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Pauline Esther Phillips (born Friedman; July 4, 1918 – January 16, 2013), also known as Abigail Van Buren, was an American advice columnist and radio show host who began the well-known ''Dear Abby'' newspaper column in 1956. It became the most widely syndicated newspaper column in the world, syndicated in 1,400 newspapers with 110 million readers. From 1963 to 1975, Phillips also hosted a daily ''Dear Abby'' program on CBS Radio. TV anchorwoman
Diane Sawyer Lila Diane Sawyer (; born December 22, 1945) is an American television broadcast journalist known for anchoring major programs on two networks including ''ABC World News Tonight'', ''Good Morning America'', ''20/20 (U.S. TV series), 20/20'', and ...
calls her the "pioneering queen of salty advice". She was also the paternal stepgrandmother of U.S. Congressman Dean Phillips.


Early life

Pauline Friedman, nicknamed "Popo", was born in
Sioux City, Iowa Sioux City () is a city in Woodbury County, Iowa, Woodbury and Plymouth County, Iowa, Plymouth counties in the U.S. state of Iowa. The population was 85,797 in the 2020 United States Census, 2020 census, making it the List of cities in Iowa, fo ...
, to Russian Jewish immigrants Rebecca (née Rushall) and Abraham B. Friedman, owner of a chain of movie theaters. She was the youngest of four sisters and grew up in Sioux City. Her identical twin Esther Pauline Friedman (married name Lederer) was columnist
Ann Landers Ann Landers was a pen name created by ''Chicago Sun-Times'' advice columnist Ruth Crowley in 1943 and taken over by Esther Pauline "Eppie" Lederer in 1955. For 56 years, the ''Ask Ann Landers'' syndicated advice column was a regular featur ...
. Lederer had become Ann Landers in 1955, and Phillips soon followed suit by launching her own advice column. Phillips graduated from Central High School in Sioux City and Morningside College, where she studied journalism and psychology. She and her twin sister wrote a joint gossip column for the college newspaper. They were married in a double wedding ceremony on July 2, 1939, two days before their 21st birthday. Pauline married Morton Phillips of
Minneapolis Minneapolis is a city in Hennepin County, Minnesota, United States, and its county seat. With a population of 429,954 as of the 2020 United States census, 2020 census, it is the state's List of cities in Minnesota, most populous city. Locat ...
, and had son Edward and daughter Jeanne.


Career

Phillips' writing career began in January 1956 when she was 37 and new to the San Francisco area. She phoned the editor of the ''San Francisco Chronicle'' and said that she could write a better advice column than the one that she had been reading in the newspaper. After hearing her modest credentials, editor Stanleigh Arnold gave her some letters in need of answers and told her to bring back her replies in a week; Phillips got her replies back to the ''Chronicle'' in an hour and a half. In an interview with
Larry King Larry King (born Lawrence Harvey Zeiger; November 19, 1933 – January 23, 2021) was an American TV and radio host presenter, author, and former spokesman. He was a WMBM radio interviewer in the Miami area in the 1950s and 1960s and beginning in ...
, she said that she had no work experience, lacking even a social security number. The editor, however, asked if she was a professional writer. He said that her writing was "fabulous', and she was hired that day. She went by the pen name Abigail Van Buren, combining the
Old Testament The Old Testament (OT) is the first division of the Christian biblical canon, which is based primarily upon the 24 books of the Hebrew Bible, or Tanakh, a collection of ancient religious Hebrew and occasionally Aramaic writings by the Isr ...
prophetess from
1 Samuel The Book of Samuel () is a book in the Hebrew Bible, found as two books (1–2 Samuel) in the Old Testament. The book is part of the Deuteronomistic history, a series of books (Joshua, Judges, Samuel, and Kings) that constitute a theological ...
with President
Martin Van Buren Martin Van Buren ( ; ; December 5, 1782 – July 24, 1862) was the eighth president of the United States, serving from 1837 to 1841. A primary founder of the Democratic Party (United States), Democratic Party, he served as Attorney General o ...
. Her twin sister was the author of the
Ann Landers Ann Landers was a pen name created by ''Chicago Sun-Times'' advice columnist Ruth Crowley in 1943 and taken over by Esther Pauline "Eppie" Lederer in 1955. For 56 years, the ''Ask Ann Landers'' syndicated advice column was a regular featur ...
column, and the competition created acrimony between them for many years. In 1956, Phillips offered her column to the '' Sioux City Journal'' at a reduced price, provided that the paper refuse to print her sister's column. The sisters ostensibly reconciled in 1964 but remained competitors. They became "the most widely read and most quoted women in the world" in 1958, according to ''Life'' magazine.''Life'' magazine, April 7, 1958 pp. 102–112


Writing style

Newspapers had included gossip and personal columnists for more than a century, but the two sisters added "something special", according to ''Life'', in that they were the first to publish letters and replies covering a wide range of personal problems, replying with "vaudeville punch lines" rooted in common sense. The editor of the ''Chicago Sun-Times'' described their skill as "beyond mere shrewdness—a quality very close to genuine wisdom." Phillips stated that she did not publish the most sensitive letters that she received, but instead replied to them individually. Sometimes she would write a brief note on the letter itself, letting one of her secretaries respond fully using her advice. If a person seemed suicidal from their letter, she would call them on the phone.


Personal life and beliefs

Phillips was considered "the embodiment of female orthodoxy." This attitude carried over into her column in the late 1950s, and she considered women "faintly ridiculous" if they were unable to make their marriages work. Her "code of conduct" was "husband and children first." In her later years, she did not avoid suggesting divorce when a relationship became "intolerable", and considered how a bad marriage might affect children: "When kids see parents fighting, or even sniping at each other, I think it is terribly damaging." Phillips supported gay rights, and season 1, episode 8 of the
podcast A podcast is a Radio program, program made available in digital format for download over the Internet. Typically, a podcast is an Episode, episodic series of digital audio Computer file, files that users can download to a personal device or str ...
'' Making Gay History'' is about her. Both Phillips and her sister enjoyed socializing with celebrities, and because of their notoriety, celebrities liked being seen with them. Among Phillips' friends soon after she began her column were politicians, including Senators Hubert Humphrey and Herbert Lehman; and entertainers, including
Jerry Lewis Jerry Lewis (born Joseph Levitch; March 16, 1926 – August 20, 2017) was an American comedian, actor, singer, filmmaker and humanitarian, with a career spanning seven decades in film, stage, television and radio. Famously nicknamed as "Th ...
and
Dean Martin Dean Martin (born Dino Paul Crocetti; June 7, 1917 – December 25, 1995) was an American singer, actor, and comedian. Nicknamed the "Honorific nicknames in popular music, King of Cool", he is regarded as one of the most popular entertainers of ...
. They also admired Bishop
Fulton Sheen Fulton John Sheen (born Peter John Sheen; May 8, 1895 – December 9, 1979) was an Catholic Church in the United States, American Catholic prelate who served as Roman Catholic Diocese of Rochester, Bishop of Rochester from 1966 to 1969. He was ...
, whom they met when learning about Catholicism while studying about other religions. The bishop admired them both in return due to their ability to remain "unawed" and unaffected by the fame of others. Phillips was Jewish, and she commented: "He's one of the greatest men I ever met, but he'll be a Jew before I'm a Catholic." Phillips was an honorary member of Women in Communications, the American College of Psychiatrists, and the National Council of Jewish Women. Her columns were collected in ''Dear Abby'', ''Dear Teenager'', ''Dear Abby on Marriage'', ''Where Were You When President Kennedy was Shot?'', ''The Dear Abby Wedding Planner'', and ''The Best of Dear Abby''.Universal Press Syndicate historical files. She said that writing is "only work if you'd rather be doing something else." She co-wrote the column with her daughter Jeanne from 1987 until her retirement. In 2002, Phillips'
Alzheimer's disease Alzheimer's disease (AD) is a neurodegenerative disease and the cause of 60–70% of cases of dementia. The most common early symptom is difficulty in remembering recent events. As the disease advances, symptoms can include problems wit ...
made it impossible for her to continue writing, and Jeanne assumed all the writing responsibilities of ''Dear Abby''.


Death

Phillips died on January 16, 2013, at age 94, after battling Alzheimer's for 11 years. She was survived by her husband of 73 years, Morton Phillips, daughter Jeanne Phillips, four grandchildren, and two great-grandchildren. Her son, Edward, had died two years prior.


Bibliography


Books about Dear Abby

* (Children's book). *


Books by Abigail Van Buren

* ''Dear Abby''. Illustrated by Carl Rose. Englewood Cliffs, N.J.: Prentice-Hall,
958 Year 958 (Roman numerals, CMLVIII) was a common year starting on Friday of the Julian calendar. Events By place Byzantine Empire * October / November – Battle of Raban: The Byzantine Empire, Byzantines under John I Tzimiskes, Jo ...
* ''Dear teen-ager''. Illustrated by Roy Doty. ew York B. Geis Associates; distributed by Random House 959 * ''Dear Abby on marriage''. New York: McGraw-Hill, 962 * ''The Best of Dear Abby''. Kansas City: Andrews and McMeel, 1981. ; 081613362X (lg. print.) * ''Dear Abby on planning your wedding''. Andrews and McMeel, c1988. . * ''Where were you when President Kennedy was shot?: memories and tributes to a slain president as told to Dear Abby''. Foreword by Pierre Salinger. Andrews and McMeel, c. 1993. .


See also

* List of newspaper columnists * Poisoned candy scare


References


External links


Dear Abby
official website
"Abigail Van Buren 1918–2013"
(March 20, 2009) by Robin Judd, ''Jewish Women: A Comprehensive Historical Encyclopedia'', Jewish Women's Archive (jwa.org) * {{DEFAULTSORT:Phillips, Pauline American advice columnists Jewish advice columnists American women columnists Jewish American non-fiction writers Jewish American journalists Jewish women writers 20th-century American women journalists 20th-century American journalists Journalists from Iowa Journalists from California Writers from Sioux City, Iowa Pseudonymous women writers Mass media people from Beverly Hills, California American people of Russian-Jewish descent American twins Identical twins Deaths from Alzheimer's disease in Minnesota 1918 births 2013 deaths 20th-century American women 20th-century American women writers 20th-century pseudonymous writers 21st-century American Jews 21st-century American women journalists 21st-century American journalists 21st-century American women writers