''Erusin'' () is the

Hebrew Hebrew (; ; ) is a Northwest Semitic language of the Afroasiatic language family. Historically, it is one of the spoken languages of the Israelites and their longest-surviving descendants, the Jews and Samaritans. It was largely preserved ...

term for

betrothal An engagement or betrothal is the period of time between the declaration of acceptance of a marriage proposal and the marriage itself (which is typically but not always commenced with a wedding). During this period, a couple is said to be ''fi ...

. In

modern Hebrew Modern Hebrew ( he, עברית חדשה, ''ʿivrít ḥadašá ', , '' lit.'' "Modern Hebrew" or "New Hebrew"), also known as Israeli Hebrew or Israeli, and generally referred to by speakers simply as Hebrew ( ), is the standard form of the He ...

, "erusin" means

engagement An engagement or betrothal is the period of time between the declaration of acceptance of a marriage proposal and the marriage itself (which is typically but not always commenced with a wedding). During this period, a couple is said to be ''fi ...

, but this is not the historical meaning of the term, which is the first part of marriage (the second part being '' nissuin''). Since the

Middle Ages In the history of Europe, the Middle Ages or medieval period lasted approximately from the late 5th to the late 15th centuries, similar to the post-classical period of global history. It began with the fall of the Western Roman Empire ...

it is customary for the marriage to occur immediately after the betrothal, and to perform the betrothal during the marriage ceremony itself. Previously this was not the case, and there were often several months between the two events. In

and classical rabbinic literature, betrothal is frequently referred to as sanctification (Hebrew: ''Kiddushin'', קידושין), on account of the bride becoming "sanctified" (dedicated) to the groom.

In the Hebrew Bible

The idea of erusin making the couple accountable to the law against

adultery Adultery (from Latin ''adulterium'') is extramarital sex that is considered objectionable on social, religious, moral, or legal grounds. Although the sexual activities that constitute adultery vary, as well as the social, religious, and legal ...

, which is

punishable by death Capital punishment, also known as the death penalty, is the state-sanctioned practice of deliberately killing a person as a punishment for an actual or supposed crime, usually following an authorized, rule-governed process to conclude that t ...

, whilst at the same time, not making them "completely" married appears in

Deuteronomy Deuteronomy ( grc, Δευτερονόμιον, Deuteronómion, second law) is the fifth and last book of the Torah (in Judaism), where it is called (Hebrew: hbo, , Dəḇārīm, hewords Moses.html"_;"title="f_Moses">f_Moseslabel=none)_and_th ...

. A non-traditional view is that the betrothal was effected simply by purchasing the girl from her father (or guardian) (i.e. paying a

bride price Bride price, bride-dowry ( Mahr in Islam), bride-wealth, or bride token, is money, property, or other form of wealth paid by a groom or his family to the woman or the family of the woman he will be married to or is just about to marry. Bride dow ...

to the bride and her father). The price paid for her (bride price) is known by the Hebrew term ''mohar'' ()., , , , It was customary in

biblical times The history of ancient Israel and Judah begins in the Southern Levant during the Late Bronze Age and Early Iron Age. "Israel" as a people or tribal confederation (see Israelites) appears for the first time in the Merneptah Stele, an inscripti ...

for the bride and her father to be given parts of the ''mohar''. Gradually it lost its original meaning, and the custom arose of giving the ''mohar'' entirely to the bride, rather than to her father. The traditional commentators do not necessarily explain ''mohar'' this way.

Rashi Shlomo Yitzchaki ( he, רבי שלמה יצחקי; la, Salomon Isaacides; french: Salomon de Troyes, 22 February 1040 – 13 July 1105), today generally known by the acronym Rashi (see below), was a medieval French rabbi and author of a compre ...

understands ''mohar'' as a form of ''

ketubah A ketubah (; he, כְּתוּבָּה) is a Jewish marriage contract. It is considered an integral part of a traditional Jewish marriage, and outlines the rights and responsibilities of the groom, in relation to the bride. In modern practice, ...

'', an agreement to pay a certain amount upon divorce, and

Nachmanides Moses ben Nachman ( he, מֹשֶׁה בֶּן־נָחְמָן ''Mōše ben-Nāḥmān'', "Moses son of Nachman"; 1194–1270), commonly known as Nachmanides (; el, Ναχμανίδης ''Nakhmanídēs''), and also referred to by the acronym Ra ...

understands it as ''sovlanut'', a sort of dowry or engagement present. Rashi understands Rachel and Leah's complaint to Jacob ("we are considered strangers to him for he has sold us") as saying that it was not normal for a father to sell his daughters, at least not without also giving them a

dowry A dowry is a payment, such as property or money, paid by the bride's family to the groom or his family at the time of marriage. Dowry contrasts with the related concepts of bride price and dower. While bride price or bride service is a payment ...

. The girl's consent is not explicitly required by any statement in the Bible, neither is there explicit permission to ignore it; but in one Biblical story,

Rebecca Rebecca, ; Syriac: , ) from the Hebrew (lit., 'connection'), from Semitic root , 'to tie, couple or join', 'to secure', or 'to snare') () appears in the Hebrew Bible as the wife of Isaac and the mother of Jacob and Esau. According to biblical ...

was asked whether she agreed to be married before the marriage took place.

In the Talmud

The legal act

The Talmud states that there are three methods of performing erusin; by handing the woman a coin or object of nominal value, by handing her a document and through

consummation In many traditions and statutes of civil or religious law, the consummation of a marriage, often called simply ''consummation'', is the first (or first officially credited) act of sexual intercourse between two people, following their marriage t ...

(sexual intercourse), although the last is prohibited by the

Talmud The Talmud (; he, , Talmūḏ) is the central text of Rabbinic Judaism and the primary source of Jewish religious law ('' halakha'') and Jewish theology. Until the advent of modernity, in nearly all Jewish communities, the Talmud was the ce ...

because it is considered to be indecent for witnesses to watch a couple having intercourse (erusin ceremonies are to be confirmed by two witnesses). In all cases the woman's consent is required; however, it can be implied by her silence.

The ceremony

The blessings

The erusin is preceded by a blessing over wine and then the ''bircat erusin'' (betrothal blessing).The Jewish Way in Love & Marriage, Rabbi Maurice Lamm, Harper & Row, 1980, Chapter 15 If forgotten before the ceremony, it can be recited before the

is read.Made in Heaven, A Jewish Wedding Guide by Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan, Moznaim Publishing Company, New York / Jerusalem, 1983, Chapters 20 and 21 Originally the blessings were recited by the groom but today it is more common for someone else to recite them such as the wedding's Rabbi.

The betrothal

Today, the custom is to perform the betrothal by giving the bride an object whose value is well known, and fairly constant: a gold ring without a stone. This is in accordance with the first method mentioned above. The actual betrothal now takes place. The groom takes the ring and says in Hebrew, ''Behold, you are consecrated to me with this ring according to the laws of Moses and Israel''. The groom now places the ring on the bride’s index finger.

The ketubah

In order to separate the erusin and nissuin - the two parts of the wedding - the

is read.

Other issues

For legal purposes, a betrothed couple is regarded as husband and wife. Similarly, the union can only be ended by the same divorce process as for married couples. However, betrothal does not oblige the couple to behave towards each other in the manner that a married couple is required to, nor does it permit the couple to have a sexual relationship with each other. The rabbis prohibited marrying without an

('' shiddukhin''). Therefore, an old custom is to sign a '' Shetar haT'na'im'' as a formal form of engagement, forming an informal declaration of the couple's intentions,Adler, Binyamin. ''Sefer haNisuim Kehilchatam'', haMesorah Publishing, Jerusalem, 1985. chapter 3, paragraph 184-5. and is read close to the start of the betrothal ceremony.

References

External links

{{Marital life in Judaism Engagement Jewish marital law Weddings by religion Jewish life cycle Hebrew words and phrases in Jewish law