Steve Altes (born November 13, 1962) is an American writer and former aerospace engineer. He writes humorous essays about his misadventures.
Early life
Altes was born on November 13, 1962, in
Syracuse, New York
Syracuse ( ) is a City (New York), city in and the county seat of Onondaga County, New York, United States. With a population of 148,620 and a Syracuse metropolitan area, metropolitan area of 662,057, it is the fifth-most populated city and 13 ...
. He graduated from
Fayetteville-Manlius High School in
Manlius in 1980. In high school, Altes once ran a track meet in clown make-up.
In 2000, when Altes was inducted into the Fayetteville-Manlius Hall of Distinction as one of the high school's "notable alumni", he acknowledged the dichotomy in his career segue from engineering to entertainment, saying, "I owe a tremendous debt to those dedicated teachers for the serious half of my career. For the silly half, I’d like to thank all the class clowns."
Engineering
Altes holds three degrees from the
Massachusetts Institute of Technology
The Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) is a Private university, private research university in Cambridge, Massachusetts, United States. Established in 1861, MIT has played a significant role in the development of many areas of moder ...
(MIT):
S.B., Aeronautics and Astronautics, 1984;
S.M., Aeronautics and Astronautics, 1986; and
S.M., Technology and Policy, 1986.
In 1982, Altes was part of the MIT team that set a world land-speed record for a human-powered vehicle using a five-person, forty-foot-long "bicycle".
His master's thesis, "The
Aerospace Plane: Technological Feasibility and Policy Implications", was reviewed by
James Fallows
James Mackenzie Fallows (born August 2, 1949) is an American writer and journalist. He is a former national correspondent for ''The Atlantic.'' His work has also appeared in ''Slate (magazine), Slate'', ''The New York Times Magazine'', ''The New Y ...
in ''
The New York Review of Books
''The New York Review of Books'' (or ''NYREV'' or ''NYRB'') is a semi-monthly magazine with articles on literature, culture, economics, science and current affairs. Published in New York City, it is inspired by the idea that the discussion of ...
'' in 1986.
After college, Altes worked as a space policy analyst for the Congressional
Office of Technology Assessment.
He left Congress for a position as program control manager for the
Pegasus air-launched space booster at
Orbital Sciences Corporation
Orbital Sciences Corporation (commonly referred to as Orbital) was an American company specializing in the design, manufacture, and launch of small- and medium- class space and launch vehicle systems for commercial, military and other governmen ...
. In 1991, Altes was part of the Orbital Sciences team that was awarded the
National Medal of Technology
The National Medal of Technology and Innovation (formerly the National Medal of Technology) is an honor granted by the president of the United States to American inventors and innovators who have made significant contributions to the development ...
(the United States' highest award for technological achievement) by President
George H. W. Bush
George Herbert Walker BushBefore the outcome of the 2000 United States presidential election, he was usually referred to simply as "George Bush" but became more commonly known as "George H. W. Bush", "Bush Senior," "Bush 41," and even "Bush th ...
for developing Pegasus. He is a co-recipient of the 1990
Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum
The National Air and Space Museum (NASM) of the Smithsonian Institution is a museum in Washington, D.C., in the United States, dedicated to history of aviation, human flight and space exploration.
Established in 1946 as the National Air Museum, ...
Trophy for Current Achievement in Aerospace.
Due to his varied endeavors in the fields of engineering and entertainment, Altes is sometimes listed as one of MIT's more "notable alumni".
Entertainment
In the mid-1990s, Altes left engineering for a career in entertainment and writing.
Essays
Altes has written a series of first-person participatory adventure essays about experiences such as:
* becoming an ordained minister of the
Universal Life Church
The Universal Life Church (ULC) is an American non-denominational religious organization founded in 1962 by Kirby J. Hensley,James R. Lewis, The Encyclopedia of Cults, Sects, and New Religions' (2001), p. 769-70.U.S. Department of the Army, ' ...
* working as a
hand model
*
standing in for
Brad Pitt
William Bradley Pitt (born December 18, 1963) is an American actor and film producer. In a Brad Pitt filmography, film career spanning more than thirty years, Pitt has received list of awards and nominations received by Brad Pitt, numerous a ...
on the movie ''
The Devil's Own
''The Devil's Own'' is a 1997 American action thriller film directed by Alan J. Pakula, starring Harrison Ford and Brad Pitt, with Rubén Blades, Natascha McElhone, Julia Stiles, Margaret Colin, Treat Williams, and George Hearn in supp ...
''
* being chosen to model for the
Just for Men hair color box
* having his first book published
* working as a "bank robber" at the
FBI training academy
* answering phones in the
Arkansas Governor's Mansion for
President-elect
An ''officer-elect'' is a person who has been elected to a position but has not yet been installed. Notably, a president who has been elected but not yet installed would be referred to as a ''president-elect'' (e.g. president-elect of the Un ...
Bill Clinton
William Jefferson Clinton (né Blythe III; born August 19, 1946) is an American politician and lawyer who was the 42nd president of the United States from 1993 to 2001. A member of the Democratic Party (United States), Democratic Party, ...
* and being hired and fired by the
CIA
The Central Intelligence Agency (CIA; ) is a civilian foreign intelligence service of the federal government of the United States tasked with advancing national security through collecting and analyzing intelligence from around the world and ...
in one day.
These essays have appeared in magazines and newspapers like ''
Salon
Salon may refer to:
Common meanings
* Beauty salon
A beauty salon or beauty parlor is an establishment that provides Cosmetics, cosmetic treatments for people. Other variations of this type of business include hair salons, spas, day spas, ...
'', ''
The Washington Post
''The Washington Post'', locally known as ''The'' ''Post'' and, informally, ''WaPo'' or ''WP'', is an American daily newspaper published in Washington, D.C., the national capital. It is the most widely circulated newspaper in the Washington m ...
'',
the ''
Los Angeles Times
The ''Los Angeles Times'' is an American Newspaper#Daily, daily newspaper that began publishing in Los Angeles, California, in 1881. Based in the Greater Los Angeles city of El Segundo, California, El Segundo since 2018, it is the List of new ...
'',
''
The Christian Science Monitor
''The Christian Science Monitor'' (''CSM''), commonly known as ''The Monitor'', is a nonprofit news organization that publishes daily articles both in Electronic publishing, electronic format and a weekly print edition. It was founded in 1908 ...
'', ''
Capital Style'',
''
The Writer'',
''
Urban Male Magazine'', ''
Funny Times'' and ''
P.O.V.''
Books
In 1997, Altes's ''The Little Book of Bad Business Advice'' was published by
St. Martin's Press
St. Martin's Press is a book publisher headquartered in Manhattan in New York City. It is headquartered in the Equitable Building (New York City), Equitable Building. St. Martin's Press is considered one of the largest English-language publishe ...
.
In 2001, a sequel, ''If You Jam the Copier, Bolt'' was published by
Andrews McMeel Publishing
Andrews McMeel Publishing, LLC (formerly Andrews, McMeel and Parker (1975–1986) and Andrews and McMeel (1986–1997)) is a company that publishes books, calendars, and related toys. It is a part of Andrews McMeel Universal, which comprises A ...
.
In 2005, Altes was a contributor to
Michael J. Rosen's anthology, ''May Contain Nuts: A Very Loose Canon of American Humor''. His piece satirized his career as a male model.
In 2006, the humor editor Judy Brown selected twenty of Altes's jokes to appear in her anthology ''Joke Express: Instant Delivery of 1,424 Funny Bits from the Best Comedians''.
In 2014, Altes ran a
Kickstarter
Kickstarter, PBC is an American Benefit corporation, public benefit corporation based in Brooklyn, New York City, that maintains a global crowdfunding platform focused on creativity. The company's stated mission is to "help bring creative project ...
campaign which raised $43,098 to finance the illustration of a
graphic novel
A graphic novel is a self-contained, book-length form of sequential art. The term ''graphic novel'' is often applied broadly, including fiction, non-fiction, and Anthology, anthologized work, though this practice is highly contested by comics sc ...
he had written about
hacks at MIT, titled ''
Geeks & Greeks''.
The graphic novel was illustrated by
Andy Fish and was published in 2016 to generally positive reviews.
Film appearances
Altes has appeared in a number of films and television shows after being accidentally "discovered" and cast as a German terrorist in ''
Die Hard With a Vengeance
''Die Hard with a Vengeance'' is a 1995 American action film directed and produced by John McTiernan, from a screenplay written by Jonathan Hensleigh, and starring Bruce Willis as John McClane. It is the third installment in the ''Die Hard'' f ...
'' in 1995.
Print modeling
Altes has worked as a commercial print model and hand model.
Other
Altes has also been:
* a screenwriter
* a commentator for
NPR
National Public Radio (NPR) is an American public broadcasting organization headquartered in Washington, D.C., with its NPR West headquarters in Culver City, California. It serves as a national Radio syndication, syndicator to a network of more ...
's ''
All Things Considered
''All Things Considered'' (''ATC'') is the flagship news program on the American network National Public Radio (NPR). It was the first news program on NPR, premiering on May 3, 1971. It is broadcast live on NPR affiliated stations in the United ...
''
* a member of ''
Us Weekly
''Us Weekly'' is an American weekly celebrity and entertainment magazine based in New York City. ''Us Weekly'' was founded in 1977 by The New York Times Company, which sold it in 1980. It was acquired by Wenner Media in 1986, and sold to Ameri ...
s Fashion Police
Awards
* 1991 - National Medal of Technology (co-recipient)
* 1990 - National Air and Space Museum Trophy for Current Achievement in Aerospace (co-recipient)
Personal
Altes lives in the Los Angeles area and is married to Diana Jellinek, an acting coach.
References
External links
Steve Altes official website
{{DEFAULTSORT:Altes, Steve
American graphic novelists
American humorists
Male models from New York (state)
MIT School of Engineering alumni
Fayetteville-Manlius High School alumni
Writers from Syracuse, New York
1962 births
Living people
People from Manlius, New York
Novelists from New York (state)