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Polyfidelity is a type of non-monogamous relationship in which all members are recognized as equivalent to the other partners and comply to restrict sexual and
romantic relationship Romance or romantic love is a feeling of love for, or a strong attraction towards another person, and the courtship behaviors undertaken by an individual to express those overall feelings and resultant emotions. The ''Wiley Blackwell En ...
activities to exclusively only other members within the group.


Origin

The practices and beliefs underlying polyfidelity have long existed, but in uncodified fashion. The Oneida Commune of the mid-19th century practiced complex marriage, encouraging individual members in the freedom to have multiple ongoing sexual relationships within the community, as an expression of their beliefs and religious faith. This was occasionally referred to as a
group marriage ''Group Marriage'' is a 1972 sex comedy film directed by Stephanie Rothman. It was the first film she made for Dimension Pictures, a company in which she was a minor shareholder with her husband Charles Swartz along with Larry Woolner. Plot Chri ...
, a term brought back to popular recognition by the 1974 publication of ''Group Marriage: a study of contemporary multilateral marriage'' by
Larry Constantine Larry LeRoy Constantine (born 1943) is an American software engineer, professor in the Center for Exact Sciences and Engineering at the University of Madeira Portugal, and considered one of the pioneers of computing. He has contributed numerous ...
and Joan Constantine. The term polyfidelity was also practiced in the "New Tribe" of the Kerista Commune. A utopian community based in the Haight-Ashbury district of San Francisco, California active from the 1970s to the early 1990s. The engaged in a specific form of polyamory. Members were required to engage in multi-partner relationships that prioritize equality, and mutual consent. Respecting diverse
gender Gender is the range of social, psychological, cultural, and behavioral aspects of being a man (or boy), woman (or girl), or third gender. Although gender often corresponds to sex, a transgender person may identify with a gender other tha ...
identities and sexual orientations. Sexual activity with all members was encouraged while forming exclusive relationships within the group was discouraged. Consensus was essential for incorporating new members in and also respecting the group's foundational agreement. The broader term ''
polyamory Polyamory () is the practice of, or the desire for, romantic relationships with more than one partner at the same time, with the informed consent of all partners involved. Some people who identify as polyamorous believe in consensual non-mon ...
'' was coined later. The word "polyamorous" first appeared in an article by Morning Glory Zell-Ravenheart, "A Bouquet of Lovers", published in May 1990 in ''Green Egg'' magazine, as "poly-amorous". In May 1992, Jennifer L. Wesp created the
Usenet Usenet (), a portmanteau of User's Network, is a worldwide distributed discussion system available on computers. It was developed from the general-purpose UUCP, Unix-to-Unix Copy (UUCP) dial-up network architecture. Tom Truscott and Jim Elli ...
newsgroup alt.polyamory, and the Oxford English Dictionary (OED) cites the proposal to create that group as the first verified appearance of the word. The words ''polyamory'', ''polyamorous'', and ''polyamorist'' were added to the OED in 2006.


Function

Polyfidelitous relationships are, like
monogamous Monogamy ( ) is a relationship of two individuals in which they form a mutual and exclusive intimate partnership. Having only one partner at any one time, whether for life or serial monogamy, contrasts with various forms of non-monogamy (e.g. ...
relationships, ''closed'' in the sense that partners agree not to be sexually or romantically intimate with someone not in the relationship. The difference is that more than two people are included in the closed group. New members may generally be added to the group only by unanimous agreement of the existing members, or the group may not be interested in further expansion. While being a subtype of the more general
polyamory Polyamory () is the practice of, or the desire for, romantic relationships with more than one partner at the same time, with the informed consent of all partners involved. Some people who identify as polyamorous believe in consensual non-mon ...
, polyfidelity can resemble monogamy in its relationship power dynamics, attitudes towards autonomy, and group consent, as most often polyfidelity develops from an established closed-monogamous couple seeking to add one or more individuals or another couple. In this sense, polyfidelity expands upon standard practices and beliefs of monogamy while still being categorically
polyamory Polyamory () is the practice of, or the desire for, romantic relationships with more than one partner at the same time, with the informed consent of all partners involved. Some people who identify as polyamorous believe in consensual non-mon ...
.


Benefits and challenges

A commonly cited advantage of polyfidelity is the ability to have unprotected sex among more than two people while maintaining relative safety regarding STDs, so long as any new members are sufficiently tested before fluid bonding with the group, and keep their commitments. This would have health advantages similar to
monogamy Monogamy ( ) is a social relation, relationship of Dyad (sociology), two individuals in which they form a mutual and exclusive intimate Significant other, partnership. Having only one partner at any one time, whether for life or #Serial monogamy ...
, although risks rise somewhat with each person added. Some gain a sense of emotional safety from the relatively closed nature of the poly faithful commitment. Polyfidelity inherently affords less flexibility than other forms of nonmonogamy. For example, open relationships do not restrict sexual interactions to specific people. As many polyfidelitous people have transitioned directly from closed monogamy, they can encounter problems in learning to communicate intimately with more than one partner. People hoping to create or expand a group marriage mention difficulty finding potential partners with enough mutual compatibility to even consider attempting a relationship. Polyfidelity, like other forms of consensual non-monogamy, can present the challenge of managing jealousy, maintaining clear communication, and ensuring equitable distribution of emotional and practical responsibilities. Successful polyfidelity often requires strong commitment and communication skills among all members.


Other usage

In the book ''Lesbian Polyfidelity'', author Celeste West uses the term ''polyfidelity'' in much the same way that others use polyamory. This may represent independent coinage of the same term within a different community, and this usage is not common among polyamorists in general. West uses the term to emphasize the concept (common in polyamory) that one can be faithful to one's commitments without those commitments including sexual exclusivity.


See also

*
Free love Free love is a social movement that accepts all forms of love. The movement's initial goal was to separate the State (polity), state from sexual and romantic matters such as marriage, birth control, and adultery. It stated that such issues we ...
*
Group marriage ''Group Marriage'' is a 1972 sex comedy film directed by Stephanie Rothman. It was the first film she made for Dimension Pictures, a company in which she was a minor shareholder with her husband Charles Swartz along with Larry Woolner. Plot Chri ...
* Kerista *
Non-monogamy Non-monogamy (or nonmonogamy) is an umbrella term that describes a relationship arrangement where one or more partners are not sexually and/or romantically exclusive to each other. Monogamy and non-monogamy are not strictly binary categories, ...
* Open marriage *
Polyamory Polyamory () is the practice of, or the desire for, romantic relationships with more than one partner at the same time, with the informed consent of all partners involved. Some people who identify as polyamorous believe in consensual non-mon ...


References


External links


Terms and definitions from Loving More non-profit organization
{{Family Polyamory Polyamorous terminology Sexual fidelity