Matron Of Honor
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Bridesmaids are members of the bride's party at some
Western Western may refer to: Places *Western, Nebraska, a village in the US *Western, New York, a town in the US *Western Creek, Tasmania, a locality in Australia *Western Junction, Tasmania, a locality in Australia *Western world, countries that id ...
traditional wedding ceremonies. A bridesmaid is typically a young woman and often the
bride A bride is a woman who is about to be married or who is a newlywed. When marrying, if the bride's future spouse is a man, he is usually referred to as the ''bridegroom'' or just ''groom''. In Western culture, a bride may be attended by a maid, ...
's close friend or relative. She attends to the bride on the day of a
wedding A wedding is a ceremony in which two people are united in marriage. Wedding traditions and customs vary greatly between cultures, ethnicity, ethnicities, Race (human categorization), races, religions, Religious denomination, denominations, Cou ...
or
marriage Marriage, also called matrimony or wedlock, is a culturally and often legally recognised union between people called spouses. It establishes rights and obligations between them, as well as between them and their children (if any), and b ...
ceremony. Traditionally, bridesmaids were chosen from unwed young women of
marriageable age Marriageable age is the minimum legal age of marriage. Age and other prerequisites to marriage vary between jurisdictions, but in the vast majority of jurisdictions, the marriageable age as a right is set at the age of majority. Nevertheless, ...
. The principal bridesmaid, if one is designated, may be called the chief bridesmaid. She may also be called the maid of honor if she is unmarried, or the matron of honor if she is married. A junior bridesmaid is a girl who is clearly too young to be married but who is included as a bridesmaid anyway. In the United States, typically only the maid or matron of honor and the
best man A groomsman or usher is one of the male attendants to the groom in a wedding ceremony. Usually, the groom selects close friends and relatives to serve as groomsmen, and it is considered an honor to be selected. From his groomsmen, the groom usuall ...
are considered official witnesses for the wedding license. Often there is more than one bridesmaid; in modern times the bride chooses how many to ask. Historically, no person of status went out unattended, and the size of the retinue was closely calculated to be appropriate to the family's social status. A large group of bridesmaids provided an opportunity for showing off the family's social status and
wealth Wealth is the abundance of valuable financial assets or physical possessions which can be converted into a form that can be used for transactions. This includes the core meaning as held in the originating Old English word , which is from an ...
. Today, the number of bridesmaids in a wedding party is dependent on many variables, including a bride's preferences, the size of her family, and the number of attendants her partner would like to have as well. Many modern couples do not have bridesmaids or groomsmen, which eliminates all the associated expenses and logistical effort.


Related roles

The male equivalent is the
groomsman A groomsman or usher is one of the male attendants to the groom in a wedding ceremony. Usually, the groom selects close friends and relatives to serve as groomsmen, and it is considered an honor to be selected. From his groomsmen, the groom usuall ...
, also known in
British English British English is the set of Variety (linguistics), varieties of the English language native to the United Kingdom, especially Great Britain. More narrowly, it can refer specifically to the English language in England, or, more broadly, to ...
as an ''usher.'' In the United States, the role of attending to the groom has diverged from that of escorting guests to their seats, and the two positions are no longer synonymous and are often, if not usually, filled by different persons. In some cultures, such as in Norway, the Netherlands, France and
Victorian Britain In the history of the United Kingdom and the British Empire, the Victorian era was the reign of Queen Victoria, from 20 June 1837 until her death on 22 January 1901. Slightly different definitions are sometimes used. The era followed th ...
, it is (or has been) customary for bridesmaids to be small girls rather than grown women. They may carry flowers during the wedding procession and pose with the married couple in bridal photos. In modern English-speaking countries, this role is separate from that of the bridesmaid, and the small child performing it is known as a
flower girl A flower girl is a young female who scatters flower petals down the aisle during a wedding procession. In weddings 200px, alt=Smiling girl scattering flower petals at an outdoor wedding, Flower girl at a wedding A flower girl in 1940s New Z ...
.


Duties

Although many exceed the minimum, the bridesmaids' required duties are very limited. They are required to attend the wedding ceremony and to assist the bride on the day of the wedding. Bridesmaids in Europe and North America are often asked to assist the bride with planning the wedding and a
wedding reception A wedding reception is a party usually held after the completion of a marriage ceremony as hospitality for those who have attended the wedding, hence the name reception: the couple ''receive'' society, in the form of family and friends, for th ...
. In modern times, a bridesmaid often participates in planning wedding-related events, such as a
bridal shower A bridal shower is a gift-giving party held for a bride-to-be in anticipation of her wedding. The history of the custom is rooted not necessarily for the provision of goods for the upcoming matrimonial home, but to provide goods and financial as ...
or
bachelorette party A bachelorette party (United States and Canada) or hen night (United Kingdom, UK, Republic of Ireland, Ireland and Australia) is a party held for a woman (the bride or bride-to-be) who will soon be Marriage, married. While Beth Montemurro conclud ...
, if there are any. These, however, are optional activities; according to etiquette expert
Judith Martin Judith Martin (née Perlman; born September 13, 1938), better known by the pen name Miss Manners, is an American columnist, author, and etiquette authority. Early life and career Martin is the daughter of Helen and Jacob Perlman, both Jewish. ...
, "Contrary to rumor, bridesmaids are not obliged to entertain in honor of the bride, nor to wear dresses they cannot afford." If it is customary in the bride's area to have a bridesmaids luncheon, then it is hosted, and therefore organized and paid for, by the bride. The duties and costs of being a bridesmaid are parsed out between a bride and her attendants in a variety of ways. Since modern bridesmaids, unlike their historical counterparts, can no longer rely on having their clothes and travel expenses paid for by the bride's family, it has become customary for the bride to present the bridesmaids with gifts as a sign of gratitude for the support and financial commitment that comes with their roles. It has become equally customary for women who are invited to serve as bridesmaids to first ask about the amount of time, energy, and money that the bride expects from them before accepting this position, and to decline or resign if this is more than they will be able to give. In some American weddings, each bridesmaid may be asked to spend US$1,700 or more, with travel to
destination wedding A wedding is a ceremony in which two people are united in marriage. Wedding traditions and customs vary greatly between cultures, ethnicity, ethnicities, Race (human categorization), races, religions, Religious denomination, denominations, Cou ...
s and pre-wedding parties usually being the biggest expense.


Maid of honor

In the United Kingdom, the term "
maid of honour A maid of honour is a junior attendant of a queen in royal households. The position was and is junior to the lady-in-waiting. The equivalent title and office has historically been used in most European royal courts. Tudors and Stuarts Traditi ...
" originally referred to the female attendant of a
queen Queen most commonly refers to: * Queen regnant, a female monarch of a kingdom * Queen consort, the wife of a reigning king * Queen (band), a British rock band Queen or QUEEN may also refer to: Monarchy * Queen dowager, the widow of a king * Q ...
. The term 'bridesmaid' is normally used for all bridal attendants in the UK. However, when the attendant is married, or is a mature woman, the term 'matron of honour' is often used. The influence of American English has led to the chief bridesmaid sometimes being called the maid of honour. In North America, a wedding party might include several bridesmaids, but the 'maid of honor' is the title and position held by the bride's chief attendant, typically her closest friend or sister. In modern-day weddings, some brides opt to choose a long-time male friend or brother as their head attendant, using the title 'best man' or 'man of honor'. The activities of the principal bridesmaid may be as many or as varied as she allows the bride to impose upon her. Her only required duty is to participate in the wedding ceremony. Typically, however, she is asked for help with the logistics of the wedding as an event, such as addressing invitations, and for her help as a friend, such as attending the bride as she shops for her wedding dress. Aside from being the bride's right hand, the maid of honor is responsible for leading the rest of the bridal party through the planning of any pre-wedding events. For example, the principal bridesmaid will be the one to make the arrangements for the bridal shower, including invitations, decorations, food, and any games or activities that will be played. He or she will also be in charge of planning the bachelorette party, including any travel or lodging accommodations that must be arranged. On the day of the wedding, her principal duty is to provide practical and emotional support. She might assist the bride with dressing and, if needed, help the bride manage her veil, a bouquet, a prayer book, or the train of her wedding dress during the day. In a double-ring wedding, the chief bridesmaid is often entrusted with the groom's
wedding ring A wedding ring or wedding band is a finger ring that indicates that its wearer is married. It is usually forged from metal, traditionally gold or another precious metal. Rings were used in ancient Rome during marriage. In western culture, a ...
until it is needed during the ceremony. Many brides ask bridesmaids if they are
adults An adult is an animal that has reached full growth. The biological definition of the word means an animal reaching sexual maturity and thus capable of reproduction. In the human context, the term ''adult'' has meanings associated with social and ...
, to be legal witnesses who sign the
marriage license A marriage license (or marriage licence in Commonwealth spelling) is a document issued, either by a religious organization or state authority, authorizing a couple to marry. The procedure for obtaining a license varies between jurisdictions ...
after the ceremony. If there is a reception after the wedding, the maid of honor may be asked to offer a toast to the newlywed.


Origin and history

The origin of the Western bridesmaid tradition likely arose from a combination of many factors. The most-likely factors include, but are not limited to, socioeconomic class and status, family size, socialization standards of the day, and religion. Others cite the
Biblical The Bible is a collection of religious texts that are central to Christianity and Judaism, and esteemed in other Abrahamic religions such as Islam. The Bible is an anthology (a compilation of texts of a variety of forms) biblical languages ...
story of
Jacob Jacob, later known as Israel, is a Hebrew patriarch of the Abrahamic religions. He first appears in the Torah, where he is described in the Book of Genesis as a son of Isaac and Rebecca. Accordingly, alongside his older fraternal twin brother E ...
, and his two wives
Leah Leah () appears in the Hebrew Bible as one of the two wives of the Biblical patriarch Jacob. Leah was Jacob's first wife, and the older sister of his second (and favored) wife Rachel. She is the mother of Jacob's first son Reuben. She has thr ...
and
Rachel Rachel () was a Bible, Biblical figure, the favorite of Jacob's two wives, and the mother of Joseph (Genesis), Joseph and Benjamin, two of the twelve progenitors of the tribes of Israel. Rachel's father was Laban (Bible), Laban. Her older siste ...
, who both literally came with their own
maid A maid, housemaid, or maidservant is a female domestic worker. In the Victorian era, domestic service was the second-largest category of employment in England and Wales, after agricultural work. In developed Western nations, full-time maids a ...
s as detailed in the
Book of Genesis The Book of Genesis (from Greek language, Greek ; ; ) is the first book of the Hebrew Bible and the Christian Old Testament. Its Hebrew name is the same as its incipit, first word, (In the beginning (phrase), 'In the beginning'). Genesis purpor ...
(29:24, 46:18) as the origin of bridesmaids. These women were
handmaiden A handmaiden (nowadays less commonly handmaid or maidservant) is a personal maid or female servant. The term is also used metaphorically for something whose primary role is to serve or assist. Depending on culture or historical period, a handma ...
s (servants or slaves) instead of social peers. In ancient times, originally the bride and all the bridesmaids wore exactly the same dress and veiled their faces heavily, for the purpose of confusing jealous suitors and evil spirits. In China during the feudal era, brides were susceptible to kidnapping at weddings by rival clans and hooligans. Shouldering the responsibility to protect the bride, bridesmaids were dressed up like the bride to lower the risk that she might be identified and taken. As legal protections for marriage were established, this was no longer necessary, and the role of bridesmaid took a more symbolic turn. In the
Victorian era In the history of the United Kingdom and the British Empire, the Victorian era was the reign of Queen Victoria, from 20 June 1837 until her death on 22 January 1901. Slightly different definitions are sometimes used. The era followed the ...
, white was the official color for both male groomsmen and female bridesmaids. This trend originated with
Queen Victoria Victoria (Alexandrina Victoria; 24 May 1819 – 22 January 1901) was Queen of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland from 20 June 1837 until Death and state funeral of Queen Victoria, her death in January 1901. Her reign of 63 year ...
when she married
Prince Albert Prince Albert most commonly refers to: *Prince Albert of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha (1819–1861), consort of Queen Victoria *Albert II, Prince of Monaco (born 1958), present head of state of Monaco Prince Albert may also refer to: Royalty * Alb ...
wearing a long white wedding dress, and her bridesmaids matched the color of her gown.


See also

*
Bridesman A bridesman is a close male friend and/or relative of the bride, one who walks down the aisle in the bridal ceremony in the traditional place of a bridesmaid. Charlotte Brontë made reference to bridesmen, seemingly in the modern sense, in the fi ...


References


External links

*
A Salute to Bridesmaids
slideshow by ''
Life magazine ''Life'' (stylized as ''LIFE'') is an American magazine launched in 1883 as a weekly publication. In 1972, it transitioned to publishing "special" issues before running as a monthly from 1978 to 2000. Since then, ''Life'' has irregularly publi ...
''
Do’s and Don’ts for Maid of Honor Speeches
blog written by ''New World Diamonds'' {{Wedding Wedding ceremony participants