How to Lose Your Virginity
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''How to Lose Your Virginity'' is an American
documentary film A documentary film or documentary is a non-fictional motion-picture intended to "document reality, primarily for the purposes of instruction, education or maintaining a historical record". Bill Nichols has characterized the documentary in te ...
directed by
Therese Shechter Therese Shechter is a filmmaker, writer and artist best known for the documentary films '' My So-Called Selfish Life'', (2022), ''How to Lose Your Virginity'' (Women Make Movies, 2013), '' I Was A Teenage Feminist'' (Women Make Movies 2005), ''Ho ...
and distributed by
Women Make Movies Women Make Movies is a non-profit feminist media arts organization based in New York City. Founded by Ariel Dougherty and Sheila Paige with Dolores Bargowski, WMM was first a feminist production collective that emerged from city-wide Women's Li ...
. The film examines how the concept of
virginity Virginity is the state of a person who has never engaged in sexual intercourse. The term ''virgin'' originally only referred to sexually inexperienced women, but has evolved to encompass a range of definitions, as found in traditional, modern ...
shapes the sexual lives of young women and men through the intersecting forces of history, politics, religion and popular culture. It premiered at DOC NYC, a New York City documentary festival, on November 17, 2013.


Synopsis

''How to Lose Your Virginity'' explores the concept of virginity from historical origins of the word,
virgin Virginity is the state of a person who has never engaged in sexual intercourse. The term ''virgin'' originally only referred to sexually inexperienced women, but has evolved to encompass a range of definitions, as found in traditional, modern ...
, to the modern day definitions perpetuated in popular culture. The film takes a critical look at how virginity is ‘restored’ through hymenoplasty, fetishized by
pornography Pornography (often shortened to porn or porno) is the portrayal of sexual subject matter for the exclusive purpose of sexual arousal. Primarily intended for adults,
, and celebrated at
purity balls A purity ball is a formal dance event typically practiced by some conservative Christian groups in the United States. The events are attended by fathers and their teenage daughters in order to promote virginity until marriage. Typically, daug ...
. Linking virginity culture to commerce, the film follows
Natalie Dylan The Moonlite BunnyRanch is a legal, licensed brothel in Mound House, Nevada, United States, east of Carson City. First opened in 1955, it came to national attention under Dennis Hof, who owned the brothel from 1992 until his death in 2018. Hi ...
's virginity auction and the sales of
artificial hymen An artificial hymen is a type of prosthetic created for the purpose of simulating an intact human hymen, usually to fake virginity.
on the internet. Shechter also visits the set of ''Barely Legal'' and discusses the success of the "virginity porn" genre. ''How to Lose Your Virginity'' questions the effectiveness of the abstinence-only sex education movement and observes how
sexuality Human sexuality is the way people experience and express themselves sexually. This involves biological, psychological, physical, erotic, emotional, social, or spiritual feelings and behaviors. Because it is a broad term, which has varied wit ...
continues to define a young woman's morality and self-worth. The meaning and necessity of virginity as a
social construct Social constructionism is a theory in sociology, social ontology, and communication theory which proposes that certain ideas about physical reality arise from collaborative consensus, instead of pure observation of said reality. The theory ...
is also examined through narration and interviews with notable sexuality experts, such as: former Surgeon General Dr. Joycelyn Elders, "Scarleteen" creator and editor
Heather Corinna Heather Corinna (born April 18, 1970) is an author, activist, and Internet publisher with a focus on progressive, affirming sexuality. Corinna is a self-described "queer, rabblerousing, polymath." Corinna is non-binary and has advocated for acce ...
, historian
Hanne Blank Hanne Blank, also known as Hanne Blank Boyd, is an American historian, writer, and editor. Her written works include ''Virgin: The Untouched History'', ''Straight: The Surprisingly Short History of Heterosexuality'', and ''The Unapologetic Fat G ...
, author
Jessica Valenti Jessica Valenti (; born November 1, 1978) is an American feminist writer. She was the co-founder of the blog Feministing, which she wrote for from 2004 to 2011. Valenti is the author of five books: ''Full Frontal Feminism'' (2007), ''He's a Stud, ...
, and
comprehensive sex education Comprehensive sexuality education (CSE) is a sex education instruction method based on-curriculum that aims to give students the knowledge, attitudes, skills, and values to make appropriate and healthy choices in their sexual lives. The intention i ...
advocate
Shelby Knox ''The Education of Shelby Knox'' is 2005 documentary film that tells the coming-of-age story of public speaker and feminist Shelby Knox, a teenager who joins a campaign for comprehensive sex education in the high schools of Lubbock, Texas.
.


Production

The film was directed by
Therese Shechter Therese Shechter is a filmmaker, writer and artist best known for the documentary films '' My So-Called Selfish Life'', (2022), ''How to Lose Your Virginity'' (Women Make Movies, 2013), '' I Was A Teenage Feminist'' (Women Make Movies 2005), ''Ho ...
, whose production company Trixie Films is based in Brooklyn. Working with Producer Lisa Esselstein, ''How to Lose Your Virginity'' was shot over several years in the U.S. and Canada. Other films produced by Trixie Films include the documentary feature '' I Was A Teenage Feminist'' and the documentary shorts "How I Learned to Speak Turkish" and "#slutwalknyc". Shechter was inspired to make the film because of the growing abstinence until marriage movement and her own experiences as an older virgin. While making the film, Shechter became engaged and incorporated trying on white wedding dresses into the film as a way of looking at how the wedding industry sells virginity. Over the course of the film's production, its
transmedia Transmedia storytelling (also known as transmedia narrative or multiplatform storytelling) is the technique of telling a single story or story experience across multiple platforms and formats using current digital technologies. From a producti ...
companion, ''The V-Card Diaries'' has crowd-sourced over 200 stories about what the site calls "sexual debuts and deferrals." It was exhibited at
The Kinsey Institute The Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender, and Reproduction (often shortened to The Kinsey Institute) is a research institute at Indiana University. Established in Bloomington, Indiana, in 1947 as a nonprofit, the institute merged with Indi ...
's 8th Annual Juried Art Show, the exhibit's first interactive piece.


Critical reception

Soraya Chemaly wrote in the ''
Huffington Post ''HuffPost'' (formerly ''The Huffington Post'' until 2017 and sometimes abbreviated ''HuffPo'') is an American progressive news website, with localized and international editions. The site offers news, satire, blogs, and original content, and ...
'', "Virginity is a powerful and malleable concept, as evidenced by the teenagers in Therese Shechter's smart, funny and provoking documentary." Leigh Kolb of Bitch Flicks said that "There's no anger, there's no judgment…Shechter’s ability to teach, dismantle, expose and explore is remarkable. The audience is left with newfound knowledge with which they can criticize myths of virginity in our culture. However, the audience is also left with respect for everyone’s stories. When a documentary can do that, it succeeds in a big way." In the ''
Jakarta Globe The ''Jakarta Globe'' is a daily online English-language newspaper in Indonesia, launched in November 2008. The paper initially came out as a print newspaper with an average of 48 pages a day, and published Monday to Saturday. It had three se ...
'', Paul Freelend wrote that "her work to highlight what she calls the 'virginity culture' and the misconceptions surrounding it may resonate as loudly in Indonesia and other developing countries as in the United States." Basil Tsoikos, programmer for the
Sundance Film Festival The Sundance Film Festival (formerly Utah/US Film Festival, then US Film and Video Festival) is an annual film festival organized by the Sundance Institute. It is the largest independent film festival in the United States, with more than 46,6 ...
and DOC NYC, in What (not) to doc remarked that "Shechter seems like the perfect filmmaker to tackle the complexities around virginity. It’s a topic that far too many people are obsessed about – probably for all the wrong reasons – so the film is sure to stimulate interest and provoke heated debate." J. Maureen Henderson of
Forbes.com ''Forbes'' () is an American business magazine owned by Integrated Whale Media Investments and the Forbes family. Published eight times a year, it features articles on finance, industry, investing, and marketing topics. ''Forbes'' also re ...
said that Shechter's work "tackles one of the last taboos in our culture’s discussion of sex – the deliberate decision not to participate in it.” Lena Corner of ''
The Guardian ''The Guardian'' is a British daily newspaper. It was founded in 1821 as ''The Manchester Guardian'', and changed its name in 1959. Along with its sister papers '' The Observer'' and '' The Guardian Weekly'', ''The Guardian'' is part of the ...
'' wrote that "It’s refreshing to hear such forthright voices in a world where any debate about virginity is often so conflicting or one-sided." Jennifer Wadsworth of
SFGate.com The ''San Francisco Chronicle'' is a newspaper serving primarily the San Francisco Bay Area of Northern California. It was founded in 1865 as ''The Daily Dramatic Chronicle'' by teenage brothers Charles de Young and Michael H. de Young. The pa ...
remarked that the project is "More than just a narrative about virginity. It’s about the connection of storytelling and how hearing about other people’s experience can make anyone else feel less alone in theirs."


References


External links

* {{IMDb title, tt2101566
Trailer: ''How to Lose Your Virginity''''Official HTLYV Website''

''The V-Card Diaries''''Women Make Movies Film Page''
2013 films American documentary films 2013 documentary films Documentary films about sexuality Social constructionism 2010s English-language films 2010s American films Virginity