Journals (Cobain)
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''Journals'' is a collection of writings and drawings by American musician Kurt Cobain, who was the lead singer and guitarist of Nirvana. Though the content is undated, it is arranged in approximately chronological order. It was published in hardcover by Riverhead Books in November 2002, and in
paperback A paperback (softcover, softback) book is one with a thick paper or paperboard cover, and often held together with glue rather than stitches or staples. In contrast, hardcover (hardback) books are bound with cardboard covered with cloth, ...
by Riverhead Books in November 2003. ''Journals'' opened at No. 1 on the ''New York Times'' bestseller list (non-fiction). It contains scrawled notes, drafted letters, shopping lists, and drawings by Cobain.


Release

''Journals'' was released one month after the release of the self-titled greatest hits album, '' Nirvana'', in 2002, Cobain's band before he had committed suicide in 1994. '' Billboard'' thus described the book as a "music driven blockbuster" with a first printing of nearly 375,000 copies.


Letters

''Journals'' contains a number of letters, either early drafts or unsent, that Cobain wrote to friends or peers. Included are friendly letters to Dale Crover of the Melvins,
Tobi Vail Tobi Celeste Vail (born July 20, 1969) is an American independent musician, music critic and feminist activist from Olympia, Washington. She was a central figure in the riot grrl scene—she coined the spelling of "grrl"—and she started the zi ...
of Bikini Kill and
Eugene Kelly Eugene Kelly (born 9 August 1965) Eugene Kelly allmusic biography. is a Scottish musician who is a member of the group The Vaselines, a founding member of the now disbanded Eugenius and has had a number of solo releases. Eugene Kelly formed The ...
of
the Vaselines The Vaselines are a Scottish alternative rock band. Formed in Glasgow, Scotland in 1986, the band was originally a duo between its songwriters Eugene Kelly and Frances McKee, but later added James Seenan and Eugene's brother Charlie Kelly on b ...
, a tender letter to his wife,
Courtney Love Courtney Michelle Love (née Harrison; born July 9, 1964) is an American singer, guitarist, songwriter, and actress. A figure in the alternative and grunge scenes of the 1990s, her career has spanned four decades. She rose to prominence as ...
, a letter thanking '' The Advocate'' following his interview with the gay and lesbian magazine in early 1992, and even a letter to Simon Fair Timony, the then-nine-year-old stepson of Half Japanese member Jad Fair, asking him to contribute artwork for what would become ''
In Utero ''In Utero'' is the third and final studio album by American rock band Nirvana. It was released on September 21, 1993, by DGC Records. After breaking into the mainstream with their second album, ''Nevermind'' (1991), Nirvana hired Steve Albin ...
''. It also includes a letter from Cobain and Nirvana bassist
Krist Novoselic Krist Anthony Novoselic (; ; born May 16, 1965) is an American musician and activist. He was the bassist and co-founder of the rock band Nirvana. Novoselic and Kurt Cobain formed the band Nirvana in 1987 along with drummer Aaron Burckhard, wh ...
firing then-drummer Dave Foster from the band, and angry letters from Cobain to MTV and ''
Rolling Stone ''Rolling Stone'' is an American monthly magazine that focuses on music, politics, and popular culture. It was founded in San Francisco, California, in 1967 by Jann Wenner, and the music critic Ralph J. Gleason. It was first known for its ...
''.


Lists

Like many music fans, Cobain often made lists of his favorite bands and albums, several of which are included in ''Journals''. His lists included artists from
indie Indie is a short form of "independence" or "independent"; it may refer to: Arts, entertainment, and media Gaming *Independent video game development, video games created without financial backing from large companies *Indie game, any game (board ...
and
alternative rock Alternative rock, or alt-rock, is a category of rock music that emerged from the independent music underground of the 1970s and became widely popular in the 1990s. "Alternative" refers to the genre's distinction from mainstream or commerci ...
(
the Vaselines The Vaselines are a Scottish alternative rock band. Formed in Glasgow, Scotland in 1986, the band was originally a duo between its songwriters Eugene Kelly and Frances McKee, but later added James Seenan and Eugene's brother Charlie Kelly on b ...
,
Pixies A pixie (also pisky, pixy, pixi, pizkie, and piskie in Cornwall and Devon, and pigsie or puggsy in the New Forest) is a mythical creature of British folklore. Pixies are considered to be particularly concentrated in the high moorland areas aro ...
,
the Breeders The Breeders are an American alternative rock band based in Dayton, Ohio, consisting of members Kim Deal (rhythm guitar, lead vocals), her twin sister Kelley Deal (lead guitar, vocals), Josephine Wiggs (bass guitar, vocals) and Jim Macpherso ...
, Sonic Youth,
R.E.M. R.E.M. was an American rock band from Athens, Georgia, formed in 1980 by drummer Bill Berry, guitarist Peter Buck, bassist Mike Mills, and lead vocalist Michael Stipe, who were students at the University of Georgia. One of the first alternati ...
, PJ Harvey,
Meat Puppets Meat Puppets are an American rock band formed in January 1980 in Phoenix, Arizona. The group's original lineup was Curt Kirkwood (guitar/vocals), his brother Cris Kirkwood (bass guitar/vocals), and Derrick Bostrom (drums). The Kirkwood brothe ...
, Pavement); protopunk, punk rock and
hardcore Hardcore, hard core or hard-core may refer to: Arts and media Film * ''Hardcore'' (1977 film), a British comedy film * ''Hardcore'' (1979 film), an American crime drama film starring George C Scott * ''Hardcore'' (2001 film), a British documen ...
(
the Stooges The Stooges, originally billed as the Psychedelic Stooges, also known as Iggy and the Stooges, was an American rock band formed in Ann Arbor, Michigan, in 1967 by singer Iggy Pop, guitarist Ron Asheton, drummer Scott Asheton, and bassist Da ...
,
the Velvet Underground The Velvet Underground was an American rock band formed in New York City in 1964. The original line-up consisted of singer/guitarist Lou Reed, multi-instrumentalist John Cale, guitarist Sterling Morrison, and drummer Angus MacLise. MacLise ...
, Butthole Surfers, Sex Pistols,
the Clash The Clash were an English rock band formed in London in 1976 who were key players in the original wave of British punk rock. Billed as "The Only Band That Matters", they also contributed to the and new wave movements that emerged in the w ...
,
the Slits The Slits were a punk and post-punk band based in London, formed there in 1976 by members of the groups the Flowers of Romance and the Castrators. The group's early line-up consisted of Ari Up (Ariane Forster) and Palmolive (a.k.a. Paloma R ...
, the Saints, Black Flag,
Bad Brains Bad Brains are an American rock band formed in Washington, D.C. in 1976. Originally a jazz fusion band under the name Mind Power, they are widely regarded as pioneers of hardcore punk, though the band's members have objected to the use of this t ...
,
Fear Fear is an intensely unpleasant emotion in response to perceiving or recognizing a danger or threat. Fear causes physiological changes that may produce behavioral reactions such as mounting an aggressive response or fleeing the threat. Fear ...
,
Minor Threat Minor Threat was an American hardcore punk band, formed in 1980 in Washington, D.C. by vocalist Ian MacKaye and drummer Jeff Nelson. MacKaye and Nelson had played in several other bands together, and recruited bassist Brian Baker and guitar ...
, the Faith,
Rites of Spring Rites of Spring was an American punk rock band from Washington, D.C., formed in late 1983. Along with Embrace, and Beefeater, they were one of the mainstay acts of the 1985 Revolution Summer movement Andersen, Mark; Jenkins, Mark (Soft Skull ...
, Flipper, Fang); hip-hop (
Public Enemy "Public enemy" is a term which was first widely used in the United States in the 1930s to describe individuals whose activities were seen as criminal and extremely damaging to society, though the phrase had been used for centuries to describe ...
,
N.W.A N.W.A (an abbreviation for Niggaz Wit Attitudes) was an American hip hop group whose members were among the earliest and most significant popularizers and controversial figures of the gangsta rap subgenre, and the group is widely considered ...
); blues ( Lead Belly); and hard rock and
metal A metal (from Greek μέταλλον ''métallon'', "mine, quarry, metal") is a material that, when freshly prepared, polished, or fractured, shows a lustrous appearance, and conducts electricity and heat relatively well. Metals are typicall ...
(
Black Sabbath Black Sabbath were an English rock music, rock band formed in Birmingham in 1968 by guitarist Tony Iommi, drummer Bill Ward (musician), Bill Ward, bassist Geezer Butler and vocalist Ozzy Osbourne. They are often cited as pioneers of heavy met ...
's ''
Master of Reality ''Master of Reality'' is the third studio album by English heavy metal band Black Sabbath, released on 21 July 1971 by Vertigo Records. It is regarded by some critics as the foundation of doom metal, stoner rock, and sludge metal. Taylor 2006, ...
'',
Led Zeppelin Led Zeppelin were an English rock band formed in London in 1968. The group comprised vocalist Robert Plant, guitarist Jimmy Page, bassist/keyboardist John Paul Jones, and drummer John Bonham. With a heavy, guitar-driven sound, they are ci ...
, AC/DC,). On his "Top 50" albums list, offerings from such obscure artists as
the Shaggs The Shaggs were an American rock band formed in Fremont, New Hampshire, in 1965. The band was composed of the sisters Dorothy "Dot" Wiggin (vocals and lead guitar), Betty Wiggin (vocals and rhythm guitar), Helen Wiggin (drums) and, later, Rac ...
, Tales of Terror,
Marine Girls Marine Girls were an English post-punk group from Hatfield, Hertfordshire, England. The group was formed in 1980, by two sixth form schoolfriends; Tracey Thorn and Gina Hartman. Originally, Thorn just played guitar and Hartman was the lead voca ...
,
Swans Swans are birds of the family Anatidae within the genus ''Cygnus''. The swans' closest relatives include the geese and ducks. Swans are grouped with the closely related geese in the subfamily Anserinae where they form the tribe Cygnini. Someti ...
and
the Frogs ''The Frogs'' ( grc-gre, Βάτραχοι, Bátrakhoi, Frogs; la, Ranae, often abbreviated ''Ran.'' or ''Ra.'') is a comedy written by the Ancient Greek playwright Aristophanes. It was performed at the Lenaia, one of the Festivals of Dionysus in ...
coexist with albums by
the Beatles The Beatles were an English rock band, formed in Liverpool in 1960, that comprised John Lennon, Paul McCartney, George Harrison and Ringo Starr. They are regarded as the most influential band of all time and were integral to the developmen ...
,
David Bowie David Robert Jones (8 January 194710 January 2016), known professionally as David Bowie ( ), was an English singer-songwriter and actor. A leading figure in the music industry, he is regarded as one of the most influential musicians of the ...
, and Aerosmith. The 1973 Stooges record ''
Raw Power ''Raw Power'' is the third studio album by American rock band the Stooges (credited as Iggy and the Stooges), released on February 7, 1973 by Columbia Records. The album departed from the "groove-ridden, feel-based songs" of the band's first two ...
'' is listed at No. 1 on all of Cobain's "favorite album" lists. He also noted an interest in grunge and the Seattle Sound ( Melvins,
Green River Green River may refer to: Rivers Canada * Green River (British Columbia), a tributary of the Lillooet River *Green River, a tributary of the Saint John River, also known by its French name of Rivière Verte *Green River (Ontario), a tributary of ...
, Mudhoney,
Screaming Trees Screaming Trees was an American rock band formed in Ellensburg, Washington, in 1984 by vocalist Mark Lanegan, guitarist Gary Lee Conner, bass player Van Conner, and drummer Mark Pickerel. Pickerel had been replaced by Barrett Martin by the time ...
, early
Soundgarden Soundgarden was an American rock band formed in Seattle, Washington, in 1984 by singer and drummer Chris Cornell, lead guitarist Kim Thayil (both of whom are the only members to appear in every incarnation of the band), and bassist Hiro Yama ...
).


Nirvana-related writings

Contained in ''Journals'' is an assortment of directly Nirvana-related material, including embryonic lyric drafts, early album tracklists, and even a set of unused
liner notes Liner notes (also sleeve notes or album notes) are the writings found on the sleeves of LP record albums and in booklets that come inserted into the compact disc jewel case or the equivalent packaging for cassettes. Origin Liner notes are desc ...
Cobain had apparently written for ''In Utero'' in 1993. The lyric sheets are especially revealing, showing that some songs, including the band's biggest hit "
Smells Like Teen Spirit "Smells Like Teen Spirit" is a song by the American rock band Nirvana. It is the opening track and lead single from the band's second album, ''Nevermind'' (1991), released on DGC Records. The unexpected success of the song propelled ''Neve ...
", underwent major revisions before being recorded for release, while others, such as " Come as You Are", were changed very little, at least from the drafts included. The tracklists are also of interest, revealing, for example, that Cobain had intended to release "girl" and "boy" sides of Nirvana's breakthrough album ''
Nevermind ''Nevermind'' is the second studio album by the American rock band Nirvana, released on September 24, 1991, by DGC Records. It was Nirvana's first release on a major label and the first to feature drummer Dave Grohl. Produced by Butch Vig, '' ...
'', with songs such as "
In Bloom "In Bloom" is a song by American rock band Nirvana, written by vocalist and guitarist Kurt Cobain. It appears as the second track on the band's second album, ''Nevermind'', released by DGC Records in September 1991. The album version is the se ...
" and "
Lithium Lithium (from el, λίθος, lithos, lit=stone) is a chemical element with the symbol Li and atomic number 3. It is a soft, silvery-white alkali metal. Under standard conditions, it is the least dense metal and the least dense solid ...
" on the girl side, and songs like " Sliver" and "
Polly Polly is a given name, most often feminine, which originated as a variant of Molly (name), Molly (a diminutive of Mary (name), Mary). Polly may also be a short form of names such as Polina (given name), Polina, Polona (given name), Polona, Paula (g ...
" on the boy side.


Drawings

''Journals'' contains a number of Cobain's rough sketches and drawings, some of which are light and humorous, such as his drawing of "
Eddie Eddie or Eddy may refer to: Science and technology *Eddy (fluid dynamics), the swirling of a fluid and the reverse current created when the fluid flows past an obstacle * Eddie (text editor), a text editor originally for BeOS and now ported to Lin ...
", the
Iron Maiden Iron Maiden are an English heavy metal band formed in Leyton, East London, in 1975 by bassist and primary songwriter Steve Harris. While fluid in the early years of the band, the lineup for most of the band's history has consisted of Harri ...
mascot, his sketch of the band as
choir A choir ( ; also known as a chorale or chorus) is a musical ensemble of singers. Choral music, in turn, is the music written specifically for such an ensemble to perform. Choirs may perform music from the classical music repertoire, which sp ...
boys on a hypothetical Nirvana album cover, and his drawing of "Elvis Cooper", in which
Elvis Presley Elvis Aaron Presley (January 8, 1935 – August 16, 1977), or simply Elvis, was an American singer and actor. Dubbed the "Honorific nicknames in popular music, King of Rock and Roll", he is regarded as Cultural impact of Elvis Presley, one ...
and
Alice Cooper Alice Cooper (born Vincent Damon Furnier, February 4, 1948) is an American rock singer whose career spans over five decades. With a raspy voice and a stage show that features numerous props and stage illusions, including pyrotechnics, guillot ...
are combined into a single entity, but many of which are darker or more violent. Included in the latter are his drawings of a sniper shooting members of the swastika-toting Ku Klux Klan from a rooftop (with swastikas drawn backwards), his drawing of a soldier with a football helmet hanging from a noose, and a sketch of his own
emaciated Emaciation is defined as the state of extreme thinness from absence of body fat and muscle wasting usually resulting from malnutrition. Characteristics In humans, the physical appearance of emaciation includes thinned limbs, pronounced and protrud ...
body, as well as a comic strip called "Mr. Moustache", in which an unborn child kicks through its mother's belly to kill its
macho Machismo (; ; ; ) is the sense of being " manly" and self-reliant, a concept associated with "a strong sense of masculine pride: an exaggerated masculinity". Machismo is a term originating in the early 1930s and 1940s best defined as hav ...
father, which arguably influenced the song of the same title off of Nirvana's first album, '' Bleach''. The strip was first published in Michael Azerrad's 1993 Nirvana biography, ''Come as You Are''. ''Journals'' also contains a number of drawings of images which would later become a familiar part of Nirvana lore, such as
Dante's Dante's is a nightclub and live music venue in Portland, Oregon. The venue, located along West Burnside Street and owned by Frank Faillace, hosts a variety of acts ranging from burlesque to rock music. Dante's is housed in an unreinforced masonr ...
Vestibule of Hell (which appeared on a Nirvana t-shirt), a skinny man on a cross (which appeared in the "
Heart-Shaped Box "Heart-Shaped Box" is a song by the American rock band Nirvana, written by vocalist and guitarist, Kurt Cobain. It appears as the third track on the band's third and final studio album, ''In Utero'', released by DGC Records in September 1993 ...
" music video), and male
seahorse A seahorse (also written ''sea-horse'' and ''sea horse'') is any of 46 species of small marine fish in the genus ''Hippocampus''. "Hippocampus" comes from the Ancient Greek (), itself from () meaning "horse" and () meaning "sea monster" or " ...
s giving birth (which appeared on the cover of the "
All Apologies "All Apologies" is a song by American rock band Nirvana, written by vocalist and guitarist, Kurt Cobain. It appears as the 12th track on the band's third and final studio album, '' In Utero'', released by DGC Records in September 1993. The song ...
"/ "
Rape Me "Rape Me" is a song by the American rock band Nirvana, written by vocalist and guitarist Kurt Cobain. It is the fourth song on the band's third and final studio album, ''In Utero'', released in September 1993. "Rape Me" was released as the alb ...
" single).


Entries about his health

Throughout his life, Cobain was physically fragile and sickly; suffering from scoliosis, undiagnosed stomach ailments (which some argue led to his heroin
addiction Addiction is a neuropsychological disorder characterized by a persistent and intense urge to engage in certain behaviors, one of which is the usage of a drug, despite substantial harm and other negative consequences. Repetitive drug use o ...
), and a touring schedule that required him to spend hours each night singing, screaming and stage diving.Wood, Jessica L. "Pained Expression: Metaphors of Sickness and Signs of 'Authenticity' in Kurt Cobain's 'Journals.'" ''Popular Music,'' vol. 30, no. 3, 2011, pp. 331-349. ''JSTOR,'' JSTOR, www.jstor.org/stable/23359907. On top of his physical issues, he was diagnosed with clinical depression during his teenage years. In his private journals, that were later published after his death, Cobain details the horrific stomach pain he experienced. He says that eating was always followed by a relentless, "burning nauseous pain in the upper part of isstomach lining".Cobain, Kurt. ''Journals''. Riverhead Books, 2003. He writes that the pain would, at times, leave him crunched up in his bathroom floor, paralyzed by the discomfort, continuously regurgitating nothing but blood and water. Though the root of his gastrointestinal issues was never determined, and close friends of Cobain argue that it was simply an excuse for his heroin habit, no one can deny the fact that he suffered tremendously. Other bandmates have later recalled Cobain's strange fascination with bodily functions. During a 1989 Nirvana tour, one of the band's singers, Tad Doyle, suffered from daily
nausea Nausea is a diffuse sensation of unease and discomfort, sometimes perceived as an urge to vomit. While not painful, it can be a debilitating symptom if prolonged and has been described as placing discomfort on the chest, abdomen, or back of the ...
and vomiting episodes; Kurt Danielson, a close friend of Doyle's, recalls that Cobain would voluntarily hold a bucket for Doyle to vomit into and often appeared excited to see the end result.Cross, Charles R. ''Heavier Than Heaven: a Biography of Kurt Cobain.''Hachette Books, 2001. Danielson remembers that Cobain admired Doyle for his struggle, and viewed his sickness as artistic and authentic. Cobain's obsession with bodily fluids can be more publicly seen in his graphic song lyrics; from sex, to urination, to vomiting, almost 90% of his songs and art were somehow influenced by the human body. In his journal entries, Cobain would often misspell words and put an anatomical twist on his spelling of a word.


Reception

''
Seattle Weekly The ''Seattle Weekly'' is an alternative biweekly distributed newspaper in Seattle, Washington, United States. It was founded by Darrell Oldham and David Brewster as ''The Weekly.'' Its first issue was published on March 31, 1976. The newspaper ...
'' said this: "The journals are like an exploded diagram of a tormented soul, a maelstrom of self-pity, intolerant pride, morbid introspection, ingenious self-delusion, merciless self-knowledge, showbiz revulsion, starstruck effusion,
Faust Faust is the protagonist of a classic German legend based on the historical Johann Georg Faust ( 1480–1540). The erudite Faust is highly successful yet dissatisfied with his life, which leads him to make a pact with the Devil at a crossroa ...
ian ambition, otherworldly detachment, and an iron will helpless to help itself. Packed into 280 pages are shocking confessions, sweetly eloquent letters to brilliant friends, hard-nosed band plans, fulminating political screeds, obscene cartoons, haunting video treatments, and lyrical poetry of tremulous Romantic sensitivity, Bukowskian crudity,
dada Dada () or Dadaism was an art movement of the European avant-garde in the early 20th century, with early centres in Zürich, Switzerland, at the Cabaret Voltaire (in 1916). New York Dada began c. 1915, and after 1920 Dada flourished in Pari ...
ist flippancy, and modernist opacity." Furthermore, its release reportedly polarized fans, some of whom felt it constituted an invasion of Cobain's privacy, and others of whom saw it as a unique opportunity to better understand him. '' Billboard'' reported that the simultaneous release of the ''Nirvana'' hits set helped fire cross-promotion at retail and that the album release was providence. Cobain's daughter,
Frances Bean Cobain Frances Bean Cobain (born August 18, 1992) is an American visual artist and model. She is the only child of Nirvana frontman Kurt Cobain and Hole frontwoman Courtney Love. She controls the publicity rights to her father's name and image. ...
, stated in 2018 that she will never read her father's journals and that she regretted her mother's decision to publish them in 2002.


References

{{Nirvana (band) 2002 non-fiction books Music autobiographies Kurt Cobain Journals Riverhead Books books Books published posthumously