"Rape Me" is a song by the American
rock band
Nirvana, written by vocalist and guitarist
Kurt Cobain
Kurt Donald Cobain (February 20, 1967 – ) was an American musician. He was the lead vocalist, guitarist, primary songwriter, and a founding member of the grunge band Nirvana (band), Nirvana. Through his angsty songwriting and anti-establis ...
. It is the fourth song on the band's third and final studio album, ''
In Utero'', released in September 1993.
Often interpreted as a commentary on fame, "Rape Me" was written shortly before the release of the band's breakthrough album ''
Nevermind'', and was intended to be a lyrically literal anti-
rape
Rape is a type of sexual assault involving sexual intercourse, or other forms of sexual penetration, carried out against a person without consent. The act may be carried out by physical force, coercion, abuse of authority, or against a person ...
song.
[Steinke, Darcey. "Smashing Their Heads On That Punk Rock". ''Spin''. October 1993.] However, the song's bridge was written several months later, and does contain lyrics that reference the struggles Cobain and his wife,
Courtney Love, faced with the media following Nirvana's mainstream success.
The song's title and lyrics led to
MTV blocking Nirvana from performing it at the
1992 MTV Video Music Awards, before it had been released, and also contributed to ''In Utero'' initially not being sold by American
big-box stores Walmart
Walmart Inc. (; formerly Wal-Mart Stores, Inc.) is an American multinational retail corporation that operates a chain of hypermarkets (also called supercenters), discount department stores, and grocery stores in the United States and 23 other ...
and
K-Mart.
"Rape Me" was released as the album's second single in December 1993, packaged as a double
A-side
The A-side and B-side are the two sides of vinyl records and cassettes, and the terms have often been printed on the labels of two-sided music recordings. The A-side of a single usually features a recording that its artist, producer, or ...
with "
All Apologies". It reached number 32 on the
UK Singles Chart, and was the band's final single before
Cobain's suicide in April 1994.
Early history
"Rape Me" was written by Cobain on an acoustic guitar in
Los Angeles
Los Angeles, often referred to by its initials L.A., is the List of municipalities in California, most populous city in the U.S. state of California, and the commercial, Financial District, Los Angeles, financial, and Culture of Los Angeles, ...
in May 1991, around the time the band's second album, ''
Nevermind'', was being mixed. It was first performed live on June 18, 1991, at
The Catalyst in
Santa Cruz. The earliest live versions of the song featured a guitar solo instead of a bridge.
[Gaar, p. 19]
The song's lyrics led to controversy even before it had been officially released. The band had wanted to play it during their appearance at the
1992 MTV Video Music Awards, but according to Nirvana manager
Danny Goldberg in his 2019 Cobain biography ''
Serving the Servant'', MTV president
Judy McGrath was worried that the song "would make it seem like MTV was normalizing rape." Goldberg recalled reminding McGrath on the phone of Cobain's "commitment to
feminism
Feminism is a range of socio-political movements and ideology, ideologies that aim to define and establish the political, economic, personal, and social gender equality, equality of the sexes. Feminism holds the position that modern soci ...
" and assured her that "Rape Me" was an anti-rape song, like "
Polly" on ''Nevermind'', but said McGrath "wasn't having it" and wanted the band to play their latest single, "
Lithium
Lithium (from , , ) is a chemical element; it has chemical symbol, symbol Li and atomic number 3. It is a soft, silvery-white alkali metal. Under standard temperature and pressure, standard conditions, it is the least dense metal and the ...
," instead. The band eventually agreed, but Cobain still played a few seconds of "Rape Me" at the start of the performance, which resulted in the live broadcast almost going to commercial. In ''Serving the Servant'', Goldberg refuted common reports that the network threatened to fire Amy Finnerty, an MTV employee and friend of the band, or boycott other artists signed to Geffen Records, if Nirvana played "Rape Me", saying that "the MTV people were under a lot of pressure to get good ratings, but they weren't bullies, just noodges."
"Rape Me" was first recorded in the studio in October 1992, during a two-day demo session with
Jack Endino at
Word of Mouth in
Seattle
Seattle ( ) is the most populous city in the U.S. state of Washington and in the Pacific Northwest region of North America. With a population of 780,995 in 2024, it is the 18th-most populous city in the United States. The city is the cou ...
,
Washington. Two takes of the song were recorded, one of which was instrumental, the other of which featured lead vocals by Cobain and backing vocals by drummer
Dave Grohl. Cobain was holding his then-infant daughter
Frances Bean Cobain on his lap when he recorded his vocals on the second take, and she can be heard crying on the recording. This version of the song was released on the Nirvana rarities box set, ''
With the Lights Out'', in November 2004, and on the compilation album ''
Sliver: The Best of the Box'' in November 2005.
''In Utero''
The final studio version of "Rape Me" was recorded in February 1993 by
Steve Albini at
Pachyderm Studio in
Cannon Falls, Minnesota, for the band's third and final studio album, ''
In Utero''. The instruments for the song were recorded on February 15. The following day, Cobain completed his vocals for the album during a reported six-hour session.
According to Albini, Cobain's screaming during the song's ending was intentionally recorded so that it "just overwhelms the band and becomes this really uncomfortable presence." However, the album's more abrasive vocals in general were softened in the mastered version.
Post-''In Utero''
On September 25, 1993, the band performed the song, along with "
Heart-Shaped Box," on ''
Saturday Night Live
''Saturday Night Live'' (''SNL'') is an American Late night television in the United States, late-night live television, live sketch comedy variety show created by Lorne Michaels and developed by Michaels and Dick Ebersol that airs on NBC. The ...
'' at
NBC Studios in
New York City
New York, often called New York City (NYC), is the most populous city in the United States, located at the southern tip of New York State on one of the world's largest natural harbors. The city comprises five boroughs, each coextensive w ...
. It was the band's first show with second guitarist
Pat Smear. The song was again performed on television on February 4, 1994 for the show ''Nulle Part Ailleurs'' in
Paris, France
Paris () is the Capital city, capital and List of communes in France with over 20,000 inhabitants, largest city of France. With an estimated population of 2,048,472 residents in January 2025 in an area of more than , Paris is the List of ci ...
.
The final live performance of "Rape Me" was at Nirvana's last concert, at Terminal 1 of
Munich-Riem Airport in
Munich, Germany on March 1, 1994.
Composition and lyrics
Music
The song's instrumental opening bars, which feature Cobain using pick scratching while playing the verse chord progression, has led to frequent comparisons to the guitar riff of the band's 1991 breakthrough single, "
Smells Like Teen Spirit." Will Bryant of ''
Pitchfork
A pitchfork or hay fork is an agricultural tool used to pitch loose material, such as hay, straw, manure, or leaves. It has a long handle and usually two to five thin tines designed to efficiently move such materials.
The term is also applie ...
'' wrote that "the four-chord riff that drags the song through the motions is an almost direct inversion of the famous 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' riff," while Cobain biographer
Charles R. Cross described the song as having "the same catchy soft/loud dynamic as "Teen Spirit," which "created a perfect Cobain aesthetic – beautiful, haunting and disturbing." "Rape Me" was written after "Smells Like Teen Spirit," but before ''Nevermind'' had been released.
Lyrics
"Rape Me" is an anti-
rape
Rape is a type of sexual assault involving sexual intercourse, or other forms of sexual penetration, carried out against a person without consent. The act may be carried out by physical force, coercion, abuse of authority, or against a person ...
song, written from the point of view of the victim. As Cobain explained to ''
Spin's''
Darcey Steinke in 1993, "It's like she's saying, 'Rape me, go ahead, rape me, beat me. You'll never kill me. I'll survive this and I'm gonna fucking rape you one of these days and you won't even know it.
Gillian G. Garr described the song's lyrics as "part submissive invitation, part defiant taunt, a mix that confused and disturbed many listeners", and led to Cobain frequently having to explain the song's meaning.
In a 1993 ''
Rolling Stone
''Rolling Stone'' is an American monthly magazine that focuses on music, politics, and popular culture. It was founded in San Francisco, California, in 1967 by Jann Wenner and the music critic Ralph J. Gleason.
The magazine was first known fo ...
'' interview, Cobain addressed the song's controversy, saying that he had "gone back and forth between regretting it and trying to defend myself," and that he "was trying to write a song that supported women and dealt with the issue of rape." As he explained to interviewer
David Fricke:
When asked by
MUCH's Erica Ehm in an August 1993 interview how the band was helping to raise awareness about sexism, Cobain replied, "By writing songs as blunt as 'Rape Me.'" He stated that the lyrics were meant to be so direct that no one could misinterpret the song's meaning.
American musician
Tori Amos commented on the song in a 1994 interview with the ''
NME
''New Musical Express'' (''NME'') is a British music, film, gaming and culture website, bimonthly magazine, and brand. Founded as a newspaper in 1952, with the publication being referred to as a "Rock music, rock inkie", the ''NME'' would be ...
'', saying that she "thought it was very clear what it was about....It's a defiant song. But the scariest thing to a rape victim are the words 'rape me'. When I first heard it I broke out in a cold sweat, but when you get over that you realize he's turning it back on people." In 1996, Jim Dillon,
reverend
The Reverend (abbreviated as The Revd, The Rev'd or The Rev) is an honorific style (form of address), style given to certain (primarily Western Christian, Western) Christian clergy and Christian minister, ministers. There are sometimes differen ...
of the hoaxical
Church of Kurt Cobain, stated that "in essence, the real message
f "Rape Me"is one of a Christian theme – treat me the way you want me to treat you".
The song has also been interpreted as an attack on the press for its perceived mistreatment of Courtney Love. While most of the song was written before ''Nevermind'' was released, the bridge, which was written later, contains lyrics that address his occasionally contentious relationship with the press.
As Cobain explained to Nirvana biographer
Michael Azerrad, "It was actually about rape ... but now I could definitely use it as an example of my life for the past six months or year, easily."
In line with this interpretation, Azerrad suggested that the chorus lyric "I'm not the only one" was Cobain's way of saying that Love and their infant daughter,
Frances Bean Cobain, were being hurt along with him by the press and public attention.
According to Azerrad, the bridge lyric "My favorite inside source" was a reference to the manager of an unnamed Seattle band Cobain and Love suspected of being anonymously interviewed for a controversial ''
Vanity Fair'' profile of the couple published in September 1992.
Release
"Rape Me" was released as a
double A-side single with "All Apologies" on December 6, 1993 on CD, cassette, and 7" and 12" vinyl record formats.
[Gaar, Gillian G. "Verse Chorus Verse: The Recording History of Nirvana". ''Goldmine''. February 14, 1997.] The single was not released commercially in the United States.
The song was relabeled "Waif Me" on the censored
Walmart
Walmart Inc. (; formerly Wal-Mart Stores, Inc.) is an American multinational retail corporation that operates a chain of hypermarkets (also called supercenters), discount department stores, and grocery stores in the United States and 23 other ...
and
Kmart version of ''In Utero'', released in March 1994. The chain stores had originally refused to carry the album because of the song's title, as well as the fetus collage on the back cover, which was also edited. Cobain had originally wanted to retitle the song "Sexually Assault Me," but decided on the meaningless title "Waif Me," knowing that another four-letter word was required in order to make a quick graphic change. The song's uncensored title was listed in the booklet, and the recording remained the same. Cobain defended the band's decision to release a censored version of the album by explaining, "One of the main reasons I signed to a major label was so people would be able to buy our records at Kmart. In some towns, that's the only place kids can buy records."
In November 1993, "Rape Me" was voted the third "Most Wanted to be Heard" song by listeners of the
Hawaii
Hawaii ( ; ) is an island U.S. state, state of the United States, in the Pacific Ocean about southwest of the U.S. mainland. One of the two Non-contiguous United States, non-contiguous U.S. states (along with Alaska), it is the only sta ...
Free Radio. In Israel, it was voted in at number 15 on the
IBA's "Voice of Israel" singles chart.
Critical reception
In his ''Rolling Stone'' review of ''In Utero'', Fricke wrote that "'Rape Me' opens as a disquieting whisper, Cobain intoning the title verse in a battered croon, which sets you up beautifully to get blind-sided by the explosive hook line." Phil Alexander of ''
Kerrang!
''Kerrang!'' is a British music webzine and quarterly magazine that primarily covers rock, punk and heavy metal music. Since 2017, the magazine has been published by Wasted Talent Ltd (the same company that owns electronic music publication ...
'' noted that "Kurt kickstarts Rape Me with a familiar and doubtlessly intended …Teen Spirit shuffle...
ndripple
with Kurt's poignant observations, allowing fleeting glimpses at his anger and frustration without ever resorting to the trite and obvious." David Browne of ''
Entertainment Weekly
''Entertainment Weekly'' (sometimes abbreviated as ''EW'') is an American online magazine, digital-only entertainment magazine based in New York City, published by Dotdash Meredith, that covers film, television, music, Broadway theatre, books, ...
'' wrote that "the gripping 'Rape Me' opens with the chords of "Teen Spirit"...and builds into a furious rant with lyrics as dumb as anything on a
death-metal anthem ("My favorite inside source/I’ll kiss your open sores"). All of this is more articulate than any
Soundgarden
Soundgarden was an American rock band formed in Seattle, Washington, in 1984 by singer and drummer Chris Cornell, lead guitarist Kim Thayil, and bassist Hiro Yamamoto. Cornell switched to rhythm guitar in 1985, replaced on drums initially ...
lyric, but too often, Cobain just comes off sounding petulant."
Criticism
"Rape Me" has occasionally received criticism for its intentionally blunt handling of sensitive subject matter. John Mulvey of the ''NME'' wrote that "while you can't doubt Cobain's personal political correctness, there's a distinct moral dubiousness about welding the words 'RAPE ME!' to ''In Utero''s best sing-along chorus." ''Pitchfork's'' Will Bryant wrote that the song, despite its victim-empowering intent, "comes off as a shallow and transparent attempt to court controversy."
In 2019,
Jenna Bush Hager revealed that her father,
George W. Bush
George Walker Bush (born July 6, 1946) is an American politician and businessman who was the 43rd president of the United States from 2001 to 2009. A member of the Bush family and the Republican Party (United States), Republican Party, he i ...
, prior to becoming U.S. President, broke one of her Nirvana CDs due to the lyrics of "a really bad song" implied to be "Rape Me."
Legacy
In 1999, "Rape Me" was voted number 90 in ''Kerrang!''s ''100 Greatest Rock Tracks Ever!''. In 2015, ''Rolling Stone'' placed it at number 31 on their ranking of 102 Nirvana songs, with Julianne Escobedo Shepherd calling it "the closest to an actual
Bikini Kill
Bikini Kill is an American punk rock band formed in Olympia, Washington, in October 1990. The group originally consisted of singer and songwriter Kathleen Hanna, guitarist Billy Karren, bassist Kathi Wilcox, and drummer Tobi Vail.
The band pio ...
song that
obain would ever write, using the lyrics as a woman-empowering taunt to show would-be rapists that their victims' spirits would not be tamped." In 2019, ''
The Guardian
''The Guardian'' is a British daily newspaper. It was founded in Manchester in 1821 as ''The Manchester Guardian'' and changed its name in 1959, followed by a move to London. Along with its sister paper, ''The Guardian Weekly'', ''The Guardi ...
'' ranked it at number 17 on their list of 'Nirvana's 20 greatest songs'.
"Rape Me" was re-released on both of Nirvana's greatest hits albums, ''
Nirvana'' (2002) and ''
Icon
An icon () is a religious work of art, most commonly a painting, in the cultures of the Eastern Orthodox, Oriental Orthodox, Catholic Church, Catholic, and Lutheranism, Lutheran churches. The most common subjects include Jesus, Mary, mother of ...
'' (2010).
Music video
According to a 1993 ''
Chicago Sun-Times
The ''Chicago Sun-Times'' is a daily nonprofit newspaper published in Chicago, Illinois, United States. Since 2022, it is the flagship paper of Chicago Public Media, and has long held the second largest circulation among Chicago newspaper ...
'' article by
Jim DeRogatis, Cobain was told that MTV were "squeamish" about a potential "Rape Me" music video, which played a role in the band's decision to release "Heart-Shaped Box" as ''In Utero's'' lead single instead. As DeRogatis wrote, "Rape Me" was "the catchiest
ongon the album; it isn't hard to imagine it becoming a hit - and a
Madonna
Madonna Louise Ciccone ( ; born August 16, 1958) is an American singer, songwriter, record producer, and actress. Referred to as the "Queen of Pop", she has been recognized for her continual reinvention and versatility in music production, ...
-size scandal."
Ultimately no music video was made for the song, although two treatments were published posthumously in Cobain's ''
Journals'' in 2002.
[Gaar, Gillian G. (2006). ]
Nirvana's In Utero
' Bloomsbury Publishing USA. Retrieved August 8, 2016. They included scenes set in a prison, footage of flowers and seahorses as well as a man being prepared for a
gynecological exam.
A 23-page "Rape Me" music video script, listing Jeffery Plansker as director, sold on eBay in January 2003 for $620.
In 1999, the ''Saturday Night Live'' version of "Rape Me" began being aired as a music video on
MTV2 to promote the album ''Saturday Night Live: The Musical Performances, Volume 2'', on which it appeared as the opening track.
Video of the performance was released on the DVD of the same name.
Accolades
Track listings
"Rape Me" was released as a
double A-side with "
All Apologies".
CD single and 12-inch vinyl
#A. "All Apologies" – 3:50
#A. "Rape Me" – 2:49
#B. "Moist Vagina" - 3:34 (Previously Unreleased)
Cassette and 7-inch vinyl
#A. "All Apologies" – 3:50
#A. "Rape Me" – 2:49
Personnel
*
Kurt Cobain
Kurt Donald Cobain (February 20, 1967 – ) was an American musician. He was the lead vocalist, guitarist, primary songwriter, and a founding member of the grunge band Nirvana (band), Nirvana. Through his angsty songwriting and anti-establis ...
– vocals, guitar
*
Krist Novoselic
Krist Anthony Novoselic (; ; born May 16, 1965) is an American musician, politician and activist. Novoselic co-founded and played bass on every album for the rock music, rock band Nirvana (band), Nirvana.
Novoselic and Kurt Cobain formed the ban ...
– bass guitar
*
Dave Grohl – drums
Charts
Certifications
Other releases
*An acoustic demo of the song, recorded on a boombox in 1991 and featuring Cobain on vocals and acoustic guitar, appeared on the Nirvana box set, ''
With the Lights Out'', released in November 2004. The same version was re-released on the compilation album ''
Sliver: The Best of the Box'' in November 2005.
*A live version, recorded at the
Paramount Theatre in Seattle on October 31, 1991, appeared on the live video ''
Live at the Paramount'', released in September 2011. Cobain introduced the song as being about "hairy, sweaty, macho redneck men. Who rape."
*A brief audio clip of the song's
outro, from its performance at the
Seattle Center Coliseum in Seattle on September 11, 1992, featured in a collage of live footage in the live video, ''
Live! Tonight! Sold Out!!'', released in November 1994.
*A 2013 Albini remix of the studio version was released on the 20th anniversary "Deluxe" and "Super Deluxe" versions of ''In Utero'' in September 2013.
*A live version, from the band's MTV-recorded performance at
Pier 48 in Seattle on December 13, 1993, appeared on the ''
Live and Loud'' DVD, released in September 2013. "Rape Me" was among the songs on an edited version of the concert that first aired on MTV on December 31, 1993. The ''Live and Loud'' DVD also featured rehearsal footage of the song from the band's soundcheck.
*The version recorded for ''Nulle Part Ailleurs'' in Paris on February 4, 1994 appeared as bonus material on the ''Live and Loud'' DVD.
*The 30th anniversary "Super Deluxe" reissue of ''In Utero'', released in October 2023, featured two additional live versions of the song, from the band's concerts the
Great Western Forum
The Kia Forum, also known as Los Angeles Forum and formerly Great Western Forum, is a multi-purpose indoor arena in Inglewood, California, United States, adjacent to Los Angeles. Located on West Manchester Boulevard, with Laffit Pincay Jr., P ...
in
Inglewood, California
Inglewood is a city in southwestern Los Angeles County, California, United States, in the Greater Los Angeles, Greater Los Angeles metropolitan area. As of the 2020 United States census, 2020 U.S. census, the city had a population of 107,762. ...
on December 30, 1993, and at the
Seattle Center Arena in Seattle on January 7, 1994.
In popular culture
"Rape Me" was parodied by American animated sitcom ''
The Simpsons
''The Simpsons'' is an American animated sitcom created by Matt Groening and developed by Groening, James L. Brooks and Sam Simon for the Fox Broadcasting Company. It is a Satire (film and television), satirical depiction of American life ...
'' in the January 2008 episode, "
That '90s Show", which featured the song "Shave Me" being performed by Sadgasm, a grunge band fronted by lead character
Homer Simpson, in the early 1990s. It also featured "Shave Me" later being parodied by guest star
"Weird Al" Yankovic
Alfred Matthew "Weird Al" Yankovic ( ; born October 23, 1959) is an American comedy musician, writer, and actor. He is best known for writing and performing Comedy music, comedy songs that often Parody music, parody specific songs by contempo ...
as "Brain Freeze".
In the ''
South Park
''South Park'' is an American animated sitcom created by Trey Parker and Matt Stone, and developed by Brian Graden for Comedy Central. The series revolves around four boysStan Marsh, Kyle Broflovski, Eric Cartman, and Kenny McCormickand the ...
'' episode "
Hummels & Heroin",
Cartman,
Kenny
Kenny is a surname, a given name, and a diminutive of several different given names.
In Ireland, the surname is an Anglicisation of the Irish ''Ó Cionnaith'', also spelt ''Ó Cionnaoith'' and ''Ó Cionaodha'', meaning "descendant of Cionnaith". ...
,
Kyle, and
Butters perform a
Barbershop Quartet cover of "Rape Me" for a retirement home.
In October 2021, the American drama ''
Succession'' used "Rape Me" in the episode "
The Disruption" when Kendall ordered his assistants to play the song on the speakers to counter Shiv addressing the sexual assault allegations towards Waystar Royco. Love praised the show's use of the song in an
Instagram
Instagram is an American photo sharing, photo and Short-form content, short-form video sharing social networking service owned by Meta Platforms. It allows users to upload media that can be edited with Social media camera filter, filters, be ...
post, saying that she had "never been so proud of approving one of Kurt's songs" and that it was "as if they truly understood" the song's meaning.
Notes
References
* Azerrad, Michael. ''Come as You Are: The Story of Nirvana''. Doubleday, 1994. .
* Cross, Charles. ''Heavier Than Heaven''. Hyperion, 2001. .
* Gaar, Gillian G. ''In Utero''. Continuum, 2006. .
External links
{{Authority control
1993 songs
1993 singles
Nirvana (band) songs
Double A-side singles
Songs written by Kurt Cobain
Song recordings produced by Steve Albini
Songs about sexual assault
Obscenity controversies in music
DGC Records singles
it:All Apologies/Rape Me#Rape Me