Sounds Fake But Okay (Book)
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''Sounds Fake but Okay'' is a weekly comedy
podcast A podcast is a Radio program, program made available in digital format for download over the Internet. Typically, a podcast is an Episode, episodic series of digital audio Computer file, files that users can download to a personal device or str ...
that focuses on
asexuality Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to others, or low or absent interest in or Sexual desire, desire for Human sexual activity, sexual activity. It may be considered a sexual orientation or the lack thereof. It may also be categori ...
and
aromanticism Aromanticism is a romantic orientation characterized by experiencing little to no romantic attraction. The term "aromantic", colloquially shortened to "aro", refers to a person whose romantic orientation is aromanticism. It is distinct from, ...
. The podcast is hosted by
University of Michigan The University of Michigan (U-M, U of M, or Michigan) is a public university, public research university in Ann Arbor, Michigan, United States. Founded in 1817, it is the oldest institution of higher education in the state. The University of Mi ...
alumni Sarah Costello and Kayla Kaszyca. Each Sunday, Costello and Kaszyca "talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else they just don't understand.""About"
''Sounds Fake But Okay''. Retrieved May 17, 2020.
In November 2020, it was honored with the 2020 Discover Pods Award for "Best LGBTQ+ Culture Podcast".


History

Costello and Kaszyca met when they were randomly placed as roommates at the University of Michigan. The pair immediately hit it off and became best friends. They did not discuss sexuality during their freshman year; neither Costello nor Kaszyca had fully figured out their identities yet. The summer after their freshman year, Costello
came out Coming out of the closet, often shortened to coming out, is a metaphor used to describe LGBTQ people's self-disclosure of their sexual orientation, romantic orientation, or gender identity. This is often framed and debated as a privacy issue, ...
as
aromantic Aromanticism is a romantic orientation characterized by experiencing little to no romantic attraction. The term "aromantic", Colloquialism, colloquially shortened to "aro", refers to a person whose romantic orientation is aromanticism. It is d ...
asexual Asexual or Asexuals may refer to: *Asexual reproduction **Asexual reproduction in starfish *Asexuality, the lack of sexual attraction to anyone or lack of interest in or desire for sexual activity. **Gray asexuality, the spectrum between asexualit ...
through a
Tumblr Tumblr (pronounced "tumbler") is a microblogging and Social networking service, social networking website founded by David Karp in 2007 and is owned by American company Automattic. The service allows users to post multimedia and other content ...
post which Kaszyca subsequently saw. After this, the pair discussed
sexuality Human sexuality is the way people experience and express themselves sexually. This involves biological, psychological, physical, erotic, emotional, social, or spiritual feelings and behaviors. Because it is a broad term, which has varied ...
regularly. As Costello had never dated, she had many questions for Kaszyca about how relationships and dating worked. The conversations that resulted from questions like "why would you date someone?" and "what is the appeal of kissing someone?" became the inspiration for the podcast.Kim, Michelle (July 18, 2019)
"These Podcasts Are Paving the Way for Aromantic and Asexual Representation"
. ''Them''.
Condé Nast Condé Nast () is a global mass media company founded in 1909 by Condé Nast (businessman), Condé Montrose Nast (1873–1942) and owned by Advance Publications. Its headquarters are located at One World Trade Center in the FiDi, Financial Dis ...
. Retrieved May 17, 2020.
Over the course of the podcast, Kaszyca realized that she was
demisexual Demisexuality is a term used to describe individuals who rarely experience primary sexual attraction – a type of attraction that is based on immediately observable characteristics such as appearance or smell, and is experienced immediately af ...
. Though she had begun to question her sexuality during her junior year of college, she did not come to terms with it until later. In episode 19 of the podcast, titled "Accepting Your Sexuality", Kaszyca explained how the podcast and Costello had helped her discover new things about herself.


Format and structure

''Sounds Fake but Okay'' is released weekly on Sundays at 14:00 UTC (10:00am Eastern) and episodes are about one hour long. The topics covered in each episode are inspired by conversations and experiences that the hosts share. Topics range from those serious, such as asexual people's place in the
queer ''Queer'' is an umbrella term for people who are non-heterosexual or non- cisgender. Originally meaning or , ''queer'' came to be used pejoratively against LGBTQ people in the late 19th century. From the late 1980s, queer activists began to ...
community, to lighthearted, such as discussions of
fandom A fandom is a subculture composed of Fan (person), fans characterized by a feeling of camaraderie with others who share a common interest. Fans typically are interested in even minor details of the objects of their fandom and spend a significan ...
or pop culture. The episodes are typically casual, with Costello and Kaszyca frequently going off on tangents or switching topics mid-episode. They announced during their first episode back from their hiatus that they would be taking breaks in the winter and summer. Though the show generally only features Costello and Kaszyca, they are occasionally joined by guests. Guests have included people the hosts met at school, members of Costello's family (both her sister and her mother), and other creators and
activists Activism consists of efforts to promote, impede, direct or intervene in social, political, economic or environmental reform with the desire to make changes in society toward a perceived common good. Forms of activism range from mandate build ...
in the asexual and aromantic communities. In episode 117, they were joined by Yasmin Benoit, a notable aro-ace activist and model. They subsequently removed this episode from their playlists at Benoit's request.


Media and events

* In December 2018, the podcast was featured in the annual Sex Issue published by ''The Michigan Daily''. * In June 2019, Costello and Kaszyca appeared on the
Star Wars ''Star Wars'' is an American epic film, epic space opera media franchise created by George Lucas, which began with the Star Wars (film), eponymous 1977 film and Cultural impact of Star Wars, quickly became a worldwide popular culture, pop cu ...
podcast ''Friends of the Force: A Star Wars Podcast''. The group discussed the Eleven-Thirty Eight article "The Asexual Awakens – An Interpretation of the Journey to Adulthood", and Costello put forth her headcanon that
Luke Skywalker Luke Skywalker is a fictional character in the ''Star Wars'' franchise. He was introduced in the original film trilogy as the main protagonist and also appears in the sequel trilogy. Raised as a poor moisture farmer on the desert planet Tat ...
and Rey of ''Star Wars'' are aro-ace. * In October 2019, the podcast was featured in a series of interview
blogs A blog (a Clipping (morphology), truncation of "weblog") is an informational website consisting of discrete, often informal diary-style text entries also known as posts. Posts are typically displayed in Reverse chronology, reverse chronologic ...
written by the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) for Asexual Awareness Week. * In October 2019, Costello and Kaszyca gave a talk titled "Creating While Asexual" at the University of Michigan
Spectrum Center The Spectrum Center is an indoor arena in Charlotte, North Carolina, United States. Located in Uptown Charlotte, Uptown, it is owned by the city of Charlotte and operated by its main tenant, the Charlotte Hornets of the National Basketball Ass ...
. * In February 2020, Costello was featured in a series of interview blogs written by the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) for Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week. * In February 2020, the podcast was featured alongside the aro-ace podcast ''A OK'' in an Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week article by
them. ''Them'' is an American online LGBTQ magazine launched in October 2017 by Phillip Picardi and owned by Condé Nast. Its coverage includes LGBTQ culture, fashion, and politics. History In 2017 Picardi, then the director of ''Teen Vogue'', ...
* In May 2020, Costello and Kaszyca hosted a livestream
fundraiser Fundraising or fund-raising is the process of seeking and gathering voluntary financial contributions by engaging individuals, businesses, charitable foundations, or governmental agencies. Although fundraising typically refers to efforts to gathe ...
to raise money for the
World Health Organization The World Health Organization (WHO) is a list of specialized agencies of the United Nations, specialized agency of the United Nations which coordinates responses to international public health issues and emergencies. It is headquartered in Gen ...
/
United Nations The United Nations (UN) is the Earth, global intergovernmental organization established by the signing of the Charter of the United Nations, UN Charter on 26 June 1945 with the stated purpose of maintaining international peace and internationa ...
COVID-19 Solidarity Response Fund. They were joined on the livestream by YouTuber Emi Salida, members of the Aromantic-spectrum Union for Recognition, Education, and Advocacy (AUREA),
blogger A blog (a Clipping (morphology), truncation of "weblog") is an informational website consisting of discrete, often informal diary-style text entries also known as posts. Posts are typically displayed in Reverse chronology, reverse chronologic ...
Rose Sinclair, YouTuber Daniel Walker, comedian Eliott Simpson,
podcaster A podcast is a program made available in digital format for download over the Internet. Typically, a podcast is an episodic series of digital audio files that users can download to a personal device or stream to listen to at a time of their ...
Courtney Lang, activist Yasmin Benoit, and AVEN founder
David Jay David Jay (born April 24, 1982) is an American asexual activist. Jay is the founder and webmaster of the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN), the most prolific and well-known of the various asexual communities established since th ...
. Ultimately, $4,111 was raised for the cause. * In September 2020, Costello and Kaszyca were panelists at the UK Asexuality Conference 2020 Edition. Costello spoke on the Aro Aces panel while Kaszyca spoke on the Romantic Relationships and Grey-Asexuality & Demisexuality panels. * In January 2021, Costello and Kaszyca were guests on the podcast Queery, discussing aspec identities, getting excluded from the queer community, and their private and public instances of coming out. * In March 2024, the Michigan magazine '' Between the Lines'' published a front page article about Costello and Kaszyca and the creation of the podcast in the March issue of the magazine.


Book

On December 8, 2020, the show's official Twitter account announced that Costello and Kaszyca would be releasing a book, focusing on "the aspec lens, asexual relationships, and how the aspec mindset can apply to every aspect of your life." On February 21, 2023, the book ''Sounds Fake but Okay: An Asexual and Aromantic Perspective on Love, Relationships, Sex, and Pretty Much Anything Else'' was published by
Jessica Kingsley Publishers Jessica Kingsley Publishers (JKP) is a multinational publishing house headquartered in London. It was founded as an independent publisher in 1987 by Jessica Kingsley. Since 2017, JKP operates as an imprint of John Murray Press. History Early ...
.


Awards and recognitions

* In November 2020, Costello and Kaszyca, along with their podcast, were honored the 2020 Discover Pods Award for "Best LGBTQ+ Culture Podcast". * In April 2023, ''Cosmopolitan'' recognized the podcast as one of the "14 best podcasts of 2023".


See also

* List of LGBTQ podcasts


References


External links

* {{Asexuality topics 2017 podcast debuts Audio podcasts LGBTQ-related podcasts Asexuality Aromanticism