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''The Fast Show'', known as ''Brilliant'' in the US, is a BBC comedy
sketch show Sketch comedy comprises a series of short, amusing scenes or vignettes, called "sketches", commonly between one and ten minutes long, performed by a group of comic actors or comedians. The form developed and became popular in vaudeville, and ...
that ran from 1994 to 1997, with specials in 2000 and 2014. The show's central performers were
Paul Whitehouse Paul Julian Whitehouse (born 17 May 1958) is a Welsh actor, writer and comedian. He was one of the main stars of the BBC sketch comedy series '' The Fast Show'', and has also starred with Harry Enfield in the shows ''Harry & Paul'' and ''Harr ...
,
Charlie Higson Charles Murray Higson (born 3 July 1958) is an English actor, comedian, author and former singer. He has also written and produced for television and is the author of the ''Enemy'' book series, as well as the first five novels in the ''Young Bo ...
,
Simon Day Simon William Day (born 7 June 1962) is an English comedian and actor known for his roles in the sketch show '' The Fast Show'' and the sitcom ''Grass''. Career Day was born in Blackheath, London, and rose to fame as a stand-up comic, winning ...
, Mark Williams, John Thomson,
Arabella Weir Arabella Weir (born 6 December 1957) is a Scottish comedian, actress and writer. She played roles in the comedy series '' The Fast Show'' and '' Posh Nosh'', and has written several books, including ''Does My Bum Look Big in This?'' Weir has al ...
and
Caroline Aherne Caroline Mary Aherne (24 December 1963 – 2 July 2016) was an English actress, comedian and writer. She was best known for performing as the acerbic chat show host '' Mrs Merton'', in various roles in '' The Fast Show'', and as Denise in '' The ...
. Other significant cast members included
Felix Dexter Felix Dexter (26 July 1961
Retrieved 22 October 2013
, Paul Shearer, Rhys Thomas, Jeff Harding,
Maria McErlane Maria McErlane (born 9 December 1957, in Buckinghamshire, England) is a British actress and presenter specialising in comedy. She has been acting since 1984. She has appeared in several TV series, including '' The Fast Show'', '' Gimme Gimme Gi ...
, Eryl Maynard,
Colin McFarlane Colin Andrew Ignatius Peter McFarlane (born 15 September 1961) is a British actor, narrator and voice actor. He is best known for his role as Gillian B. Loeb in two films of Christopher Nolan's '' The Dark Knight Trilogy'', Ulysses in the STAR ...
and Donna Ewin. Loosely structured and reliant on character sketches,
running gag A running gag, or running joke, is a literary device that takes the form of an amusing joke or a comical reference and appears repeatedly throughout a work of literature or other form of storytelling. Though they are similar, catchphrases are no ...
s and many
catchphrase A catchphrase (alternatively spelled catch phrase) is a phrase or expression recognized by its repeated utterance. Such phrases often originate in popular culture and in the arts, and typically spread through word of mouth and a variety of mass ...
s, its fast-paced " blackout" style set it apart from traditional sketch series because of the number and relative brevity of its sketches; a typical half-hour TV sketch comedy of the period might have consisted of nine or ten major items, with contrived situations and extended setups, whereas the premiere episode featured 27 sketches in 30 minutes,Dewhurst, Keith (2007), "The Fast Show – A Personal View" (notes for ''The Ultimate Fast Show Collection'' DVD set, BBC) with some items lasting less than ten seconds and none running longer than three minutes. Its style and presentation influenced many later series such as ''
Little Britain Little Britain may refer to: Arts and entertainment * ''Little Britain'' (sketch show), a British radio and then TV show ** ''Little Britain USA'', an American spin-off * "Little Britain", a song by Dreadzone from the 1995 album ''Second Light'' * ...
'' and ''
The Catherine Tate Show ''The Catherine Tate Show'' is a British television sketch comedy written by Catherine Tate and Derren Litten. Tate also stars in all but one of the show's sketches, which feature a wide range of characters. ''The Catherine Tate Show'' airs on ...
''. The show was released on VHS, DVD and audio CD. Some of its characters, such as
Ted and Ralph Ted and Ralph are fictional characters created by Arthur Mathews and Graham Linehan, played by Paul Whitehouse and Charlie Higson in the BBC comedy sketch show '' The Fast Show''. They featured in all three series of the show, and are arguably ...
and Swiss Toni, have had their own
spin-off Spin-off may refer to: *Spin-off (media), a media work derived from an existing work *Corporate spin-off, a type of corporate action that forms a new company or entity * Government spin-off, civilian goods which are the result of military or gov ...
programmes. It also produced two national tours, the first in 1998, with the cast of the BBC surrealist comedy quiz show '' Shooting Stars'', and the second, their Farewell Tour, in 2002. Higson announced on 5 September 2011 that ''The Fast Show'' would return for a new, online-only series. The series was later shown as two 30-minute parts rather than the original eleven short episodes as part of a 50th birthday celebration for
BBC2 BBC Two is a British free-to-air public broadcast television network owned and operated by the BBC. It covers a wide range of subject matter, with a remit "to broadcast programmes of depth and substance" in contrast to the more mainstream a ...
, the channel on which originally aired.


Style and content

''The Fast Show'' was the brainchild of Paul Whitehouse and friend and writing partner Charlie Higson; Higson had previously enjoyed some success in the UK as a musician in the band The Higsons. After meeting through a mutual friend, comedian
Harry Enfield Henry Richard Enfield (born 30 May 1961) is an English comedian, actor, writer and director. He is known in particular for his television work, including '' Harry Enfield's Television Programme'' and ''Harry & Paul'', and for the creation and ...
invited Whitehouse to write for him. Whitehouse in turn asked Higson to help him out. In the early 1990s, Higson and Whitehouse worked extensively with Vic Reeves and
Bob Mortimer Robert Renwick Mortimer (born 23 May 1959) is an English comedian, podcast presenter and actor. He is known for his work with Vic Reeves as part of their Vic and Bob comedy double act, and more recently the '' Mortimer & Whitehouse: Gone Fishing ...
, writing for and performing in the series ''
The Smell of Reeves and Mortimer ''The Smell of Reeves and Mortimer'' is a BBC TV sketch show written by and starring double act Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer. Its first series appeared in 1993 following the duo's move to the BBC after parting company with Channel 4. The show d ...
'' and ''
Bang Bang, It's Reeves and Mortimer ''Bang Bang, It's Reeves and Mortimer'' is a British comedy television series, the third by comedy double act Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer and their second in a sketch show format. Directed by Mark Mylod and produced by Alan Marke, it first aired ...
'' (both of which Higson produced). These series also featured numerous appearances by future ''Fast Show'' cast members Caroline Aherne, Simon Day, Mark Williams and Rhys Thomas. Higson made many appearances in minor roles, while Williams and Whitehouse had recurring roles (with Vic and Bob) in ''The Smell of Reeves and Mortimer'', parodying the members of rock group
Slade Slade are an English rock band formed in Wolverhampton in 1966. They rose to prominence during the glam rock era in the early 1970s, achieving 17 consecutive top 20 hits and six number ones on the UK Singles Chart. The ''British Hit Singles ...
in the "Slade in Residence" and "Slade on Holiday" sketches. Inspired by a press preview tape of Enfield's show, compiled by producer friend
Geoffrey Perkins Geoffrey Howard Perkins (22 February 1953 – 29 August 2008) was a British comedy producer, writer and performer. Best known as the BBC head of comedy (1995–2001), he produced the first two radio series of ''The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galax ...
and consisting of fast-cut highlights of Enfield's sketches, the pair began stockpiling material and developing the idea of a rapid-fire 'MTV generation'-format based on quick cuts and soundbites/catchphrases. After unsuccessfully trying to sell the series to ITV through an independent production company, Higson and Whitehouse approached the new controller of
BBC2 BBC Two is a British free-to-air public broadcast television network owned and operated by the BBC. It covers a wide range of subject matter, with a remit "to broadcast programmes of depth and substance" in contrast to the more mainstream a ...
,
Michael Jackson Michael Joseph Jackson (August 29, 1958 – June 25, 2009) was an American singer, songwriter, dancer, and philanthropist. Dubbed the " King of Pop", he is regarded as one of the most significant cultural figures of the 20th century. Over ...
. He was looking for new shows at the time to replace several high-profile series that had been recently lost to
BBC1 BBC One is a British free-to-air public broadcast television network owned and operated by the BBC. It is the corporation's flagship network and is known for broadcasting mainstream programming, which includes BBC News television bulletins, ...
, and their show was picked up. Whitehouse and Higson, as co-producers and main writers, assembled the original team of writers and performers, which included David Cummings, Mark Williams, Caroline Aherne, Paul Shearer, Simon Day, Arabella Weir, John Thomson,
Graham Linehan Graham Linehan () (born 22 May 1968) is an Irish television writer and anti- transgender activist. He created or co-created the sitcoms '' Father Ted'' (1995–1998), ''Black Books'' (2000–2004) and '' The IT Crowd'' (2006–2013). He has al ...
and Arthur Mathews (of ''
Father Ted ''Father Ted'' is a sitcom created by Irish writers Graham Linehan and Arthur Mathews and produced by British production company Hat Trick Productions for Channel 4. It aired over three series from 21 April 1995 until 1 May 1998, includin ...
'' fame),
Dave Gorman David James Gorman (born 2 March 1971) is an English comedian, presenter, and writer. Gorman began his career writing for comedy series such as ''The Mrs Merton Show'' (1993–1998) and '' The Fast Show'' (1994–1997), and later garnered a ...
, Vic Reeves, Bob Mortimer and Craig Cash (who went on to write and perform with Aherne in ''
The Royle Family ''The Royle Family'' is a British sitcom produced by Granada Television for the BBC, which ran for three series from 1998 to 2000, and specials from 2006 to 2012. It centres on the lives of a television-fixated Manchester family, the Royles, com ...
''). Musical director Philip Pope was also an established comedy actor with extensive experience in TV and radio comedy, and had previously appeared in series such as ''
Who Dares Wins ''Who Dares Wins'' (Latin: ''Qui audet adipiscitur''; el, Ο Τολμών Νικά, ''O tolmón niká''; french: Qui ose gagne; it, Chi osa vince; Portuguese: ''Quem ousa vence''; German: ''Wer wagt, gewinnt'') is a motto made popular in the ...
'' and '' KYTV''; he also enjoyed success as a comedy recording artist as part of The HeeBeeGeebees, the
Bee Gees The Bee Gees were a musical group formed in 1958 by brothers Barry Gibb, Barry, Robin Gibb, Robin, and Maurice Gibb. The trio were especially successful in popular music in the late 1960s and early 1970s, and later as prominent performers in ...
parody group. ''The Fast Show'' was a
working title A working title, which may be abbreviated and styled in trade publications after a putative title as (wt), also called a production title or a tentative title, is the temporary title of a product or project used during its development, usually ...
disliked by both Whitehouse and Higson but it went unchanged through production and eventually remained as the final title.Comedy Connections: The Fast Show (Season 4 Episode 1, 2006, BBC TV) The first series introduced many signature characters and sketches including
Ted and Ralph Ted and Ralph are fictional characters created by Arthur Mathews and Graham Linehan, played by Paul Whitehouse and Charlie Higson in the BBC comedy sketch show '' The Fast Show''. They featured in all three series of the show, and are arguably ...
, Unlucky Alf, the Fat Sweaty Coppers, Ron Manager, Roy and Renée, Ken and Kenneth (The Suit You Tailors), Jesse (of "Jesse's diets"), Arthur Atkinson, Bob Fleming, Brilliant Kid, Insecure Woman, Janine Carr, Denzil Dexter, Carl Hooper, Ed Winchester, the Patagonians, "Jazz Club" and the parody "Chanel 9." Many characters were never named, with their sketches being written to give their catchphrase as the punchline of each sketch. Examples include "Anyone fancy a pint?" (played by Whitehouse), "You ain't seen me, right!" (a mysterious gangster-like character played by Mark Williams), "I'll get me coat" (Williams) and "Ha!," a sarcastic elderly woman played by Weir. Other long-standing running jokes in the programme included the fictitious snack food "Cheesy Peas" in various forms, shapes and flavours, in satirical adverts presented by a northern boy who claims, "They're great for your teas!" and has since become a reality thanks to UK TV chef
Jamie Oliver James Trevor Oliver MBE OSI (born 27 May 1975) is an English chef, restaurateur and cookbook author. He is known for his casual approach to cuisine, which has led him to front numerous television shows and open many restaurants. Oliver reach ...
. The earnestness of the
born-again Christian Born again, or to experience the new birth, is a phrase, particularly in evangelicalism, that refers to a "spiritual rebirth", or a regeneration of the human spirit. In contrast to one's physical birth, being "born again" is distinctly and sep ...
was parodied in another group of sketches where various characters responded to any comment or question by extolling the virtues of "Our Lord Jesus" and ended the sketch with the exclamation "He died for all our sins, didn't he?" or something similar; and "We're from the
Isle of Man ) , anthem = " O Land of Our Birth" , image = Isle of Man by Sentinel-2.jpg , image_map = Europe-Isle_of_Man.svg , mapsize = , map_alt = Location of the Isle of Man in Europe , map_caption = Location of the Isle of Man (green) in Europ ...
," featuring a stereotype of odd townsfolk in a setting portrayed as an impoverished and desolate cultural wasteland. Some of the characters resembled parodies of well-known personalities: for example, Louis Balfour, host of "Jazz Club" was reminiscent of Bob Harris of ''
The Old Grey Whistle Test ''The Old Grey Whistle Test'' (sometimes abbreviated to ''Whistle Test'' or ''OGWT'') is a British television music show. The show was devised by BBC producer Rowan Ayers, commissioned by David Attenborough and aired on BBC2 from 1971 to 1988. ...
'' and Ron Manager of football pundits
Jimmy Hill James William Thomas Hill, OBE (22 July 1928 – 19 December 2015) was an English footballer and later a television personality. His career included almost every role in the sport, including player, trade union leader, coach, manager, director, ...
,
Trevor Brooking Sir Trevor David Brooking, (born 2 October 1948) is a former England international footballer, manager, pundit and football administrator; he now works as director of football development in England. He spent almost his entire career at West ...
and
Graham Taylor Graham Taylor (15 September 1944 – 12 January 2017) was an English football player, manager, pundit and chairman of Watford Football Club. He was the manager of the England national football team from 1990 to 1993, and also managed Lincoln C ...
. Paul Whitehouse said that Ron Manager was based on ex-QPR, Luton Town and Fulham manager
Alec Stock Alec William Alfred Stock (30 March 1917 – 16 April 2001) was an English footballer and manager. He briefly managed AS Roma, between long spells at Leyton Orient and Queens Park Rangers. At QPR, he won successive promotions, leading the club t ...
. Arthur Atkinson is a composite of
Arthur Askey Arthur Bowden Askey, (6 June 1900 – 16 November 1982) was an English comedian and actor. Askey was known for his short stature (5' 2", 1.58 m) and distinctive horn-rimmed glasses, and his playful humour incorporating improvisation ...
and Max Miller. The show ended in 2000, with a three-part "Last Ever" show, in the first episode of which ''Fast Show'' fan
Johnny Depp John Christopher Depp II (born June 9, 1963) is an American actor and musician. He is the recipient of List of awards and nominations received by Johnny Depp, multiple accolades, including a Golden Globe Award and a Screen Actors Guild Awa ...
had a guest-starring role as a customer of The Suit You Tailors, after three series and a Christmas special. The theme tune was " Release Me", a song which had been a hit for pop singer Engelbert Humperdinck. In the first series it was performed over the opening credits by Whitehouse in the guise of abnormally transfiguring singer Kenny Valentine. In subsequent series, the tune only appeared in the closing credits, played on the saxophone.


List of regular characters and sketches

The show featured many characters and sketches. Some of the more prominent recurring characters/sketches are: * "Unlucky" Alf (Whitehouse), a lonely old pensioner living somewhere in Northern England for whom nothing ever goes right. He often predicts an unfortunate, but obvious, event, only to encounter a worse event as he tries to avoid the first problem. His catchphrase is his resigned "Oh bugger!" as something terrible happens. (all series) * "Anyone fancy a pint?" (Whitehouse), a man who finds himself in boring or bizarre situations, such as a dinner party where a woman is talking about how she was abandoned as a child and crying about everyone letting her down. Whitehouse then interrupts at the most insensitive moment asking "Anyone fancy a pint?", before he and most of the men in the room leave. One early sketch featured Higson portraying an earnest
claymation Clay animation or claymation, sometimes plasticine animation, is one of many forms of stop-motion animation. Each animated piece, either character or background, is "deformable"—made of a malleable substance, usually plasticine clay. Tra ...
animator (a parody of
Nick Park Nicholas Wulstan Park (born 6 December 1958) is a British animator who created ''Wallace and Gromit'', ''Creature Comforts'', ''Chicken Run'', ''Shaun the Sheep'', and '' Early Man''. Park has been nominated for an Academy Award a total of ...
) who describes the animation process in excruciatingly tedious detail by moving each feature "just a tiny amount" until Whitehouse's character sneaks away, whispering the punch line. According to an audio commentary as part of the extras in ''The Ultimate Fast Show Collection'', Park loved the sketch and sent copies of it to friends and family that year as a video Christmas card. * Archie the pub bore (Whitehouse). Talks to people in the pub, and when they mention their profession, no matter what it is and however unlikely, he always claims to have had the same profession ("I used to be a single mother myself"), saying that it is the "hardest game in the world. Thirty years, man and boy!" He has an obsession with
Frank Sinatra Francis Albert Sinatra (; December 12, 1915 – May 14, 1998) was an American singer and actor. Nicknamed the " Chairman of the Board" and later called "Ol' Blue Eyes", Sinatra was one of the most popular entertainers of the 1940s, 1950s, and ...
, almost invariably steering the conversation towards the singer and weakly singing the title line of " High Hopes", after mentioning how he and his friend Stan fared on a recent fishing trip. (Whitehouse, Series 3) * Arthur Atkinson (Whitehouse), parody of 1940s music hall entertainers such as Max Miller and
Arthur Askey Arthur Bowden Askey, (6 June 1900 – 16 November 1982) was an English comedian and actor. Askey was known for his short stature (5' 2", 1.58 m) and distinctive horn-rimmed glasses, and his playful humour incorporating improvisation ...
, introduced by Tommy Cockles (Day), himself a parody of presenters of TV history. Atkinson delivers mostly nonsensical jokes, and repeats his two signature phrases "How queer!" and "Where's me washboard?" This never fails to make the audience laugh (indicated by stock footage of real 1940s comedy show audiences). The only exception was a huge scandal caused by Atkinson saying the word "
shit ''Shit'' is a word considered to be vulgar and profane in Modern English. As a noun, it refers to fecal matter, and as a verb it means to defecate; in the plural ("the shits"), it means diarrhea. ''Shite'' is a common variant in British ...
" in public. Atkinson's long-suffering sidekick Chester Drawers (Thomson) also appears, usually to an empty theatre, only for it to fill again as soon as Atkinson returns to the stage. Off camera, Atkinson is portrayed as a lecherous bully and sketches in later series feature him struggling to fit into the changing styles of comedy in the 1960s and 1970s (all series) * Billy Bleach (Day), tousle-mopped, interfering pub know-it-all who gets it all wrong, usually ending up with others losing money. His catchphrases include "Hold the bells" and "Someone's sitting there, mate". This character starred in his own series, ''
Grass Poaceae () or Gramineae () is a large and nearly ubiquitous family of monocotyledonous flowering plants commonly known as grasses. It includes the cereal grasses, bamboos and the grasses of natural grassland and species cultivated in lawns a ...
'' which was shown on
BBC Three BBC Three is a British free-to-air public broadcast television channel owned and operated by the BBC. It was first launched on 9 February 2003 with programmes targeting 16 to 34-year-olds, covering all genres including animation, comedy, cur ...
, later on
BBC Two BBC Two is a British free-to-air public broadcast television network owned and operated by the BBC. It covers a wide range of subject matter, with a remit "to broadcast programmes of depth and substance" in contrast to the more mainstream a ...
. (all series) * Bob Fleming (Higson), the ageing, incompetent
Norfolk Norfolk () is a ceremonial and non-metropolitan county in East Anglia in England. It borders Lincolnshire to the north-west, Cambridgeshire to the west and south-west, and Suffolk to the south. Its northern and eastern boundaries are the Nor ...
host of ''Country Matters'', who has an extremely bad cough. His surname is a pun on ''phlegm-ing''. ''Country matters'' is a Shakespearean euphemism for
cunnilingus Cunnilingus is an oral sex act performed by a person on the vulva or vagina of another person. The clitoris is the most sexually sensitive part of the human female genitalia, and its stimulation may result in a woman becoming sexually aroused ...
, from ''
Hamlet ''The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark'', often shortened to ''Hamlet'' (), is a tragedy written by William Shakespeare sometime between 1599 and 1601. It is Shakespeare's longest play, with 29,551 words. Set in Denmark, the play depicts ...
''. In addition to Bob, two of his friends – Clive Tucker, who cannot stop shouting 'Arse!' (Whitehouse) and Jed Thomas, who cannot stop sneezing (Williams) – make regular appearances on his show. These two characters switched names from series 2 onwards. (all series) * Brilliant Kid (Whitehouse). In the first draft of the script for the pilot, this character was called Eric and was described as "a young
Yorkshire Yorkshire ( ; abbreviated Yorks), formally known as the County of York, is a Historic counties of England, historic county in northern England and by far the largest in the United Kingdom. Because of its large area in comparison with other Eng ...
man" but in the series he is never named. He delivers an edited monologue listing everyday things, all of which he declares to be "brilliant!" or "fantastic!" as he walks through a series of random backgrounds (filmed in various locations ranging from the
Tees Valley Tees Valley is a mayoral combined authority and Local enterprise partnership area in northern England, around the River Tees. The area is not a geographical valley. The LEP was established in 2011 and the combined authority was establish ...
to
Iceland Iceland ( is, Ísland; ) is a Nordic island country in the North Atlantic Ocean and in the Arctic Ocean. Iceland is the most sparsely populated country in Europe. Iceland's capital and largest city is Reykjavík, which (along with its ...
) during which the quality and format of the images also randomly changes (e.g., from colour to
black-and-white Black-and-white (B&W or B/W) images combine black and white in a continuous spectrum, producing a range of shades of grey. Media The history of various visual media began with black and white, and as technology improved, altered to color. ...
). In one episode he expresses doubt about whether everything really is 'brilliant' or not, and as he is walking through one background, an abandoned funfair, he debates with himself halfheartedly ("Everything ''is'' brilliant... right? I mean... it might not be... nah, it is!") (all series) * Carl Hooper (Day), Australian presenter of ''That's Amazing'', a spoof of pop-science shows, in particular the Australian show
The Curiosity Show ''The Curiosity Show'' is an Australian educational children's television show produced from 1972 to 1990 and hosted by Rob Morrison and Deane Hutton. The show was produced by Banksia Productions in South Australia for the Nine Network. 500 e ...
. Normally such a person would try to pass off an everyday animal or object as something magical. The one occasion where a guest had a truly amazing story to tell was not able to be broadcast due to the guest's inability to refrain from swearing excitedly while relating the tale (all series) * Chanel 9 (Whitehouse, Shearer, Day, Aherne) a low-budget television channel from a country known only as "Republicca", or full title "Republicca Democratia Militaria" ruled by "El Presidente" who resembles a stereotypical Latin American dictator. Spoken in a concocted language loosely based on Italian, Greek, Spanish and Portuguese, mashed together with nonsensical phrases (e.g., "sminky pinky") and incongruous English names and words (e.g. footballer
Chris Waddle Christopher Roland Waddle (born 14 December 1960) is an English former professional football player and manager. He currently works as a commentator. Nicknamed "Magic Chris", football journalist Luke Ginnell wrote that Waddle was "widely ackn ...
). Early segments featured the Chanel 9 Neus, read by anchormen Poutremos Poutra-Poutros - later Poutremos Poutra-Poutremos (Whitehouse) and Kolothos Apollonia (Shearer), followed by the weather forecast with meteorologist Poula Fisch (Aherne), invariably reporting a temperature for all locations of 45 °C (113 °F) while exclaiming "Scorchio!" with apparent surprise. * Chip Cobb (Thomson), the deaf stuntman, a TV and film stuntman who, because of his hearing problems, always mishears his instructions and proceeds to carry them out incorrectly before anyone can stop him, much to the despair of the film crew. In the
East Midlands The East Midlands is one of nine official regions of England at the first level of ITL for statistical purposes. It comprises the eastern half of the area traditionally known as the Midlands. It consists of Leicestershire, Derbyshire, L ...
of England, a "chip cob" is a sandwich of chips made with a bread roll (known locally as a "cob"). (Thomson, series 3) * Chris the Crafty Cockney (Whitehouse), claims to be an incurable
kleptomaniac Kleptomania is the inability to resist the urge to steal items, usually for reasons other than personal use or financial gain. First described in 1816, kleptomania is classified in psychiatry as an impulse control disorder. Some of the main ch ...
("I'll nick anything, me"). He is left alone with something valuable and invariably steals it. Because of how upfront he is about his thieving nature, most people tend to believe he is joking. In one sketch, he even alludes to being an actual clinical kleptomaniac and involuntarily steals from his friend Dan after Dan trusts him to watch his newspaper stall, after extensively warning him of the risks involved in doing so. (series 2–3) * Colin Hunt (Higson), unfunny and irritating office joker. Very socially inept, he compensates with humour by repeating catchphrases or making other extraneous cultural references ad nauseam (“The bells, Esmerelda, the bells!”), as well as multi-coloured clothing, and never being able to answer a question without adding one nonsensical remark after another. (series 2–3) * Competitive Dad (Day), overcritical and demanding of his kids, he always has to get one up on them. (series 2–3). Day explained in an interview that he had based the idea for the character on a man he noticed in a public swimming pool who challenged his two young children to a race. Day thought he would let them win, but instead he took off and stood on the other end of the pool waiting for his toddler sons to struggle their way across the pool. Day thought of it as "sick"."Suit You, Sir! The Inside Leg of the Fast Show" documentary (1999, BBC TV) * Professor Denzil Dexter (Thomson), bespectacled, long-haired, bearded and highly laid-back scientist at the
University of Southern California , mottoeng = "Let whoever earns the palm bear it" , religious_affiliation = Nonsectarian—historically Methodist , established = , accreditation = WSCUC , type = Private research university , academic_affiliations = , endowment = $8.1 ...
who conducts bizarre scientific experiments. (series 1–2, online series) * Different With Boys (Weir), a woman who is assertive and assured (sometimes to the point of over-confidence or bullying) when in the company of other women, but becomes coy, giggly and childishly winsome whenever a man enters the room. The character debuted in series 1 during a small segment in the credits, but only became a recurring character later on. (series 2) * The 13th Duke of Wybourne (Whitehouse), posh, rumpled dinner-jacketed, lecherous cigar smoker, reminisces about finding himself in wholly unsuitable places, generally involving women, considering his "reputation". His only line is his signature phrase, which is always in the same format, but details vary – such as "Me, the 13th Duke of Wybourne? Here, in a women's prison at 3 AM? With my reputation? What were they thinking?" (series 3) * The Fat Sweaty Coppers, a squad of police officers who cannot do their job properly as they are extremely overweight due to their constant eating and drinking. Some of these sketches were preceded by a parody of the opening of ITV
police procedural The police show, or police crime drama, is a subgenre of procedural drama and detective fiction that emphasizes the investigative procedure of a police officer or department as the protagonist(s), as contrasted with other genres that focus on eit ...
''
The Bill ''The Bill'' is a British police procedural television series, first broadcast on ITV from 16 August 1983 until 31 August 2010. The programme originated from a one-off drama, '' Woodentop'', broadcast in August 1983. The programme focused o ...
''. Two sets of legs would be shown walking down a street, dropping sweet wrappers, disposable cups and fast food containers as they go. Another sketch parodies the 1994 movie ''
Speed In everyday use and in kinematics, the speed (commonly referred to as ''v'') of an object is the magnitude of the change of its position over time or the magnitude of the change of its position per unit of time; it is thus a scalar quant ...
''. (Thomson and Weir included, series 1-2) * Girl Men Can't Hear (Weir), a woman who tries to put forward an idea to a group of men but is completely ignored, only for a man in that group to repeat what she has just said and receive congratulations from the others for having had such a good idea. This character was invented by Weir to parody similar experiences she had had with the men in the ''Fast Show'' team. * "I'll Get Me Coat" (Williams), a socially inept Brummie, who is unable to make any appropriate contribution to a conversation, and disgraces himself with a faux pas before using the punchline and leaving. However, in one sketch his accent disappears as the character tries to upstage his friends as to how middle-class he is. (all series) * "I'm not Pissed", a family – mother (Maria McErlane), father (Williams) and son (Day) – who regularly point out that they are not drunk despite the fact they are taking regular sly swigs from gin bottles, beer cans, and the like hidden throughout the house. (series 2) * Indecisive Dave (Whitehouse), a man who tries to have opinions about the topic du jour whilst talking with his mates (Day and Williams) in the pub, but refuses to disagree with any of them for fear of offending. As a result he fails to come to a conclusion about anything and lives his life in a state of perpetual bewilderment. (all series) * Insecure Woman (Weir), appears in a variety of different locations, usually exclaiming, "Does my bum look big in this?" (all series). Weir subsequently published a novel, ''Does My Bum Look Big in This?: the Diary of an Insecure Woman'' (1998). * Jesse (Williams), a taciturn country bumpkin who exclaims his strange diets, fashion tastes and experiments, in a single sentence "This week, I 'ave been mostly..." - except for one sketch, where he says "This week, I 'aven't been 'ungry." (Williams, series 2–3) * John Actor (Day), who plays Inspector Monkfish, the title character in a fictional BBC police drama. Monkfish is a "tough, uncompromising cop" who often exclaims to the nearest woman, "Put your knickers on and make me a cup of tea!" (series 2–3, online series). There were variations on the show's format, two examples being Monkfish as a "tough, uncompromising doctor" in ''Monkfish M.D.'' and Monkfish as a "tough, uncompromising vet" in '' All Monkfish Great and Small''. One Monkfish sketch even crossed over onto Chanel 9 with a promo for a series named after him with his catchphrase spoken in the channel's comedic language. Sometime between the end of series 3 and the last episode, John Actor dies yet the series is apparently continuing in the manner of ''
Taggart ''Taggart'' is a Scottish detective fiction television programme created by Glenn Chandler, who wrote many of the episodes, and made by STV Studios for the ITV network. It originally ran as the miniseries "Killer" from 6 until 20 Septembe ...
'' after the death of the lead actor. * Johnny Nice Painter (Higson), a man who paints a scene, describing all the colours. Whenever he or his wife Katie (Weir) mentions the colour "black", however, he becomes more and more depressed, eventually going somewhat insane and shouting wildly about the despair of mankind ("Where are we sleeping tonight, mother? Father's grave?", "You lock me in a cellar and feed me pins!"), despite the best efforts of his wife to prevent him from doing so. His appearance is allegedly based on bearded TV painter Alwyn Crawshaw. (series 3, online series) * Ken and Kenneth (Whitehouse and Williams), two tailors in a men's formal wear shop, who bombard potential customers with sexually explicit innuendo about their private life, frequently interjecting the catchphrase "Ooh! Suit you, sir!," much to the discomfort of the customer. They become confused and even frightened in two episodes; one when they get a customer who is gay, and another with a customer (Day) who is as willing to talk about sexual deviance as they are. Due to Williams's absence from the online series, his character Kenneth was written out and replaced by Kenton, played by Charlie Higson. (Ken and Kenneth: series 1,2,3; Ken and Kenton: online specials) * Louis Balfour (Thomson), pretentious and ultra laid-back presenter of ''Jazz Club'' (a parody of ''
The Old Grey Whistle Test ''The Old Grey Whistle Test'' (sometimes abbreviated to ''Whistle Test'' or ''OGWT'') is a British television music show. The show was devised by BBC producer Rowan Ayers, commissioned by David Attenborough and aired on BBC2 from 1971 to 1988. ...
''), based on a blend of Bob Harris and
Roger Moore Sir Roger George Moore (14 October 192723 May 2017) was an English actor. He was the third actor to portray fictional British secret agent James Bond in the Eon Productions film series, playing the character in seven feature films between 1 ...
. Seemingly having done his "research", he introduces his guests by comparing them to avant-garde jazz musicians or describing their style/technique by using complex musical phraseology. These guests usually turn out to be utterly talentless "experimentalists", generally to his bemusement. Although he also often appears to appreciate the music, he once followed his apparent appreciation with a look of disgust. His catchphrase "Nice!" was delivered by turning to a different camera for that word only. Later he delivered other words in a similar manner. His jazz characters often have ridiculous names of real places, such as 'Theydon Bois' on drums and 'Stamford Brook' on bass (both stations on the
London Underground The London Underground (also known simply as the Underground or by its nickname the Tube) is a rapid transit system serving Greater London and some parts of the adjacent counties of Buckinghamshire, Essex and Hertfordshire in England. The ...
map), and 'Stepney Green', son of Soylent. In addition, some guests were obvious parodies of real musicians such as
Jay Kay Jay Kay (born Jason Luís Cheetham; 30 December 1969) is an English singer and songwriter. He is best known as the co-founder and lead vocalist of the acid jazz and funk band Jamiroquai, which was formed in 1992. Early life Jay Kay was bo ...
,
Tony Bennett Anthony Dominick Benedetto (born August 3, 1926), known professionally as Tony Bennett, is an American retired singer of traditional pop standards, big band, show tunes, and jazz. Bennett is also a painter, having created works under his birt ...
and
Nigel Kennedy Nigel Kennedy (born 28 December 1956) is an English violinist and violist. His early career was primarily spent performing classical music, and he has since expanded into jazz, klezmer, and other music genres. Early life and background Kenn ...
. (series 2–3, online series) In one episode Jazz Club was parodied as "Indie Club", presented by Simon Rhodes (Day) as an obvious parody of the music journalism of the time. The musical guests, Colon, were described as dangerous and uncompromising, only for the music to be twee jangly indie-pop. * "No Offence" (Weir), also known as Pushy Saleswoman, a rude, orange-faced South African department store cosmetics saleswoman who has no qualms about informing women of their physical imperfections, seemingly oblivious to the fact that she herself is unattractive. (series 3) * "Our" Janine Carr (Aherne), a teenage mum with a unique world outlook. She refuses to reveal who the father of her baby is because "it's not fair to grass on your headmaster". (series 1–2, online series) * Simon and Lindsey (Higson and Whitehouse), two offroaders who, despite their unusually high confidence and self-esteem, are useless at their hobby ("It's gripped!," "It's sorted!"). (all series) * Patrick Nice (Williams), a man who tells far-fetched, sometimes odd stories, usually containing an element of extraordinary fortune or success, such as his son winning the
Nobel Prize The Nobel Prizes ( ; sv, Nobelpriset ; no, Nobelprisen ) are five separate prizes that, according to Alfred Nobel's will of 1895, are awarded to "those who, during the preceding year, have conferred the greatest benefit to humankind." Alfr ...
– followed by calmly saying his catchphrase, "Which was nice." (series 2–3) * Ron Manager (Whitehouse), a football commentator who speaks in incoherent sentence fragments on randomly divergent trains of thought. He usually appears with interviewer (Day) and fellow Scottish commentator Tommy (Williams), and whenever a question is posed to Tommy, Ron Manager often begins one of his "
stream of consciousness In literary criticism, stream of consciousness is a narrative mode or method that attempts "to depict the multitudinous thoughts and feelings which pass through the mind" of a narrator. The term was coined by Daniel Oliver in 1840 in ''First L ...
" monologues based on one of the words or names in the question, often finishing with youngsters playing with "jumpers for goalposts". Based on former football manager from the '60s and '70s,
Alec Stock Alec William Alfred Stock (30 March 1917 – 16 April 2001) was an English footballer and manager. He briefly managed AS Roma, between long spells at Leyton Orient and Queens Park Rangers. At QPR, he won successive promotions, leading the club t ...
. (all TV and online series) * Rowley Birkin QC (Whitehouse), a retired barrister, tells mostly unintelligible stories at the fireside. Occasionally, his speech becomes coherent for a short while, containing strange phrases such as "The whole thing was made completely out of matchsticks" or "Snake! Snake!" Almost always ends his stories with a sly "I'm afraid I was very, very drunk". In the final episode of series 2, his rambling anecdote appeared to involve a woman for whom he had great affection and ended with a close-up of faint tears on his cheeks, while the usual "very drunk" line was delivered in an unexpectedly moving, sorrowful voice. The character is reprised as a working barrister in the spin-off feature ''
Ted and Ralph Ted and Ralph are fictional characters created by Arthur Mathews and Graham Linehan, played by Paul Whitehouse and Charlie Higson in the BBC comedy sketch show '' The Fast Show''. They featured in all three series of the show, and are arguably ...
''. Whitehouse revealed on the UK chatshow ''Parkinson'' that the character was based on Andrew Rollo whom he met on a fishing trip to
Iceland Iceland ( is, Ísland; ) is a Nordic island country in the North Atlantic Ocean and in the Arctic Ocean. Iceland is the most sparsely populated country in Europe. Iceland's capital and largest city is Reykjavík, which (along with its ...
; Rollo appeared in a ''Suit You, Sir! The Inside Leg of the Fast Show'' documentary in 1999, which revealed how closely Rowley's speech resembled that of his real-life inspiration. At the end of a Christmas episode the caption revealed that he has died. "Rowley Birkin QC 1918 – 2000"; however, despite this on-screen demise he appeared in the 2011 online specials. (TV series 2–3, and online series) * Roy and Renée (Thomson and Aherne), a
northern Northern may refer to the following: Geography * North, a point in direction * Northern Europe, the northern part or region of Europe * Northern Highland, a region of Wisconsin, United States * Northern Province, Sri Lanka * Northern Range, a r ...
couple, with endless chattering from Renée and subdued nodding from her quiet, submissive husband Roy, whom she expects to agree meekly with everything she says. Roy always embarrasses her at the end of every sketch, after which he gets a stinging reprimand from his wife. She makes her last appearance in the show during the 1996 Christmas Special, when Roy's mother finally gives in to holding back the resentment towards Renée's smug attitude. (series 1–2) * Rubbish Dad (Thomson), the father and opposite of Brilliant Kid who proclaims everything to be "rubbish." He is usually only seen in an industrial scrapheap area. The only things he does like are Elvis, Hitler and
Des Lynam Desmond Michael Lynam, (born 17 September 1942) is an Irish-born television and radio presenter. In a broadcasting career spanning more than forty years, he has hosted television coverage of many of the world's major sporting events, presentin ...
. (all series) * Swiss Toni (Higson), a car salesman who, usually in the presence of his bemused trainee Paul (Rhys Thomas), compares everything to seducing and making love to a beautiful woman. The character later appeared in a spin-off sitcom, also titled ''Swiss Toni'', set in his car dealership. Swiss is one of the few non-original characters in the show (another being Tommy Cockles), having previously appeared in the second series of ''The Smell of Reeves and Mortimer'' in 1995, which was produced by Higson and featured cameos from many members of ''The Fast Show''. Charlie Higson stated that the voice was based on his own poor impersonation of
Sean Connery Sir Sean Connery (born Thomas Connery; 25 August 1930 – 31 October 2020) was a Scottish actor. He was the first actor to portray fictional British secret agent James Bond on film, starring in seven Bond films between 1962 and 1983. Origina ...
. (TV series 3 and online) *
Ted and Ralph Ted and Ralph are fictional characters created by Arthur Mathews and Graham Linehan, played by Paul Whitehouse and Charlie Higson in the BBC comedy sketch show '' The Fast Show''. They featured in all three series of the show, and are arguably ...
(Whitehouse and Higson) – repressed country squire Lord Ralph Mayhew attempts to strike up a relationship with his introverted Irish estate worker Ted, by way of subtle erotic subtexts in his conversations with him. Also the title of a one-off, hour-long spin-off feature, reprising the characters, with cameos from a few other characters. (all TV and online series) * Two Builders, who are always shown on their lunch break with one (Simon Day) telling stories of his life experiences to his working mate (Mark Williams). Catchphrase: "Did I f...", the punch-line of his story is cut off at the end of every sketch by television static noise. * "You ain't seen me, right?" (Williams), an unknown traveller who says "You ain't seen me, right?" to some minor characters in the show and sometimes the viewer. He comes up in the show in various locations, always wearing a
sheepskin coat Shearling coats are made from processed lambskin, sheepskin, or pelt. This "shearing" process creates a uniform depth of the wool fibers for a uniform feel and look. Shearling coats and garments are made from pelts by tanning them with the woo ...
, and is at one point on Chanel 9 News sitting in the sports reporter's seat. He is also seen in the background when the Brilliant Kid walks past. (all series)


Recurring characters and sketches

* Checkout Girl (Aherne), a simple and chatty young woman working behind the till at a supermarket who passes comment on every item the customer buys regardless of the personal or sensitive nature of the product: " K-Y Jelly... bit of vaginal dryness?" (series 3) * Ed Winchester ( Jeff Harding), an American reporter. He beams at the camera introduces himself, "Hi! I'm Ed Winchester!", in an upbeat voice. In one sketch, someone else (Colin McFarlane) introduced himself with "Hi! I'm Ed Winchester!" He later replied with "No I'm not. I don't know why I just said that." (series 1-2) * "Even Better Than That!" (Williams), a slack-jawed, not too bright man who comes back from the shops with something ridiculously unnecessary instead of what his wife sent him out for. Written by Bob Mortimer. (series 3) * Sir Geoffrey Norman MP (Higson), a politician who responds to all questions (however innocuous) as if he were performing on-air political damage limitation, refusing outright to answer the question, stonewalling or speaking in legal-ese to explain why he will not answer. (series 2) * Gideon Soames (Day), white-haired, posh-talking architecture and history professor, possibly a cross between
Simon Schama Sir Simon Michael Schama (; born 13 February 1945) is an English historian specialising in art history, Dutch history, Jewish history, and French history. He is a University Professor of History and Art History at Columbia University. He fi ...
and
Brian Sewell Brian Alfred Christopher Bushell Sewell (; 15 July 1931 – 19 September 2015) was an English art critic. He wrote for the ''Evening Standard'' and had an acerbic view of conceptual art and the Turner Prize. ''The Guardian'' described him as " ...
, with some elements of
Bamber Gascoigne Arthur Bamber Gascoigne (24 January 1935 – 8 February 2022) was an English television presenter and author. He was the original quizmaster on ''University Challenge'', which initially ran from 1962 to 1987. Early life and education Gasco ...
. Despite the serious tone of his speeches, their content becomes increasingly ridiculous. (series 2–3) * The Historian (Williams), a jubilant, but emotionally imbalanced man who patrols the corridors of an historic boys academy alone whilst telling tall tales about former traditions both cruel and unreasonable. (series 3) * "Six Hours In Make-Up" (Thomson), an over-the-top thespian describes his character and mentions that he needs to spend six hours being made up when actually it takes a few seconds (series 3) * Monster Monster (Whitehouse), a vampire who creeps up on a slumbering woman and gives her betting advice (series 3). The set-up is a parody of a scene from the 1922 German classic horror film ''
Nosferatu ''Nosferatu: A Symphony of Horror'' (German: ''Nosferatu – Eine Symphonie des Grauens'') is a 1922 silent German Expressionist horror film directed by F. W. Murnau and starring Max Schreck as Count Orlok, a vampire who preys on the wife ...
'', while the vampire's voice and catchphrase of "Monster, monster" are based on
Eric Hall Eric Hall (11 November 1947Elian Peltier''The New York Times'', November 23, 2020 – 16 November 2020) was a British show business and football agent known for his flamboyant public persona, quick wit, unique fashion sense, and the catchphras ...
. * Roger Nouveau: Football Fan (Thomson), a man who seems to talk a lot about football as if a true
Arsenal An arsenal is a place where arms and ammunition are made, maintained and repaired, stored, or issued, in any combination, whether privately or publicly owned. Arsenal and armoury (British English) or armory (American English) are mostl ...
supporter, but makes it glaringly obvious he knows nothing about the game. (series 3) * The Hurried Poor, a father (Williams), mother and two children only seen in extremely short sketches in which they are rushing from place to place in a panic for no apparent reason. The father is constantly shrieking at his family to "run" or "come on!" * Shagging Couple (Higson and Donna Ewin), a childless couple who are seen in the midst of sexual intercourse, much to the discomfort of their neighbours, in, among other places, a tent in a sports shop, a tree in the park, and even on a bed being carried by removal men as they move into the neighbourhood. (series 2) * Inept Zookeeper (Williams), a zookeeper who is frightened or disgusted by virtually every aspect of his job (cleaning up elephant dung, feeding the penguins, for example) and is thus rendered unable to perform his tasks properly. (series 3) * Young at heart (Whitehouse and Thomson), a group of outwardly serious and professional executives who converse in often complex financial terminology until one is distracted by an
excavator Excavators are heavy construction equipment consisting of a boom, dipper (or stick), bucket and cab on a rotating platform known as the "house". The house sits atop an undercarriage with tracks or wheels. They are a natural progression fr ...
at a building site or a cute picture in the company calendar, and start acting like little kids. (series 2) * The Unpronouncables! (Day and Higson), a parody of the black and white
Gangster film A gangster film or gangster movie is a film belonging to a genre that focuses on gangs and organized crime. It is a subgenre of crime film, that may involve large criminal organizations, or small gangs formed to perform a certain illegal act. Th ...
in which the cast have great difficulty with the 'lingo' and pronouncing their unusual nicknames. (series 1-2) * Dave Angel, Eco-Warrior (Day), an unlikely-looking environmental activist. Introduced with theme song " Moonlight Shadow". (series 3) *Andy (Day), a married man who is an office worker that rejects the women in the office whenever they encourage him. (series 1) *Trudi (Weir), a female singer who makes several appearances on Chanel 9. (all series) *Mikki Disco (Higson), a male singer who make several appearances on Chanel 9. (series 2–3). *The Dog Trainer (Eryl Maynard), a female dog trainer who tells the viewers about her dog, Quail's exercises until she tells him to do it to which Quail doesn't budge every time tells him to go again until she sheepishly says "he's never done that before" to the viewers. The final time she was seen is when she got really angry at Quail not moving an inch at an obstacle course. (series 3).


Johnny Depp

In '' Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl'',
Jack Sparrow Captain Jack Sparrow is a fictional character and the main protagonist of the '' Pirates of the Caribbean'' film series. The character was created by screenwriters Ted Elliott and Terry Rossio and is portrayed by Johnny Depp. The characteri ...
quotes the show, the Rowley Birkin line "... and then they made me their chief!". In a deleted scene of the movie, Sparrow also uses the Mark Williams catchphrase "I'll get me coat."
Johnny Depp John Christopher Depp II (born June 9, 1963) is an American actor and musician. He is the recipient of List of awards and nominations received by Johnny Depp, multiple accolades, including a Golden Globe Award and a Screen Actors Guild Awa ...
is a major fan of ''The Fast Show'' and an ardent admirer of Paul Whitehouse, whom he once described as "the greatest actor in the world". In 2000, Depp made a cameo appearance as the hapless customer in the 'Suit You, Sir' sketch in the ''Fast Show'' farewell special, and in a 2015 interview, he commented: "It was absolutely one of my proudest achievements. No question. It was one of my favourite things, to have been on the last ''Fast Show''." Depp's 2015 movie ''
Mortdecai ''Mortdecai'' is a series of comic thriller novels written by English author Kyril Bonfiglioli. The book series deals with the picaresque adventures of a dissolute aristocratic art dealer named Charlie Mortdecai, accompanied on his adventures by ...
'' features Paul Whitehouse in a minor role and has been noted for alluding to ''Fast Show'' characters.


Filming locations

A significant proportion of ''The Fast Show'' was shot externally, unusually for a sketch show. Early on in the series much of this filming was done in and around the North East of England:
County Durham County Durham ( ), officially simply Durham,UK General Acts 1997 c. 23Lieutenancies Act 1997 Schedule 1(3). From legislation.gov.uk, retrieved 6 April 2022. is a ceremonial county in North East England.North East Assembly �About North East E ...
,
Tyne and Wear Tyne and Wear () is a metropolitan county in North East England, situated around the mouths of the rivers Tyne and Wear. It was created in 1974, by the Local Government Act 1972, along with five metropolitan boroughs of Gateshead, Newcas ...
,
Northumberland Northumberland () is a county in Northern England, one of two counties in England which border with Scotland. Notable landmarks in the county include Alnwick Castle, Bamburgh Castle, Hadrian's Wall and Hexham Abbey. It is bordered by land ...
,
Teesside Teesside () is a built-up area around the River Tees in the north of England, split between County Durham and North Yorkshire. The name was initially used as a county borough in the North Riding of Yorkshire. Historically a hub for heavy manu ...
and also
North Yorkshire North Yorkshire is the largest ceremonial county (lieutenancy area) in England, covering an area of . Around 40% of the county is covered by national parks, including most of the Yorkshire Dales and the North York Moors. It is one of four co ...
. Locations included: *
Alnwick Alnwick ( ) is a market town in Northumberland, England, of which it is the traditional county town. The population at the 2011 Census was 8,116. The town is on the south bank of the River Aln, south of Berwick-upon-Tweed and the Scottish bor ...
*
Ashington Ashington is a town and civil parish in Northumberland, England, with a population of 27,864 at the 2011 Census. It was once a centre of the coal mining industry. The town is north of Newcastle upon Tyne, west of the A189 and bordered to the ...
, Northumberland – at least two scenes involving Unlucky Alf and one involving Brilliant Kid were filmed on Station Road there. *
Barnard Castle Barnard Castle (, ) is a market town on the north bank of the River Tees, in County Durham, Northern England. The town is named after and built around a medieval castle ruin. The town's Bowes Museum's has an 18th-century Silver Swan automato ...
- Barnard Castle Boarding School was used. *
Darlington Darlington is a market town in the Borough of Darlington, County Durham, England. The River Skerne flows through the town; it is a tributary of the River Tees. The Tees itself flows south of the town. In the 19th century, Darlington underw ...
– the childhood home of Jim Moir ( Vic Reeves) whose long-term comedy partner
Bob Mortimer Robert Renwick Mortimer (born 23 May 1959) is an English comedian, podcast presenter and actor. He is known for his work with Vic Reeves as part of their Vic and Bob comedy double act, and more recently the '' Mortimer & Whitehouse: Gone Fishing ...
was one of the writers. "The Running Family" were shown around various locations in the town centre, including the Cornmill Centre The Cornmill and High Street were in scenes involving Brilliant Kid. Binns Department Store was also featured in sketches involving Arabella Weir. *
Durham Durham most commonly refers to: *Durham, England, a cathedral city and the county town of County Durham *County Durham, an English county * Durham County, North Carolina, a county in North Carolina, United States *Durham, North Carolina, a city in N ...
– the marketplace was featured in scenes involving Brilliant Kid. *
Hartlepool Hartlepool () is a seaside and port town in County Durham, England. It is the largest settlement and administrative centre of the Borough of Hartlepool. With an estimated population of 90,123, it is the second-largest settlement in County D ...
– one Unlucky Alf scene had him sitting in the empty Rink End Stand of Hartlepool United's ground, Victoria Park. Also, one Ed Winchester scene was in front of the Mill House Stand. Some of the Brilliant Kid scenes were also filmed at nearby Seal Sands. *
Keld, North Yorkshire Keld is a village in the English county of North Yorkshire. It is in Swaledale, in the district of Richmondshire and the Yorkshire Dales National Park. The name derives from the Viking word ''Kelda'' meaning a spring and the village was once c ...
– the campsite was used in a Dave Angel scene. * Langley Park – Railway Street was used in Unlucky Alf scenes. *
Middlesbrough Middlesbrough ( ) is a town on the southern bank of the River Tees in North Yorkshire, England. It is near the North York Moors national park. It is the namesake and main town of its local borough council area. Until the early 1800s, the ...
– its docks were used in "Chip Cobbs" scenes, others scenes were shot on the Transporter Bridge and the
Riverside Stadium The Riverside Stadium is a football stadium in Middlesbrough, England, which has been the home of Middlesbrough since it opened in 1995. Its current capacity is 34,742, all seated, although there is provisional planning permission in place t ...
. frequently used in other scenes. *
Newcastle upon Tyne Newcastle upon Tyne ( RP: , ), or simply Newcastle, is a city and metropolitan borough in Tyne and Wear, England. The city is located on the River Tyne's northern bank and forms the largest part of the Tyneside built-up area. Newcastle is ...
– including the "Shore Leave" sketch, the scene where Chris the Crafty Cockney steals the woman's suitcases (shot at Newcastle station), and some of the Sir Geoffrey Norman MP sketches, such as the one where he is pulled over by a policeman for speeding and the one where he refuses to pay the taxi driver after getting out of the car (which was shot outside the main entrance to Newcastle station). One Ed Winchester scene was near Monument station. One scene from the Brilliant Kid showed him in Exhibition Park. Many scenes involving Janine Carr, filmed in greyscale, used the backdrop of the concrete flyover and underpasses of the junction of the A167(M) and the B1318 of the Great North Road in
Jesmond Jesmond is a suburb of Newcastle upon Tyne, situated to the east of the Town Moor. Jesmond is considered to be one of the most affluent suburbs of Newcastle upon Tyne, with higher average house prices than most other areas of the city. H ...
. A few scenes were filmed inside the
Newcastle City Library Newcastle City Library (also known as the Charles Avison Building) is a library in the city centre of Newcastle upon Tyne, United Kingdom. Completed on 3 March 2009, the building opened on 7 June 2009, and is the city's main public library. The ...
(which has since been demolished and a new library building has replaced it). * Ormesby Hall – background in early Ted and Ralph scenes. *
Redcar Redcar is a seaside town on the Yorkshire Coast in the Redcar and Cleveland unitary authority in the county of North Yorkshire, England. It is located east of Middlesbrough. The Teesside built-up area's Redcar subdivision had a populatio ...
– scenes with Brilliant Kid walking along the beach. Also Mark Williams appears in a caravan park near South Gare, with the steelworks in the distance. *
Richmond Richmond most often refers to: * Richmond, Virginia, the capital of Virginia, United States * Richmond, London, a part of London * Richmond, North Yorkshire, a town in England * Richmond, British Columbia, a city in Canada * Richmond, Californi ...
– its marketplace was used in Ted and Ralph's trip to the shops. * Scotch Corner – its garage used in Swiss Toni's early scenes. *
Seaton Carew Seaton Carew is a seaside resort and civil parish in the Borough of Hartlepool in County Durham, England. It had an estimated population of 6,018. The area is named after a Norman French family called Carou who owned lands in the area and sett ...
– one "You ain't seen me, right?" scene had the main character sitting on a child's ride in one of the seafront amusement arcades. *
The Spanish City The Spanish City is a dining and leisure centre in Whitley Bay, a seaside town in North Tyneside, Tyne & Wear, England. Erected as a smaller version of Blackpool's Pleasure Beach, it opened in 1910 as a concert hall, restaurant, roof garden an ...
,
Whitley Bay Whitley Bay is a seaside town in the North Tyneside borough in Tyne and Wear, England. It formerly governed as part of Northumberland and has been part of Tyne and Wear since 1974. It is part of the wider Tyneside built-up area, being around e ...
,
Tyne and Wear Tyne and Wear () is a metropolitan county in North East England, situated around the mouths of the rivers Tyne and Wear. It was created in 1974, by the Local Government Act 1972, along with five metropolitan boroughs of Gateshead, Newcas ...
– a number of scenes involving Brilliant Kid. * Stockton On Tees – Swiss Toni scenes, filmed at a car showroom on Norton Road. *
Washington Washington commonly refers to: * Washington (state), United States * Washington, D.C., the capital of the United States ** A metonym for the federal government of the United States ** Washington metropolitan area, the metropolitan area centered o ...
. Also for the third series the production extended abroad to
Iceland Iceland ( is, Ísland; ) is a Nordic island country in the North Atlantic Ocean and in the Arctic Ocean. Iceland is the most sparsely populated country in Europe. Iceland's capital and largest city is Reykjavík, which (along with its ...
: * Scenes with Brilliant Kid and Billy Bleach were shot with Iceland's volcanic landscapes, waterfalls and hot springs in the background.


Transmissions


Related programming

At the conclusion of the third series, there was a one-off spinoff, ''
Ted & Ralph Ted and Ralph are fictional characters created by Arthur Mathews and Graham Linehan, played by Paul Whitehouse and Charlie Higson in the BBC comedy sketch show ''The Fast Show''. They featured in all three series of the show, and are arguably amo ...
'', which aired on 27 December 1998 on BBC Two. They were the first characters to have their own spinoff show outside the sketches. In 1999, The Fast Show did a number of adverts for
Holsten Pils Holsten Pils is a German brand of lager, a pilsner, brewed in the UK in the Mungo district of Northampton by Carlsberg Group. History It was first developed in the north of West Germany in 1953. Carlsberg bought Holsten Brewery (Holsten-Brauere ...
. Ken and Kenneth, Chanel 9 news with Kolothos Apollonia and Poutremos Poutra-Poutros, a Mexican band, a Chanel 9 cooking segment with Mark Williams playing a chef, Jesse, Bob Fleming and The Unpronounceables. In 2001, Ron Manager, Tommy and the interviewer fronted a comedy panel game show on
Sky 1 Sky One was a British pay television channel operated and owned by Sky Group (a division of Comcast). Originally launched on 26 April 1982 as Satellite Television, it was Europe's first satellite and non- terrestrial channel. From 31 July 1989, ...
called "Jumpers for Goalposts". The interviewer was the presenter while Ron Manager and Tommy were the resident team captains. '' Swiss Toni'' featured the eponymous character in a stand-alone series broadcast on
BBC Three BBC Three is a British free-to-air public broadcast television channel owned and operated by the BBC. It was first launched on 9 February 2003 with programmes targeting 16 to 34-year-olds, covering all genres including animation, comedy, cur ...
in 2003 and 2004. The first three episodes of the first series were repeated on
BBC One BBC One is a British free-to-air public broadcast television network owned and operated by the BBC. It is the corporation's flagship network and is known for broadcasting mainstream programming, which includes BBC News television bulletins, ...
. In 2006, Higson and Whitehouse produced and performed in '' Down the Line'', a spoof talkback show for BBC Radio 4, hosted by Rhys Thomas, which featured many of the regular ''Fast Show'' cast, including Higson, Whitehouse, Simon Day, Arabella Weir and Felix Dexter. Further series were broadcast in 2007, 2008, 2011 and 2013. A follow-on TV series, ''
Bellamy's People ''Bellamy's People'', also known as ''Bellamy's People of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland'', is a British comedy show first broadcast on BBC Two as an eight-episode series. The show is a spin-off from the BBC Radio 4 show ...
'', was broadcast in 2010.


Online series

Speaking on the
BBC Two BBC Two is a British free-to-air public broadcast television network owned and operated by the BBC. It covers a wide range of subject matter, with a remit "to broadcast programmes of depth and substance" in contrast to the more mainstream a ...
show '' Something for the Weekend'' on 9 September 2007, Higson mentioned the upcoming DVD boxed set release and that a reunion of some sort to help promote it was being considered. This took place at the Dominion Theatre in London on Sunday 4 November, and was a collection of some new sketches, videos of cast favourites and performances of classic sketches (including the return of Ed Winchester). Higson and Whitehouse stated they were working on a film script which would feature the ''Fast Show'' team, but would not have any of the characters from the show. A new online-only series was commissioned in a sponsorship deal with
Foster's Lager Foster's Lager is an internationally-distributed brand of lager. It is owned by the international brewing group Asahi Group Holdings, and is brewed under licence in a number of countries, including its biggest market, the UK, where the Euro ...
, and aired beginning 14 November 2011; the trailer was released on 9 November on Foster's YouTube Channel. New episodes featured the original cast with the exception of Mark Williams, who declined involvement in the project due to scheduling clashes.


Home media releases


VHS Releases


DVD Releases


VHS/DVD Edits

Series 1, Episode 1 *The first Roy & Renée sketch is removed from the 2007 ''The Ultimate Fast Show Collection'' DVD boxset, and only included on the original Series 1 2002 DVD release. *The band
Level 42 Level 42 is an English jazz-funk band formed on the Isle of Wight in 1979. They had a number of UK and worldwide hits during the 1980s and 1990s. Their highest-charting single in the UK was " Lessons in Love", which reached number three on th ...
performing their song " Forever Now" during the end credits (after the "Comedy
Vicar A vicar (; Latin: '' vicarius'') is a representative, deputy or substitute; anyone acting "in the person of" or agent for a superior (compare "vicarious" in the sense of "at second hand"). Linguistically, ''vicar'' is cognate with the English pre ...
" sketch) is included on the original Series 1 2002 DVD release, but was removed from ''The Ultimate Fast Show Collection'' DVD boxset. Series 2, Episode 1 *On-screen captions and graphics for various sketches (such as those on "Jesse's Diets", "Return of the Unpronouncables", "Rowley Berkin Q.C.", etc.) for the entire Series 2 are removed from the 2007 ''The Ultimate Fast Show Collection'' DVD boxset. However, Episode 1 from the original Series 2 2003 DVD release retains all these. All VHS and DVD releases of Series 2 have added "Chanel 9"-style episode numbers over the first sketch of each episode. *Ken and Kenneth sketch signature background music " Some Enchanted Evening" performed by The Mantovani Orchestra has been replaced with similar sounding music for both the 2003 Series 2 release and the 2007 ''The Ultimate Fast Show Collection'' DVD boxset and ''The Fast Show 2'' Audio CD. *"I'll Get Me Coat" sketch originally included
Simply Red Simply Red are a British soul and pop band formed in Manchester in 1985. The lead vocalist of the band is singer and songwriter Mick Hucknall, who, by the time the band initially disbanded in 2010, was the only original member left. Since t ...
's song "
Fairground Fairground most typically refers to a permanent space that hosts fairs. Fairground, Fairgrounds, Fair Ground or Fair Grounds may also refer to: Places Canada * Fairground, Ontario, a community United States * Fairground, St. Louis, a neighbo ...
" playing in the background, but has been replaced with similar-sounding instrumental music for the 2007 ''The Ultimate Fast Show Collection'' DVD boxset. The original Series 2 2003 DVD release retains the original song. Series 2, Episode 3 *All sketches featuring Fred Halibut & His Little Banjolele (played by Mark Williams) have been removed due to music rights as the character (despite the 1940s
Music hall Music hall is a type of British theatrical entertainment that was popular from the early Victorian era, beginning around 1850. It faded away after 1918 as the halls rebranded their entertainment as variety. Perceptions of a distinction in Br ...
setting) is singing songs by
Prince A prince is a male ruler (ranked below a king, grand prince, and grand duke) or a male member of a monarch's or former monarch's family. ''Prince'' is also a title of nobility (often highest), often hereditary, in some European states. ...
. Songs sung are "
Gett Off "Gett Off" is a song written and produced by American musician Prince for his thirteenth album, ''Diamonds and Pearls'' (1991). The album was his first with his backing band the New Power Generation. "Gett Off" was released as the lead single fr ...
", "
Cream Cream is a dairy product composed of the higher-fat layer skimmed from the top of milk before homogenization. In un-homogenized milk, the fat, which is less dense, eventually rises to the top. In the industrial production of cream, this process ...
", " Darling Nikki" and "
Sexy MF "Sexy MF" is a song by American musician Prince and the New Power Generation, released as a single from their 1992 album '' Love Symbol''. The music and most of the lyrics were composed by Prince, while Seacer came up with the chorus and the song ...
". *During "''The Cute Disabled Man''" sketch (a parody of ''
Forrest Gump ''Forrest Gump'' is a 1994 American comedy-drama film directed by Robert Zemeckis and written by Eric Roth. It is based on the 1986 novel of the same name by Winston Groom and stars Tom Hanks, Robin Wright, Gary Sinise, Mykelti Williamson ...
)'',
Bruce Springsteen Bruce Frederick Joseph Springsteen (born September 23, 1949) is an American singer and songwriter. He has released 21 studio albums, most of which feature his backing band, the E Street Band. Originally from the Jersey Shore, he is an originato ...
's " Born in the U.S.A." has been replaced by instrumental rock music. Series 2, Episode 4 *The broadcast version has an extra Newlyweds sketch during the end credits, which was removed from home media releases. Series 2, Episode 5 *The Chanel 9 ''
A Question of Sport ''Question of Sport'' (previously ''A Question of Sport'') is a British television sports quiz show produced and broadcast by the BBC. It is the "world's longest running TV sports quiz". Following a pilot episode in December 1968, broadcast on ...
'' parody butchery sequence is extended by 7 seconds on DVD compared to the original broadcast version. 1996 Christmas Special *The original broadcast version features
George Michael George Michael (born Georgios Kyriacos Panayiotou; 25 June 1963 – 25 December 2016) was an English singer and songwriter. He is considered one of the most significant cultural icons of the MTV generation and is one of the best-selling music ...
's "
Careless Whisper "Careless Whisper" is a song written by George Michael and Andrew Ridgeley. Released on the 1984 Wham! album '' Make It Big'', the single release was credited either to ''Wham! featuring George Michael'' (in North America and several other coun ...
" played in the background during one of the Colin Hunt sketches, which has been replaced with an alternate instrumental track on the Extended Version. Some broadcasts have since used either the alternate music or not used any music at all. You Ain't Seen These, Right! *The original broadcast version features
Louis Armstrong Louis Daniel Armstrong (August 4, 1901 – July 6, 1971), nicknamed "Satchmo", "Satch", and "Pops", was an American trumpeter and Singing, vocalist. He was among the most influential figures in jazz. His career spanned five decades and se ...
's version of "
What a Wonderful World "What a Wonderful World" is a song written by Bob Thiele (as "George Douglas") and George David Weiss. It was first recorded by Louis Armstrong and released in 1967 as a single. It topped the pop chart in the United Kingdom, but performed poor ...
" played at the end of the "I'm not Pissed" family sketch as they contemplate their New Year's resolution of " giving up the drink", which has been replaced home media releases with a cover of the song by another artist.


"You Ain't Seen These, Right!"

"You Ain't Seen These, Right!" was a one-off programme, shown during BBC 2's ''Fast Show Night'', featuring various sketches which were filmed, predominantly from the third series, that did not make it onto the final show. Some of these were: * Mid-Life Crisis Man (Higson), a "henpecked", scruffy loser who leaves his wife and begins dating a beautiful young woman. The other members of his golf club are initially dismissive of him as a sad old man particularly when he begins wearing unsuitable clothes, getting tattoos and having his belly button pierced. They become much more interested however when his girlfriend invites one of her equally attractive friends to the lads' night out. * Ranting Man (Williams), a chain-smoking car driver who rants about anything and everything through his wound-down window. He drives around
Harlesden Harlesden is a district in the London Borough of Brent, North West London. Located north of the Grand Union Canal and Wormwood Scrubs, the Harrow Road flows through the centre of the area which goes eastwards to Central London and west toward ...
, London. A study in
road rage Road rage is aggressive or angry behavior exhibited by motorists. These behaviors include rude and verbal insults, yelling, physical threats or dangerous driving methods targeted at other drivers, pedestrians or cyclists in an effort to intimid ...
. * The King (Day), a medieval king who "loves being king" because he gets to boss everyone about. * A middle-aged man (Thomson), who always finds an excuse to leave the room as soon as the conversation gets round to "women's things." * Shagging Man (Whitehouse), who responds to almost every question, accusation and situation with the phrase "Sorry, but I was up all night, shagging." * Dave Morris (Thomson), who spray-paints graffiti on a police station wall and inside an art gallery, but then claims it was done by someone else. * Andy (Day), a married man who rejects the other ladies in the office and speaks to his wife, Ruth, to say that for the last time he is not having an affair, which was originally written for Series 1 until it got delayed for broadcast on this special. * Brilliant Kid (Whitehouse), who gets told to 'shut it!' by a stroppy girl (Aherne) every time he tries talking about girls, which was originally written for either Series 1 or 2 until it got delayed for broadcast on this special. An extended 50-minute version of the original 30-minute special was included in the UK edition of the VHS boxed-set of Series 3 and on the seven-disc ''Ultimate Fast Show'' DVD boxed-set.


References


External links

* * * * {{DEFAULTSORT:Fast Show, The 1994 British television series debuts 2014 British television series endings 1990s British television sketch shows 2000s British television sketch shows 2010s British television sketch shows BAFTA winners (television series) BBC television sketch shows British television series revived after cancellation English-language television shows