A term of endearment is a word or phrase used to address or describe a person, animal or inanimate object for which the speaker feels

love Love encompasses a range of strong and positive emotional and mental states, from the most sublime virtue or good habit, the deepest Interpersonal relationship, interpersonal affection, to the simplest pleasure. An example of this range of ...

affection Affection or fondness is a "disposition or state of mind or body" that is often associated with a feeling or type of love. It has given rise to a number of branches of philosophy and psychology concerning emotion, disease, influence, and sta ...

. Terms of endearment are used for a variety of reasons, such as parents addressing their

children A child ( : children) is a human being between the stages of birth and puberty, or between the developmental period of infancy and puberty. The legal definition of ''child'' generally refers to a minor, otherwise known as a person younger ...

and lovers addressing each other.

Etymology

Such words may not in their original use bear any resemblance in meaning to the meaning attached when used as a term of endearment, for example calling a significant other "pumpkin". Some words are clearly derived from each other, such as "sweetheart" and "sweetie", while others bear no etymological resemblance, such as "baby", "babe", and "cutie". "Honey" has been documented as a term of endearment from at least the 14th century. "Baby" was first used in 1839 and "sugar" only appeared as recently as 1930.

Usage

Each term of endearment has its own connotations, which are highly dependent on the situation they are used in, such as tone of voice, body language, and social context. Saying "Hey baby, you're looking good" varies greatly from the use "Baby, don't swim at the deep end of the pool!" Certain terms can be perceived as offensive or patronizing, depending on the context and speaker. Feminists have complained that while 'terms of endearment are words used by close friends, families, and lovers...they are also used on women by perfect strangers...

double standard A double standard is the application of different sets of principles for situations that are, in principle, the same. It is often used to describe treatment whereby one group is given more latitude than another. A double standard arises when two ...

' – because 'between strangers terms of endearment imply a judgment of incompetence on the part of the target'. Others have pointed out however that, in an informal setting like a pub, 'the use of terms of endearment here was a positive politeness strategy. A term like "mate", or "sweetie", shifts the focus of the request away from its imposition...toward the camaraderie existing between interlocutors'. Terms of endearment often 'make use of internal rhyme... ithstill current forms such as lovey-dovey, which appeared in 1819, and honey bunny', or of other duplications. Some such combinations seem nonsensical, odd, or too long, however, such as ''baby pie'' or ''love dear'', and are seldom used. Terms of endearment can lose their original meaning over the course of time: thus for example 'in the early twentieth century the word '' crumpet'' was used as a term of endearment by both sexes', before diminishing later into a 'term of objectification' for women. When proper names escape one, terms of endearment can always substitute. This is described by the psychoanalyst

Jacques Lacan Jacques Marie Émile Lacan (, , ; 13 April 1901 – 9 September 1981) was a French psychoanalyst and psychiatrist. Described as "the most controversial psycho-analyst since Freud", Lacan gave yearly seminars in Paris from 1953 to 1981, and ...

: The 'opacity of the ejaculations of love, when, lacking a signifier to name the object of its epithalamium, it employs the crudest trickery of the imaginary. "I'll eat you up....Sweetie!" "You'll love it...Rat!". Psychiatrist

Eric Berne Eric Berne (May 10, 1910 – July 15, 1970) was a Canadian-born psychiatrist who created the theory of transactional analysis as a way of explaining human behavior. Berne's theory of transactional analysis was based on the ideas of Freud ...

identified the marital

game A game is a structured form of play, usually undertaken for entertainment or fun, and sometimes used as an educational tool. Many games are also considered to be work (such as professional players of spectator sports or games) or art (suc ...

of "Sweetheart", where 'White makes a subtly derogatory remark about Mrs White, disguised as anecdote, and ends: "Isn't that right, sweetheart?" Mrs. White tends to agree...because it would seem surly to disagree with a man who calls one "sweetheart" in public'. Berne points out that 'the more tense the situation, and the closer the game is to exposure, the more bitterly is the word "sweetheart" enunciated'; while the wife's antithesis is either 'to reply: "Yes, ''honey''!"' or to 'respond with a similar "Sweetheart" type anecdote about the husband, saying in effect, "You have a dirty face too, dear"'. French has all kinds of interesting terms of endearment, including a rather odd assortment of barnyard animals...

ike Ike or IKE may refer to: People * Ike (given name), a list of people with the name or nickname * Dwight D. Eisenhower (1890–1969), Supreme Commander of the Allied forces in Europe during World War II and President of the United States Surname * ...

mon canard (my duck)' – something which may be compared to the British 'baby talk...duckie'.

Literary anecdotes

* In C. P. Snow's ''Last Things'', the narrator's wife, faced with their son's unconventional marriage, turns to her husband and says: " 'Tell me, Lewis' (actually she used a pet name which meant she needed me) 'is that a real marriage?' " *

Virginia Woolf Adeline Virginia Woolf (; ; 25 January 1882 28 March 1941) was an English writer, considered one of the most important modernist 20th-century authors and a pioneer in the use of stream of consciousness as a narrative device. Woolf was born ...

– 'Mandril or Marmoset for Leonard' her husband – wrote 'the story "Lappin and Lapinova", published in 1938, which describes the death of a marriage when the erotic, escapist fantasy of the animal names is cruelly killed off by the husband'.Hermione Lee, ''Virginia Woolf'' (London 1996) p. 111-2

Etymology

Usage

Literary anecdotes

See also

References

Further reading