Lois W.
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Lois Wilson (née Burnham; March 4, 1891 – October 5, 1988), also known as Lois W., was the co-founder of Al-Anon Family Groups, a 12-Step fellowship for the friends and family of
alcoholics Alcoholism is the continued drinking of alcohol despite it causing problems. Some definitions require evidence of dependence and withdrawal. Problematic use of alcohol has been mentioned in the earliest historical records. The World Hea ...
. She was the wife of
Alcoholics Anonymous Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) is a global, peer-led Mutual aid, mutual-aid fellowship focused on an abstinence-based recovery model from alcoholism through its spiritually inclined twelve-step program. AA's Twelve Traditions, besides emphasizing anon ...
(AA) co-founder Bill W. They both followed their respective groups'
tradition A tradition is a system of beliefs or behaviors (folk custom) passed down within a group of people or society with symbolic meaning or special significance with origins in the past. A component of cultural expressions and folklore, common e ...
of anonymity until ''
The New York Times ''The New York Times'' (''NYT'') is an American daily newspaper based in New York City. ''The New York Times'' covers domestic, national, and international news, and publishes opinion pieces, investigative reports, and reviews. As one of ...
'' revealed their full names upon Bill's death in 1971. However, she continued to be known as Lois W. within Al-Anon until her death.


Early life and education

Lois was the first of six children born to Matilda Burnham (née Spelman) and
Brooklyn Heights Brooklyn Heights is a residential neighborhood within the New York City borough of Brooklyn. The neighborhood is bounded by Old Fulton Street near the Brooklyn Bridge on the north, Cadman Plaza West on the east, Atlantic Avenue on the south ...
New York surgeon Clark Burnham. Lois was raised in the
Swedenborgian The New Church (or Swedenborgianism) can refer to any of several historically related Christian denominations that developed under the influence of the theology of Emanuel Swedenborg (1688–1772). The Swedenborgian tradition is considered to ...
faith, of which her grandfather was a pastor. Lois's kindergarten was run by the
Pratt Institute Pratt Institute is a private university with its main campus in Brooklyn, New York. It has an additional campus in Manhattan and an extension campus in Utica, New York at the Munson-Williams-Proctor Arts Institute. The institute was founded in 18 ...
, and after that she attended Friends School. She graduated from the
Packer Collegiate Institute The Packer Collegiate Institute is an independent college preparatory school for students from pre-kindergarten through grade 12. Formerly the Brooklyn Female Academy, Packer has been located at 170 Joralemon Street in the historic district of ...
with a concentration in the fine arts. She had a talent for drawing, and later became an interior decorator. After graduation she worked for the
YWCA The Young Women's Christian Association (YWCA) is a nonprofit organization with a focus on empowerment, leadership, and rights of women, young women, and girls in more than 100 countries. The World office is currently based in Geneva, Swit ...
and later taught at a school in
Short Hills, New Jersey Short Hills is an unincorporated community and census-designated place (CDP) situated within Millburn, in Essex County, within the U.S. state of New Jersey, and part of the New York metropolitan area. The community is a commuter town for resi ...
.


Marriage and career

The Burnham family spent summers in
Vermont Vermont () is a U.S. state, state in the New England region of the Northeastern United States. It borders Massachusetts to the south, New Hampshire to the east, New York (state), New York to the west, and the Provinces and territories of Ca ...
, where Dr. Burnham provided medical care to vacationers. Rogers Burnham, a younger brother of Lois, became friends with a local boy named Bill Wilson (William Griffith Wilson). Lois and Bill met in the summer of 1914, when Lois was 23 and Bill was 19. At that time, Lois was a college graduate and working with the YWCA. Bill was working his way through
Norwich University Norwich University is a private university in Northfield, Vermont, United States. The university was founded in 1819 as the "American Literary, Scientific and Military Academy". It is the oldest of six senior military college, senior militar ...
. The following summer they secretly became engaged. They married on January 24, 1918, in the New York Swedenborgian Church. At that time, Bill was in the
United States Army The United States Army (USA) is the primary Land warfare, land service branch of the United States Department of Defense. It is designated as the Army of the United States in the United States Constitution.Article II, section 2, clause 1 of th ...
and they wanted to marry before he was sent to the Western Front. Lois completed an occupational therapy training programme through the War Department. During Bill's absence and on and off afterwards, Lois worked at the
Walter Reed General Hospital The Walter Reed Army Medical Center (WRAMC), officially known as Walter Reed General Hospital (WRGH) until 1951, was the United States Army, U.S. Army's flagship medical center from 1909 to 2011. Located on in Washington, D.C., it served more ...
in the 'shell shock' ward for veterans; as a physical therapist at the Brooklyn Navy Hospital and as an
occupational therapist Occupational therapists (OTs) are health care professionals specializing in occupational therapy and occupational science. OTs and occupational therapy assistants (OTAs) use evidence-based practice, scientific bases and a Holism, holistic perspec ...
at
Bellevue Hospital Bellevue Hospital (officially NYC Health + Hospitals/Bellevue and formerly known as Bellevue Hospital Center) is a hospital in New York City and the oldest public hospital in the United States. One of the largest hospitals in the United States ...
, New York in the 1920s. After his return, the couple hoped to start a family, but after
ectopic pregnancies Ectopic pregnancy is a Complications of pregnancy, complication of pregnancy in which the embryo attaches outside the uterus. Signs and symptoms classically include abdominal pain and vaginal bleeding, but fewer than 50 percent of affected women ...
she was advised that pregnancy would be dangerous or impossible. Their attempts to adopt children were unsuccessful. Her marriage to Bill W. began to be challenging due to the combination of a series of ectopic pregnancies and his drinking problem. Lois began to work on programs to help families of alcoholics after Bill had gone through rehabilitation at Towns Hospital in 1934 and cofounded Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) in 1935. The same 12-Steps of recovery used by AA were adopted by Al-Anon
Al-Anon Al-Anon Family Groups, founded in 1951, is an international Mutual aid society, mutual aid organization for people who have been impacted by another person's alcoholism. In the organization's own words, Al-Anon is a "worldwide fellowship that offe ...
or Al-Anon Family Groups. Her autobiography, ''Lois Remembers'', was published in 1979. She died in 1988 at age 97, and is buried beside her husband in the East Dorset Cemetery in
East Dorset, Vermont East Dorset is an unincorporated community and census-designated place (CDP) in the town of Dorset, Bennington County, Vermont, United States. It was first listed as a CDP prior to the 2020 census. It is in northern Bennington County, in the ea ...
. Without children, she left
Stepping Stones Stepping stones or stepstones are sets of stones arranged to form an improvised causeway that allows a pedestrian to cross a natural watercourse such as a creek, a small river; or a water feature in a garden where water is allowed to flow betwe ...
, the family home, gardens, archives and a writing studio (nicknamed "Wit's End" and "The Shack") on 8.5 acres in
Bedford Hills, New York Bedford Hills is a hamlet and census-designated place (CDP) in the town of Bedford, Westchester County, New York, United States. The population was 3,001 at the 2010 census. Two New York State prisons for women, Bedford Hills Correction ...
that she and Bill had owned since 1941, to the nonprofit, tax-exempt privately run Stepping Stones Foundation. She served as Stepping Stones Foundation's first president from 1979 to 1988 and led its programs to increase education, awareness and prevention of alcoholism. Stepping Stones historic site is on the
National Register of Historic Places The National Register of Historic Places (NRHP) is the Federal government of the United States, United States federal government's official United States National Register of Historic Places listings, list of sites, buildings, structures, Hist ...
, was designated a National Historic Landmark in October 2012, and has become a tour destination for members of
12-step Twelve-step programs are international mutual aid programs supporting recovery from substance addictions, behavioral addictions and compulsions. Developed in the 1930s, the first twelve-step program, Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), founded by Bill ...
organizations, history buffs, and scholars and experts from many fields including those interested in alcoholism, history, spirituality, philosophy, pop culture, addiction, democracy and social movements. Her memoir "Lois Remembers" is published by Al-Anon Family Groups.


In popular culture

A 2010 made-for-TV movie based on her life, '' When Love Is Not Enough: The Lois Wilson Story'' featuring actress
Winona Ryder Winona Laura Horowitz (born ), known professionally as Winona Ryder, is an American actress. Having come to attention playing quirky characters in the late 1980s, she achieved success with her more dramatic performances in the 1990s. Ryder's L ...
as Lois Wilson, premiered on
Hallmark Hall of Fame ''Hallmark Hall of Fame'', originally called ''Hallmark Television Playhouse'', is an anthology program on American television, sponsored by Hallmark Cards, a Kansas City, Missouri, Kansas Citybased greeting card company. It is the longest-ru ...
on
CBS CBS Broadcasting Inc., commonly shortened to CBS (an abbreviation of its original name, Columbia Broadcasting System), is an American commercial broadcast television and radio network serving as the flagship property of the CBS Entertainme ...
April 25, 2010. The film is based on the 2005 book of the same name written by
William G. Borchert William G. Borchert (September 9, 1933 – October 1, 2022) was an American screenwriter and author who wrote the script for the 1989 film '' My Name is Bill W.'', based on the true story of Alcoholics Anonymous founder Bill Wilson. Borchert wa ...
, author of the screen play for the 1989 film '' My Name Is Bill W.'', based on the story of Alcoholics Anonymous founder Bill Wilson, in which she was portrayed by
JoBeth Williams Margaret JoBeth Williams (born December 6, 1948) is an American actress. She rose to prominence appearing in such films as '' Kramer vs. Kramer'' (1979), '' Stir Crazy'' (1980), ''Poltergeist'' (1982), '' The Big Chill'' (1983), '' The Day After' ...
. She was also featured in a 2012 part documentary biographical film '' Bill W.'', directed by Dan Carracino and Kevin Hanlon. An excerpt from a letter written by Lois W. and sent to her husband was sampled in the song "Adamord" by American ambient/drone duo
Stars of the Lid Stars of the Lid is an American ambient music project that formerly consisted of Brian McBride and Adam Wiltzie. The duo formed in Austin, Texas, in 1992. They have been acclaimed for their music incorporating droning, effects-treated guitars a ...
on the album
Music for Nitrous Oxide ''Music for Nitrous Oxide'' is the debut studio album released by Stars of the Lid on Sedimental Records in 1995. The album features minimal, droning compositions of varying length. The press release from Sedimental Records read: “Sedimental ...
.


See also

*
Al-Anon Al-Anon Family Groups, founded in 1951, is an international Mutual aid society, mutual aid organization for people who have been impacted by another person's alcoholism. In the organization's own words, Al-Anon is a "worldwide fellowship that offe ...
*
Stepping Stones Stepping stones or stepstones are sets of stones arranged to form an improvised causeway that allows a pedestrian to cross a natural watercourse such as a creek, a small river; or a water feature in a garden where water is allowed to flow betwe ...
, home of Lois and husband Bill W.


References


Works cited

*


General references

* Borchert, William. ''The Lois Wilson Story: When Love Is Not Enough''.
Hazelden The Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is an addiction treatment and advocacy organization that was created in 2014 with the merger of the Minnesota-based Hazelden Foundation and the Betty Ford Center in Rancho Mirage, California, in the United States ...
, 2005. * "Lois's Story", How Al-Anon Works for Families and Friends of Alcoholics. Virginia Beach, VA: Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc., 136–137. .


External links


A short biography
Stepping Stones
Bill W. – Famous, Yet Seldom Seen (Photo Feature)
''New York Times''
Lois Wilson
AA Agnostica {{DEFAULTSORT:W., Lois 1891 births 1988 deaths American Swedenborgians Alcoholics Anonymous People from Brooklyn Heights People from Katonah, New York Activists from New York (state) Occupational therapists