Jay's Journal
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''Jay's Journal'' is a 1979 book that was published in a diary format. The book is presented as an
autobiographical An autobiography, sometimes informally called an autobio, is a self-written account of one's own life, providing a personal narrative that reflects on the author's experiences, memories, and insights. This genre allows individuals to share thei ...
account of a depressed teenage boy who becomes involved with a Satanic group. After participating in several occult rituals, Jay believes he is being haunted by a
demon A demon is a malevolent supernatural entity. Historically, belief in demons, or stories about demons, occurs in folklore, mythology, religion, occultism, and literature; these beliefs are reflected in Media (communication), media including f ...
named "Raul." The book was edited and written by
Beatrice Sparks Beatrice Sparks, born Beatrice Ruby Mathews (January 15, 1917 – May 25, 2012) was an alleged Mormon youth counselor; more famously, she became an author and serial con artist, known primarily for producing books purporting to be the "real diari ...
, and is based partly on the life of 16-year-old Alden Barrett from
Pleasant Grove, Utah Pleasant Grove, originally named Battle Creek, is a city in Utah County, Utah, Utah County, Utah, United States, known as "Utah's City of Trees". It is part of the Provo, Utah, Provo–Orem, Utah, Orem Provo-Orem metropolitan area, Metropoli ...
, who died by suicide in 1971. Raul ended up possessing him and watching porn through his eyes and getting high on his soul due to the belief that Demons are the ones who chose to never have a body and were lied to by the devil, who was cast out of heaven on promises of a kingdom false and fell. Critics allege Sparks misrepresented Barrett's life and experiences.


Plot

In the mid-to-late 1970s, Jay is a religious, depressed teenager who begins a journal after being persuaded by his Sunday School teachers. Jay nicknames his diary
Judas Judas Iscariot (; ; died AD) was, according to Christianity's four canonical gospels, one of the original Twelve Apostles of Jesus Christ. Judas betrayed Jesus to the Sanhedrin in the Garden of Gethsemane, in exchange for thirty pieces of ...
and begins writing poetry venting his feelings about conformity, and discusses his parents, who he frequently gets in trouble with. He is friends with two boys named Brad and Dell, who he frequently discusses in his entries. Jay falls in love with a girl named Debbie Dale, and begins writing
ode An ode (from ) is a type of lyric poetry, with its origins in Ancient Greece. Odes are elaborately structured poems praising or glorifying an event or individual, describing nature intellectually as well as emotionally. A classic ode is structu ...
s to her in his journal. Brad and Dell discourage his crush on Debbie, though, because she is known to have dated a lot of boys. Regardless, his crush becomes gradually more intense, to the point where Jay copes with marijuana when Debbie goes to Phoenix with her parents for her birthday. For his fifteenth birthday, Jay's dad gives him a job at a pharmacy he works at. When Debbie returns from Phoenix, Jay begins a relationship with her and his infatuation grows. Debbie begins to ask him to lend her
amphetamine Amphetamine (contracted from Alpha and beta carbon, alpha-methylphenethylamine, methylphenethylamine) is a central nervous system (CNS) stimulant that is used in the treatment of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), narcolepsy, an ...
s from the pharmacy that he works at, and makes him cover up the theft by filling the capsules with powdered milk. Although feeling guilty about what he does, Jay is far too infatuated with Debbie to refuse, so he ignores his guilt and does so. Jay's guilt begins to worsen when he imagines scenarios of people being given the false, ineffective capsules to help their intense pain. He especially feels guilty after hearing about his Aunt Laurel being in intense pain from cancer, to the point where she was "crying and begging him ay's dadto give her something and make her die." His feelings towards Debbie become conflicted, and he tries to maintain his love for her. Jay is caught stealing drugs by his dad, who angrily fires him on the spot. The pharmacy begins to get into legal trouble, and Jay's dad calls the police and has Jay sent to a
juvenile detention center In criminal justice systems, a youth detention center, known as a juvenile detention center (JDC),Stahl, Dean, Karen Kerchelich, and Ralph De Sola. ''Abbreviations Dictionary''. CRC Press, 20011202. Retrieved 23 August 2010. , . juvenile det ...
. Jay, who is still writing in his journal, expresses regret over his crimes and reminisces about life with Brad and Dell. He is delighted by the frequent letters that Debbie sends, but then Debbie stops writing to him and they break up, leaving Jay distraught. Jay eventually meets Pete, who appears different to him. Pete introduces him to matters relating to the
occult The occult () is a category of esoteric or supernatural beliefs and practices which generally fall outside the scope of organized religion and science, encompassing phenomena involving a 'hidden' or 'secret' agency, such as magic and mysti ...
. In further detail, Jay writes, Jay is confused by Pete, but eventually claims to witness Pete move a chair with "mental powers" and make a wart on his finger disappear. He finds himself drawn to Pete, who teaches him and some other boys about different aforementioned topics. He writes about liaisons between him and Pete in which they discuss auras and psychic selves. Eventually, Pete begins giving Jay herbs that make him have strange yet alluring dreams. Jay is upset when he is informed that he will soon be released from the detention center, but his perspective on his family soon improves, and he begins missing them and anticipating arriving home. Jay is released into the custody of his parents, but finds that his home life is unexciting with all of the conditions. At a dinner with his cousins, he tries to explain the topics that Pete taught him about, but he is shut down. Upset, he renounces his faith and strives to see Pete again. He goes hitchhiking to reunite with Pete, who tells him to invite his friends to a group that he is creating. Jay ends up grounded by his parents. At school, Jay tries to explain Pete's teachings to Brad and Dell, who laugh at him. Jay becomes hypnotized by Pete's teachings, but decides that he needs to get his life together, beginning with getting a job. Jay's dad gives him a job at a stationery store, but Jay feels bored of his life. Jay, Brad, and Dell are eventually roped in by missionaries sent by Pete, who gives them a list of kids to try to bring into the cult. Jay begins to hang out with members of the cult, and has fun with them. Jay has many romantic interests throughout the story, particularly one with a girl named Janie, who spurns him after he refuses to go to a dance with her. Jay's faith becomes conflicted with the introduction of Satanism. He eventually meets a girl named Tina, who becomes interested in him. They begin having liaisons, and Jay begins to fall in love with her. Tina brings him further and further into the Satanic lifestyle, where she encourages him to take drugs and participate in
orgies An orgy is a sex party where guests freely engage in open and unrestrained sexual activity or group sex. Swingers' parties do not always conform to this designation, because at many swinger parties the sexual partners may all know each other o ...
, often with animals. When Jay decides to step away from the rituals and break up with Tina, she convinces him with witchcraft to stay with her. The two of them decide to "get married" in a graveyard, where a kitten is strangled on the altar they use. After the wedding, Jay's lifestyle becomes more reckless when he and Tina begin attacking cattle and bathing in blood to baptize themselves. Jay's writing and poems begin to become more and more unhinged. Eventually, Jay decides to participate in his school's production of ''
Barefoot in the Park ''Barefoot in the Park'' is a romantic comedy stage play by Neil Simon. The play premiered on Broadway in 1963, starring Robert Redford and Elizabeth Ashley. It was made into a film in 1967, which starred Redford and Jane Fonda. Productions ...
''. Another student takes the role that Jay wanted, but then the student's appendix bursts, leaving the role open. Jay suspects that Tina may have something to do with the incident, and eventually the two of them break up when one of Tina's ex-boyfriends contact her, which leaves Jay heartbroken once more. Eventually, Jay has visions of a demon named Raul and believes he has been possessed by Raul. Both Brad and Dell later die in car accidents, seemingly linked to the occult's practices, and Jay becomes sick when he goes to their funerals. When Jay's little brother Chad becomes unnerved and tells Jay that he does not recognize him, Jay determines that he does not feel in control of his body. In one final attempt to save himself from Raul, he decides to contact the Bishop for an exorcism. He writes a note to his parents, requesting that all his possessions be given to Debbie as a wedding gift. The story ends with an epilogue in the form of a letter written by Jay's mom addressed to Janie. She writes that they found Jay dead, having
killed himself Suicide is the act of intentionally causing one's own death. Risk factors for suicide include mental disorders, physical disorders, and substance abuse. Some suicides are impulsive acts driven by stress (such as from financial or acad ...
from a gunshot to the head. Devastated, she reflects on his life and celebrates the sixteen and a half years he lived.


Response

Some critics have challenged the authenticity of the story, noting that the editor of this book,
Beatrice Sparks Beatrice Sparks, born Beatrice Ruby Mathews (January 15, 1917 – May 25, 2012) was an alleged Mormon youth counselor; more famously, she became an author and serial con artist, known primarily for producing books purporting to be the "real diari ...
, has filled the same role on many other "actual, anonymous diaries of teenagers" that explore such sensational themes as
drug addiction Addiction is a neuropsychological disorder characterized by a persistent and intense urge to use a drug or engage in a behavior that produces natural reward, despite substantial harm and other negative consequences. Repetitive drug use can ...
,
teenage pregnancy Teenage pregnancy, also known as adolescent pregnancy, is pregnancy in a female under the age of 20. Worldwide, pregnancy complications are the leading cause of death for women and girls 15 to 19 years old. The definition of teenage pregnancy i ...
, and
prostitution Prostitution is a type of sex work that involves engaging in sexual activity in exchange for payment. The definition of "sexual activity" varies, and is often defined as an activity requiring physical contact (e.g., sexual intercourse, no ...
. These books, the most well-known of which is ''
Go Ask Alice ''Go Ask Alice'' is a 1971 book about a teenage girl who develops a drug addiction at age 15 and runs away from home on a journey of self-destructive escapism. Attributed to "Anonymous", the book is in diary form, and was originally presented ...
'', serve as cautionary tales. Alden Barrett was a teenager who died by suicide in 1971. According to a book written by Alden Barrett's brother Scott (''A Place in the Sun: The Truth Behind Jay's Journal'') and interviews with the Barrett family, Sparks used 21 entries of 212 total from Barrett's actual journal. The other entries were fictional, with Sparks claiming they were based on case histories from other teenagers Sparks worked with and interviews of friends and acquaintances of Barrett. Within the city of Pleasant Grove, ''Jay's Journal'' has been the source of many
urban legends Urban legend (sometimes modern legend, urban myth, or simply legend) is a genre of folklore concerning stories about an unusual (usually scary) or humorous event that many people believe to be true but largely are not. These legends can be e ...
, including alleged locations where Jay performed actions described in the book, his home, the effect on his family after his death, and other rumors. In 2004, a local Salt Lake City paper, City Weekly, ran a story containing interviews with the Barrett family and their friends. Apart from pointing out the book's untruths, its authors assert that, ironically, the book ''Jay's Journal'' actually inspired imitative acts of what readers took to be Satanic rituals. Due to allegations of ritual
cattle mutilation Cattle mutilation is the killing and mutilation of cattle under supposedly unusual, usually bloodless circumstances. Reportedly removed parts often include an ear, eyeball, jaw flesh, tongue, lymph nodes, genitals and rectum. Reports began in t ...
arising in ''Jay's Journal'', the book came to the attention of
Royal Canadian Mounted Police The Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP; , GRC) is the Law enforcement in Canada, national police service of Canada. The RCMP is an agency of the Government of Canada; it also provides police services under contract to 11 Provinces and terri ...
officers investigating reports of killed and mutilated cows in
Alberta Alberta is a Provinces and territories of Canada, province in Canada. It is a part of Western Canada and is one of the three Canadian Prairies, prairie provinces. Alberta is bordered by British Columbia to its west, Saskatchewan to its east, t ...
.


Adaptations

A
rock opera A rock opera is a collection of rock music songs with lyrics that relate to a common story. Rock operas are typically released as concept albums and are not scripted for acting, which distinguishes them from operas, although several have been ad ...
titled ''A Place in the Sun'' was created and performed in 1997 and 1998 by Utah band Grain, led by Bryan Hall. According to some of Alden's family members, it was a more accurate portrayal and showed Sparks' alleged exploitation of the story. In 2022 and 2023, Hall and his band, Bay of Pigs, began live performances of another rock opera telling Alden Barrett's story. It is called ''Pleasant Grove'' and was performed as a work-in-progress in Utah at the Springville Utah Rivoli theater in two runs during 2023. The band at the heart of its creation, Bay of Pigs, has plans to continue developing the project for other performances.Salt Lake Tribune: How Utah Teen's Death Inspired...
''Salt Lake Tribune'' article from 2022 noting development of ''Pleasant Grove'' rock opera. Accessed 2/19/2024.


References


External links


Blog entry
on the "
Mormon Mormons are a religious and cultural group related to Mormonism, the principal branch of the Latter Day Saint movement started by Joseph Smith in upstate New York during the 1820s. After Smith's death in 1844, the movement split into several ...
Horror Fiction" of Jay's Journal
Review of Grain's ''A Place in the Sun'' rock opera

Debunking
by
Snopes ''Snopes'' (), formerly known as the ''Urban Legends Reference Pages'', is a fact-checking website. It has been described as a "well-regarded reference for sorting out myths and rumors" on the Internet. The site has also been seen as a source ...
of the anti-drug tale ''
Go Ask Alice ''Go Ask Alice'' is a 1971 book about a teenage girl who develops a drug addiction at age 15 and runs away from home on a journey of self-destructive escapism. Attributed to "Anonymous", the book is in diary form, and was originally presented ...
'', also written by
Beatrice Sparks Beatrice Sparks, born Beatrice Ruby Mathews (January 15, 1917 – May 25, 2012) was an alleged Mormon youth counselor; more famously, she became an author and serial con artist, known primarily for producing books purporting to be the "real diari ...
. {{Authority control 1978 books Fictional diaries Works by Beatrice Sparks Written fiction presented as fact Novels about Satanism