21st-century English male writers 20th-century English LGBTQ people 21st-century English LGBTQ people 20th-century Australian male musicians 21st-century Australian male musicians 20th-century Australian male writers 21st-century Australian male writers 20th-century Australian LGBTQ people 21st-century Australian LGBTQ people 21st-century memoirists 20th-century cellists 21st-century cellists 20th-century violists 21st-century violists ABC radio (Australia) journalists and presenters Alumni of the Royal Northern College of Music Australian classical cellists Australian classical violists Australian memoirists Australian radio presenters Australian transgender men Australian transgender musicians Australian transgender writers Berlin University of the Arts alumni British expatriates in Afghanistan Classical music radio presenters Cycling writers English classical cellists English classical violists English male cyclists British male cyclists English radio presenters English transgender men English transgender musicians English transgender writers English LGBTQ broadcasters LGBTQ classical musicians LGBTQ cyclists Living people Musicians from Kent People from Dover, Kent Touring cyclists LGBTQ media personalities Transgender male musicians Transgender male writers Transgender memoirists Transgender academics British media personalities British LGBTQ sportsmen