
Coming out of the closet, often shortened to coming out, is a
metaphor
A metaphor is a figure of speech that, for rhetorical effect, directly refers to one thing by mentioning another. It may provide, or obscure, clarity or identify hidden similarities between two different ideas. Metaphors are usually meant to cr ...
used to describe
LGBTQ
LGBTQ people are individuals who are lesbian, Gay men, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, or questioning (sexuality and gender), questioning. Many variants of the initialism are used; LGBTQIA+ people incorporates intersex, Asexuality, asexual, ...
people's
self-disclosure
Self-disclosure is a process of communication by which one person reveals information about themselves to another. The information can be descriptive or evaluative, and can include thoughts, feelings, aspirations, goals, failures, successes, fears, ...
of their
sexual orientation
Sexual orientation is an enduring personal pattern of romantic attraction or sexual attraction (or a combination of these) to persons of the opposite sex or gender, the same sex or gender, or to both sexes or more than one gender. Patterns ar ...
,
romantic orientation
Romantic orientation, also called affectional orientation, is the classification of the sex or gender which a person experiences romantic attraction towards or is likely to have a romantic relationship with. The term is used alongside the t ...
, or
gender identity
Gender identity is the personal sense of one's own gender. Gender identity can correlate with a person's assigned sex or can differ from it. In most individuals, the various biological determinants of sex are congruent and consistent with the in ...
.
This is often framed and debated as a
privacy
Privacy (, ) is the ability of an individual or group to seclude themselves or information about themselves, and thereby express themselves selectively.
The domain of privacy partially overlaps with security, which can include the concepts of a ...
issue, because the consequences may be very different for different individuals, some of whom may have their
job security
Job security is the probability that an individual will keep their job; a job with a high level of security is such that a person with the job would have a small chance of losing it. Many factors threaten job security: globalization, outsourcing ...
or personal security threatened by such disclosure. The act may be viewed as a psychological process or journey;
decision-making
In psychology, decision-making (also spelled decision making and decisionmaking) is regarded as the Cognition, cognitive process resulting in the selection of a belief or a course of action among several possible alternative options. It could be ...
or
risk-taking
In simple terms, risk is the possibility of something bad happening. Risk involves uncertainty about the effects/implications of an activity with respect to something that humans value (such as health, well-being, wealth, property or the environ ...
; a strategy or plan; a mass or public event; a
speech act
In the philosophy of language and linguistics, a speech act is something expressed by an individual that not only presents information but performs an action as well. For example, the phrase "I would like the mashed potatoes; could you please pas ...
and a matter of
personal identity
Personal identity is the unique numerical identity of a person over time. Discussions regarding personal identity typically aim to determine the necessary and sufficient conditions under which a person at one time and a person at another time ...
; a
rite of passage
A rite of passage is a ceremony or ritual of the passage which occurs when an individual leaves one group to enter another. It involves a significant change of social status, status in society. In cultural anthropology the term is the Anglicisa ...
;
liberation
Liberation or liberate may refer to:
Film and television
* ''Liberation'' (film series), a 1970–1971 series about the Great Patriotic War
* "Liberation" (''The Flash''), a TV episode
* "Liberation" (''K-9''), an episode
Gaming
* '' Liberati ...
or
emancipation
Emancipation generally means to free a person from a previous restraint or legal disability. More broadly, it is also used for efforts to procure Economic, social and cultural rights, economic and social rights, civil and political rights, po ...
from
oppression
Oppression is malicious or unjust treatment of, or exercise of power over, a group of individuals, often in the form of governmental authority. Oppression may be overt or covert, depending on how it is practiced.
No universally accepted model ...
; an
ordeal; a means toward feeling
LGBT pride
In the context of LGBTQ culture, pride (also known as LGBTQ pride, LGBTQIA pride, LGBT pride, queer pride, gay pride, or gay and lesbian pride) is the promotion of the rights, self-affirmation, dignity, equality, and increased visibility o ...
instead of
shame
Shame is an unpleasant self-conscious emotion often associated with negative self-evaluation; motivation to quit; and feelings of pain, exposure, distrust, powerlessness, and worthlessness.
Definition
Shame is a discrete, basic emotion, d ...
and
social stigma
Stigma, originally referring to the visible marking of people considered inferior, has evolved to mean a negative perception or sense of disapproval that a society places on a group or individual based on certain characteristics such as their ...
; or a career-threatening act.
''Coming out of the closet'' is the source of other
gay slang
LGBTQ slang, LGBTQ speak, queer slang, or LGBTQIA slang is a set of English slang lexicon used predominantly among LGBTQ people. It has been used in various languages since the early 20th century as a means by which members of the LGBTQ communit ...
expressions related to voluntary disclosure or lack thereof. LGBTQ people who have already revealed or no longer conceal their sexual orientation or gender identity are ''out of the closet'' or simply ''out'', i.e., openly LGBTQ. By contrast, LGBTQ people who have yet to come out or have opted not to do so are labelled as
closeted
''Closeted'' and ''in the closet'' are metaphors for LGBTQ people who have not disclosed their sexual orientation or gender identity and aspects thereof, including sexual identity and sexual behavior. This metaphor is associated and sometime ...
or being in the closet.
Outing
Outing is the act of disclosing an LGBTQ person's sexual orientation or gender identity without their consent. It is often done for political reasons, either to instrumentalize homophobia, biphobia, and/or transphobia
Transphobia consists ...
is the deliberate or accidental disclosure of an LGBTQ person's sexual orientation or gender identity by someone else, without the first individual's consent. By extension, ''outing oneself'' is self-disclosure. ''Glass closet'' refers to the
open secret
An open secret is information that was originally intended to be confidential but has at some point been disclosed and is known to many people. Open secrets are ''secrets'' in the sense that they are excluded from formal or official discourse, b ...
of a public figure widely thought to be LGBTQ even though the person has not officially come out.
History
Between 1864 and 1869,
Karl Heinrich Ulrichs
Karl Heinrich Ulrichs (28 August 1825 – 14 July 1895) was a German lawyer, jurist, journalist, and writer. He is today regarded as a pioneer of sexology and the modern LGBT rights movement, gay rights movement. Ulrichs has been described as ...
wrote a series of pamphletsas well as giving a lecture to the Association of German Jurists in 1867advocating decriminalization of sex acts between men, in which he was candid about his own homosexuality. Historian
Robert Beachy
Robert Beachy (born in Aibonito, Puerto Rico) is associate professor of history at the Underwood International College at Yonsei University in Seoul, South Korea. He was raised in Mennonite communities in Puerto Rico and Indiana. He formerly ...
has said of him, "I think it is reasonable to describe
lrichsas the first gay person to publicly out himself."
In early 20th-century Germany, "coming out" was called "self-denunciation" and entailed serious legal and reputational risks.
In his 1906 work, (The sexual life of our time in its relation to modern civilization),
Iwan Bloch
Iwan Bloch (8 April 1872 – 21 November 1922), also known as Ivan Bloch, was a German dermatologist, and psychiatrist, psychoanalyst born in Delmenhorst, Grand Ducal Oldenburg, Germany, and often called the first sexologist.
Together with Mag ...
, a German-Jewish physician, entreated elderly homosexuals to self-disclose to their family members and acquaintances. In 1914,
Magnus Hirschfeld
Magnus Hirschfeld (14 May 1868 – 14 May 1935) was a German physician, Sexology, sexologist and LGBTQ advocate, whose German citizenship was later revoked by the Nazi government.David A. Gerstner, ''Routledge International Encyclopedia of Queer ...
revisited the topic in his major work ''The Homosexuality of Men and Women'', discussing the social and legal potential of several thousand homosexual men and women of rank, revealing their sexual orientation to the police in order to influence legislators and public opinion. Hirschfeld did not support 'self-denunciation' and dismissed the possibilities of a political movement based on open homosexuals.
[
The first prominent American to reveal his homosexuality was the poet Robert Duncan. In 1944, using his own name in the anarchist magazine '']Politics
Politics () is the set of activities that are associated with decision-making, making decisions in social group, groups, or other forms of power (social and political), power relations among individuals, such as the distribution of Social sta ...
'', he wrote that homosexuals were an oppressed minority. The decidedly clandestine Mattachine Society
The Mattachine Society (), founded in 1950, was an early national gay rights organization in the United States, preceded by several covert and open organizations, such as Chicago's Society for Human Rights. Communist and labor activist Harry Ha ...
, founded by Harry Hay
Henry Hay Jr. (April 7, 1912 – October 24, 2002) was an American gay rights activist, communist, and union organizer, labor advocate. He cofounded the Mattachine Society, the first sustained gay rights group in the United States, as well as th ...
and other veterans of the Wallace for President campaign in Los Angeles in 1950, moved into the public eye after Hal Call
Harold Leland "Hal" Call (September 20, 1917 – December 18, 2000) was an American businessperson, LGBT rights activist, and U.S. Army veteran. He served as president of the Mattachine Society. In the 1950s, he was one of the first gay activists ...
took over the group in San Francisco in 1953. Many gays emerged from the closet there.
In 1951, Donald Webster Cory
Edward Sagarin (September 18, 1913 – June 10, 1986), also known by his pen name Donald Webster Cory, was an American professor of sociology and criminology at the City University of New York, and a writer. His book ''The Homosexual in America: ...
published his landmark ''The Homosexual in America'', saying, "Society has handed me a mask to wear ... Everywhere I go, at all times and before all sections of society, I pretend." Cory was a pseudonym, but his frank and openly subjective descriptions served as a stimulus to the emerging homosexual self-awareness and the nascent homophile movement.
In the 1960s, Frank Kameny
Franklin Edward Kameny (May 21, 1925 – October 11, 2011) was an American gay rights activist. He has been referred to as "one of the most significant figures" in the American gay rights movement.
During the Lavender scare, in 1957, Kame ...
came to the forefront of the struggle. Having been fired from his job as an astronomer for the Army Map service in 1957 for homosexual behavior, because it was considered to make people vulnerable to blackmail pressure and endanger secure positions, Kameny refused to go quietly. He openly fought his dismissal, eventually appealing it to the US Supreme Court
The Supreme Court of the United States (SCOTUS) is the highest court in the federal judiciary of the United States. It has ultimate appellate jurisdiction over all Federal tribunals in the United States, U.S. federal court cases, and over Stat ...
. As a vocal leader of the growing movement, Kameny argued for unapologetic public actions. The cornerstone of his conviction was that, "we must instill in the homosexual community a sense of worth to the individual homosexual", which could only be achieved through campaigns openly led by homosexuals themselves.
With the spread of consciousness raising
Consciousness raising (also called awareness raising) is a form of activism popularized by United States feminists in the late 1960s. It often takes the form of a group of people attempting to focus the attention of a wider group on some cause or ...
(CR) in the late 1960s, coming out became a key strategy of the gay liberation
The gay liberation movement was a social and political movement of the late 1960s through the mid-1980s in the Western world, that urged lesbians and gay men to engage in radical direct action, and to counter societal shame with gay pride.Hoff ...
movement to raise political consciousness
Following the work of Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel, Karl Marx outlined the workings of a political consciousness.
The politics of consciousness
Consciousness typically refers to the idea of a being who is self-aware. It is a distinction often r ...
to counter heterosexism
Heterosexism is a system of attitudes, bias, and discrimination in favor of heterosexuality and heterosexual relationships. According to Elizabeth Cramer, it can include the belief that all people are or should be heterosexual and that hetero ...
and homophobia
Homophobia encompasses a range of negative attitudes and feelings toward homosexuality or people who identify or are perceived as being lesbian, Gay men, gay or bisexual. It has been defined as contempt, prejudice, aversion, hatred, or ant ...
. At the same time and continuing into the 1980s, gay and lesbian social support
Social support is the perception and actuality that one is cared for, has assistance available from other people, and, most popularly, that one is part of a supportive social network. These supportive resources can be emotional (e.g., nurturance), ...
discussion groups, some of which were called "coming-out groups", focused on sharing coming-out "stories" (accounts) with the goal of reducing isolation and increasing LGBTQ visibility and pride
Pride is a human Emotion, secondary emotion characterized by a sense of satisfaction with one's Identity (philosophy), identity, performance, or accomplishments. It is often considered the opposite of shame or of humility and, depending on conte ...
.
Etymology
The present-day expression "coming out" is understood to have originated in the early 20th century from an analogy
Analogy is a comparison or correspondence between two things (or two groups of things) because of a third element that they are considered to share.
In logic, it is an inference or an argument from one particular to another particular, as oppose ...
that likens homosexuals' introduction into gay subculture
Sexuality and gender identity-based cultures are subcultures and communities composed of people who have shared experiences, backgrounds, or interests due to common sexual or gender identities. Among the first to argue that members of sexual m ...
to a débutante
A debutante, also spelled débutante ( ; from , ), or deb is a young woman of aristocratic or upper-class family background who has reached maturity and is presented to society at a formal "debut" ( , ; ) or possibly debutante ball. Original ...
's ''coming-out party''. This is a celebration for a young upper-class
Upper class in modern societies is the social class composed of people who hold the highest social status. Usually, these are the wealthiest members of class society, and wield the greatest political power. According to this view, the upper cla ...
woman who is making her début – her formal presentation to society – because she has reached adult age or has become eligible for marriage. As historian George Chauncey
George Chauncey (born 1954) is a professor of history at Columbia University. He is best known as the author of ''Gay New York, Gay New York: Gender, Urban Culture, and the Making of the Gay Male World, 1890–1940.''
Academic career
Chauncey ...
points out:
Gay people in the pre-war years re-WWInbsp;... did not speak of ''coming out of'' what we call "the gay closet" but rather of ''coming out into'' what they called "homosexual society" or the "gay world", a world neither so small, nor so isolated, nor, often, so hidden as "closet" implies.
In fact, as Elizabeth Kennedy observes, "using the term 'closet' to refer to" previous times such as "the 1920s and 1930s might be anachronistic
An anachronism (from the Greek , 'against' and , 'time') is a chronological inconsistency in some arrangement, especially a juxtaposition of people, events, objects, language terms and customs from different time periods. The most common typ ...
".
An article on coming out in the online encyclopedia glbtq.com states that sexologist
Sexology is the scientific study of human sexuality, including human sexual interests, behaviors, and functions. The term ''sexology'' does not generally refer to the non-scientific study of sexuality, such as social criticism.
Sexologists app ...
Evelyn Hooker
Evelyn Hooker (; née Gentry, September 2, 1907 – November 18, 1996) was an American psychologist most notable for her 1956 paper "The Adjustment of the Male Overt Homosexual" in which she administered several psychological tests to groups of s ...
's observations introduced the use of "coming out" to the academic community in the 1950s. The article continues by echoing Chauncey's observation that a subsequent shift in connotation
A connotation is a commonly understood cultural or emotional association that any given word or phrase carries, in addition to its explicit or literal meaning, which is its denotation.
A connotation is frequently described as either positive or ...
occurred later on. The pre-1950s focus was on ''entrance'' into "a new world of hope and communal solidarity", whereas the post-Stonewall Riots
The Stonewall riots (also known as the Stonewall uprising, Stonewall rebellion, Stonewall revolution, or simply Stonewall) were a series of spontaneous riots and demonstrations against a police raid that took place in the early morning hours of ...
overtone was an ''exit'' from the oppression of the closet. This change in focus suggests that "coming out ''of the closet''" is a mixed metaphor that joins "coming out" with the closet
A closet (especially in North American English usage) is an enclosed space, with a door, used for storage, particularly that of clothes. ''Fitted closets'' are built into the walls of the house so that they take up no apparent space in the roo ...
metaphor: an evolution of "skeleton in the closet
Skeleton in the Closet or Skeleton in the Cupboard may refer to:
* Skeleton in the closet, a colloquial phrase and idiom used to describe an undisclosed fact
Literature
* ''Skeletons in the Closet'', 1982 novel by Elizabeth Linington
* ''A Skel ...
" specifically referring to living a life of denial and secrecy by concealing one's sexual orientation
Sexual orientation is an enduring personal pattern of romantic attraction or sexual attraction (or a combination of these) to persons of the opposite sex or gender, the same sex or gender, or to both sexes or more than one gender. Patterns ar ...
. The closet metaphor, in turn, is extended to the forces and pressures of heterosexist society and its institutions.
Identity issues
When coming out is described as a gradual process or a journey, it is meant to include becoming aware of and acknowledging one's gender identity, gender expression, or non-hetero-normative sexual orientation or attraction. This preliminary stage, which involves soul-searching or a personal epiphany
Epiphany may refer to:
Psychology
* Epiphany (feeling), an experience of sudden and striking insight
Religion
* Epiphany (holiday), a Christian holiday celebrating the revelation of God the Son as a human being in Jesus Christ
** Epiphany seaso ...
, is often called "coming out to oneself" and constitutes the start of self-acceptance
Self-acceptance is acceptance of self.
Definition
Self-acceptance can be defined as:
* the awareness of one's strengths and weaknesses,
* the realistic (yet subjective) appraisal of one's talents, capabilities, and general worth, and,
* feeling ...
. Many LGBTQ people say that this stage began for them during adolescence
Adolescence () is a transitional stage of human Developmental biology, physical and psychological Human development (biology), development that generally occurs during the period from puberty to adulthood (typically corresponding to the age o ...
or childhood
A child () is a human being between the stages of childbirth, birth and puberty, or between the Development of the human body, developmental period of infancy and puberty. The term may also refer to an unborn human being. In English-speaking ...
, when they first became aware of their sexual orientation toward members of the same sex.
Coming out has also been described as a process because of a recurring need or desire to come out in new situations in which LGBTQ people are assumed to be heterosexual or cisgender
The word ''cisgender'' (often shortened to ''cis''; sometimes ''cissexual'') describes a person whose gender identity corresponds to their sex assigned at birth, i.e., someone who is not ''transgender''. The prefix '' cis-'' is Latin and ...
, such as at a new job or with new acquaintances. A major frame of reference for those coming out has included using an inside/outside perspective, where some assume that the person can keep their identity or orientation a secret and separate from their outside appearance. This is not as simple as often thought, as Diana Fuss (1991) argues, "the problem of course with the inside/outside rhetoric ... is that such polemics disguise the fact that most of us are both inside and outside at the same time".
LGBTQ identity development
Every coming out story is the person trying to come to terms with who they are and their sexual orientation. Several models have been created to describe coming out as a process for gay and lesbian identity development, e.g., Dank, 1971; Cass, 1984; Coleman, 1989; Troiden, 1989. Of these models, the most widely accepted is the Cass identity model established by Vivienne Cass. This model outlines six discrete stages transited by individuals who successfully come out: identity confusion, identity comparison, identity tolerance, identity acceptance, identity pride, and identity synthesis. However, not every LGBTQ person follows such a model. For example, some LGBTQ youth become aware of and accept their same-sex desires or gender identity at puberty in a way similar to which heterosexual teens become aware of their sexuality, i.e., free of any notion of difference, stigma or shame in terms of the gender of the people to whom they are attracted. Regardless of whether LGBTQ youth develop their identity based on a model, the typical age at which youth in the United States come out has been dropping. High school students and even middle school students are coming out.[Coming Out Younger](_blank)
, Jezebel.com article.
Emerging research suggests that gay men
Gay men are male homosexuals. Some bisexual men, bisexual and homoromantic men may dually identify as ''gay'' and a number of gay men also identify as ''queer''. Historic terminology for gay men has included ''Sexual inversion (sexology), in ...
from religious backgrounds are likely to come out online via Facebook and other social networks, such as blogs, as they offer a protective interpersonal distance. This largely contradicts the growing movement in social media research indicating that online use, particularly Facebook, can lead to negative mental health outcomes such as increased levels of anxiety. While further research is needed to assess whether these results generalize to a larger sample, these recent findings open the door to the possibility that gay men's online experiences may differ from those of heterosexuals in that these may be more likely to provide mental health benefits rather than consequences.
Transgender identity and coming out
Transgender people vary greatly in choosing when, whether, and how to disclose their transgender status to family, close friends, and others. The prevalence of discrimination and violence against transgender people (in the United States, for example, transgender people are 28 percent more likely to be victims of violence) can make coming out a risky decision. Fear of retaliatory behavior, such as being removed from the parental home while underage, is a reason for transgender people to delay coming out to their families until they have reached adulthood. Parental confusion and lack of acceptance of a transgender child may result in parents treating a newly revealed gender identity as a "phase" or making efforts to change their children back to "normal" by using mental health services to alter the child's gender identity.
The internet can play a significant role in the coming out process for transgender people. Some come out in an online identity
Internet identity (IID), also online identity, online personality, online persona or internet persona, is a social identity that an Internet user establishes in online communities and websites. It may also be an actively constructed presentatio ...
first, providing an opportunity to go through experiences virtually and safely before risking social sanctions in the real world. But, while many trans people find support online that they may not have in real life, others encounter bullying and harassment. According to a study published by Blumenfeld and Cooper in 2012, youth who identify as LGBT are 22 percent less likely to report online bullying because they may have parents who do not believe or understand them, or they fear having to come out in order to explain the incident. This further shows the barriers that trans individuals can have when coming out.
Coming out as transgender can be more complex than coming out as a sexual minority. Visible changes that can occur as part of changing one's gender identitysuch as wardrobe changes, hormone replacement therapy
Hormone replacement therapy (HRT), also known as menopausal hormone therapy or postmenopausal hormone therapy, is a form of hormone therapy used to treat symptoms associated with female menopause. Effects of menopause can include symptoms such ...
, and name changescan make coming out to other people less of a choice. Further, elements that accompany a change in gender can have financial, physical, medical, and legal implications. Additionally, transgender individuals can experience prejudice and rejection from sexual minorities and others in the LGBTQ community, in addition to the larger LGBTQ bias they can face from mainstream culture, which can feel isolating.
Asexual and aromantic identity
Asexual
Asexual or Asexuals may refer to:
*Asexual reproduction
**Asexual reproduction in starfish
*Asexuality, the lack of sexual attraction to anyone or lack of interest in or desire for sexual activity.
**Gray asexuality, the spectrum between asexualit ...
and aromantic
Aromanticism is a romantic orientation characterized by experiencing little to no romantic attraction. The term "aromantic", Colloquialism, colloquially shortened to "aro", refers to a person whose romantic orientation is aromanticism.
It is d ...
people might experience different challenges when coming out that other individuals in the LGBTQ community may not face. The 2018 National LGBT Survey in the United Kingdom
The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, commonly known as the United Kingdom (UK) or Britain, is a country in Northwestern Europe, off the coast of European mainland, the continental mainland. It comprises England, Scotlan ...
found that only 17 percent of asexuals received positive responses when coming out, in comparison to over 40 percent for other LGBTQ people. A 2016 study found that asexual individuals commonly experienced skepticism and misunderstanding over the existence of their identity when coming out as asexual. A 2024 review by Michael Paramo
Michael Paramo is an American writer, academic, and artist known for founding the literary magazine Aze (magazine), ''Aze'' (formerly known as ''The Asexual'') and for their work examining interpersonal attraction and love with consideration to as ...
noted that asexual and aromantic people are commonly tasked with educating people about their identities when coming out because of a lack of understanding over their existence.
Asexual and aromantic people may face risks of sexual assault
Sexual assault is an act of sexual abuse in which one intentionally Physical intimacy, sexually touches another person without that person's consent, or Coercion, coerces or physically forces a person to engage in a sexual act against their w ...
, coercion, or other pressures to conform to sexual or romantic behavior from their sexual or romantic partners or external to their relationships. They can also experience being rejected by a partner or love interest for being asexual or aromantic, which may make some asexual and aromantic people tentative to come out. A 2023 study co-authored by Yasmin Benoit
Yasmin Benoit (born 10 June 1996) is an English lingerie and alternative model. She is also an Asexuality, asexual and Aromanticism, aromantic activist and researcher.
Early life
Benoit is of Trinidadian, Jamaican, and Barbadian descent. She at ...
found that asexual people in the UK were unlikely to reveal their identity within healthcare settings for fear of being pressured to conform to sexual behavior. Online role models may be helpful for asexual people when coming out because of a lack of representation surrounding asexuality.
Legal issues
In areas of the world where homosexual acts are penalized or prohibited, gay men, lesbians, and bisexual people can suffer negative legal consequences for coming out. In particular, where homosexuality is a crime, coming out may constitute self-incrimination
In criminal law, self-incrimination is the act of making a statement that exposes oneself to an accusation of criminal liability or prosecution. Self-incrimination can occur either directly or indirectly: directly, by means of interrogation where ...
. These laws still exist in 75 countries worldwide, including Egypt, Iran, and Afghanistan.
People who decide to come out as non-binary
Non-binary or genderqueer Gender identity, gender identities are those that are outside the male/female gender binary. Non-binary identities often fall under the transgender umbrella since non-binary people typically identify with a gende ...
or transgender often face more varied and different issues from a legal standpoint. Worldwide, legally changing your documented gender or name based on your identity is often prohibited or extremely difficult. A major negative effect of the inequality in regulations comes in the form of mental effects, as transgender people who have to legally announce a gender they do not identify with or their dead name
Deadnaming is the act of calling a transgender or non-binary person by their birth name after they have chosen a new name. Many transgender people change names as part of gender transition, and wish for their former name (''deadname'') to be ke ...
can face uncomfortable situations and stress.
Effects
In the early stages of the LGBTQ identity development process, people can feel confused and undergo turmoil. In 1993, Michelangelo Signorile
Michelangelo Signorile (; born December 19, 1960) is an American journalist, author and talk radio host. His radio program is aired each weekday across the United States and Canada on Sirius XM Radio and globally online. Signorile was editor ...
wrote ''Queer in America
Michelangelo Signorile (; born December 19, 1960) is an American journalist, author and talk radio host. His radio program is aired each weekday across the United States and Canada on Sirius XM Radio and globally online. Signorile was editor-at ...
'', in which he explored the harm caused both to a closeted person and to society in general by being closeted.
Because LGBTQ people have historically been marginalized as sexual minorities
Sexual and gender minorities (SGM) comprise individuals whose sexual identity, sexual orientation, sexual behavior, or gender identity differ from the majority of the surrounding society. Sexual minorities include lesbians, gay men, bisexual peo ...
, coming out of the closet remains a challenge for most of the world's LGBTQ population and can lead to a backlash
Backlash may refer to:
Literature
* '' Backlash: The Undeclared War Against American Women'', a 1991 book by Susan Faludi
* ''Backlash'' (Star Wars novel), a 2010 novel by Aaron Allston
* Backlash (Marc Slayton), a comic book character from ...
of heterosexist discrimination
Discrimination is the process of making unfair or prejudicial distinctions between people based on the groups, classes, or other categories to which they belong or are perceived to belong, such as race, gender, age, class, religion, or sex ...
and homophobic violence.
Studies have found that concealing sexual orientation is related to poorer mental health, physical health, and relationship functioning. For example, it has been found that same-sex couples who have not come out are not as satisfied in their relationships as same-sex couples who have. Findings from another study indicate that the fewer people who know about a lesbian's sexual orientation, the more anxiety, less positive affectivity, and lower self-esteem she has. Further, Gay.com states that closeted individuals are reported to be at increased risk for suicide
Suicide is the act of intentionally causing one's own death.
Risk factors for suicide include mental disorders, physical disorders, and substance abuse. Some suicides are impulsive acts driven by stress (such as from financial or ac ...
.
Depending on the relational bond between parents and children, a child coming out as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender can be positive or negative. Strong, loving relationships between children and their parents may be strengthened but if a relationship is already strained, those relationships may be further damaged or destroyed by the child coming out. If people coming out are accepted by their parents, it allows open discussions of dating and relationships and enables parents to help their children with coping with discrimination and to make healthier decisions regarding HIV/AIDS
The HIV, human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) is a retrovirus that attacks the immune system. Without treatment, it can lead to a spectrum of conditions including acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS). It is a Preventive healthcare, pr ...
and other sexually transmitted diseases
A sexually transmitted infection (STI), also referred to as a sexually transmitted disease (STD) and the older term venereal disease (VD), is an infection that is spread by sexual activity, especially vaginal intercourse, anal sex, oral ...
. Because parents, families, and close others can also reject someone coming out, the LGBTQ individual may not always enjoy positive effects from the decision. For example, teens who had parents who rejected them when they came out showed more drug use, depression, suicide attempts, and risky sexual behaviors later on as young adults. Some studies find that the health effects of coming out depend more on the reactions of parents than on the disclosure itself.
A number of studies have been done on the effect of people coming out to their parents. A 1989 report by Robinson et al. of parents of out gay and lesbian children in the United States found that 21 percent of fathers and 28 percent of mothers had suspected that their child was gay or lesbian, largely based on gender atypical behavior during childhood. The 1989 study found that two-thirds of parents reacted negatively. A 1995 study (that used young people's reactions) found that half of the mothers of gay or bisexual male college students "responded with disbelief, denial or negative comments", while fathers reacted slightly better. 18 percent of parents reacted "with acts of intolerance, attempts to convert the child to heterosexuality, and verbal threats to cut off financial or emotional support".
If rejected by their families, many LGBTQ youth can become homeless during the coming out process. LGBTQ youth are among the largest population of homeless youth; this has typically been caused by the reaction of others, especially parents, to self-identification and acknowledgment of being gay, or identifying with the LGBTQ community. About 20 to 30 percent of homeless youth identify as LGBTQ. Native and Indigenous LGBTQ youth make up the largest population to suffer homelessness: 44 percent, compared to any other race. 55 percent of homeless LGBTQ and 67 percent of homeless transgender youth were forced out of their homes by their parents or ran away because of their sexual orientation or gender identity and expression. Compared to transgender women and non-binary youth, transgender men have the highest percentage of housing instability. Homelessness among LGBTQ youth also affects many areas of an individual's life, leading to higher rates of victimization, depression, suicidal ideation, substance abuse, risky sexual behavior, and participation in more illegal and dangerous activities. A 2016 study on homelessness pathways among Latino LGBTQ youth found that homelessness among LGBTQ individuals can also be attributed to structural issues such as systems of care, and sociocultural and economic factors.
New data was collected by Amit Paley, the CEO and executive director of the Trevor Project, in regards to how the COVID-19 pandemic
The COVID-19 pandemic (also known as the coronavirus pandemic and COVID pandemic), caused by severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 (SARS-CoV-2), began with an disease outbreak, outbreak of COVID-19 in Wuhan, China, in December ...
affected LGBTQ youth. The 2021 National Survey on LGBTQ Youth Mental Health shows that COVID-19 had made 80 percent of the LGBTQ youth housing situation much more stressful due to economic struggles, initially affecting their ability to have safe and secure housing.
Jimmie Manning performed a study in 2015 on positive and negative behavior performed during the coming out conversation. During his study, he learned that almost all of his participants would attribute negative behaviors only to themselves during the coming out conversations, and positive behaviors to the recipient of the conversation. Manning suggests further research into this to figure out a way for positive behaviors to be seen and performed equally by both the recipient and the individual coming out.
In/out metaphors
Dichotomy
The closet narrative sets up an implicit dualism between being "in" or being "out", wherein those who are "in" are often stigmatized as living false, unhappy lives. Likewise, philosopher and critical analyst Judith Butler
Judith Pamela Butler (born February 24, 1956) is an American feminist philosopher and gender studies scholar whose work has influenced political philosophy, ethics, and the fields of third-wave feminism, queer theory, and literary theory.
In ...
(1991) states that the ''in/out'' metaphor creates a binary opposition which pretends that the closet is dark, marginal, and false, and that being out in the "light of illumination" reveals a true (or essential) identity. Nonetheless, Butler is willing to appear at events as a lesbian and maintains that "it is possible to argue that ... there remains a political imperative to use these necessary errors or category mistake
A category mistake (or category error, categorical mistake, or mistake of category) is a semantic or ontological error in which things belonging to a particular category are presented as if they belong to a different category, or, alternatively, ...
s ... to rally and represent an oppressed political constituency".
Criticisms
Diana Fuss
Diana Fuss is a professor of literature, film and feminist studies. She serves as Louis W. Fairchild Class of ‘24 Professor of English at Princeton University, New Jersey, United States.
Fuss earned her PhD in English and Semiotics from Brown Un ...
(1991) explains, "the problem of course with the inside/outside rhetoric ... is that such polemics disguise the fact that most of us are both inside and outside at the same time". Further, "To be out, in common gay parlance, is precisely to be no longer out; to be out is to be finally outside of exteriority and all the exclusions and deprivations such outsiderhood imposes. Or, put another way, to be out is really to be ininside the realm of the visible, the speakable, the culturally intelligible." In other words, coming out constructs the closet it supposedly destroys and the self it supposedly reveals, "the first appearance of the homosexual as a 'species' rather than a 'temporary aberration' also marks the moment of the homosexual's disappearanceinto the closet".
Furthermore, Seidman, Meeks, and Traschen (1999) argue that "the closet" may be becoming an antiquated metaphor in the lives of modern-day Americans for two reasons.
# Homosexuality is becoming increasingly normalized, and the shame and secrecy often associated with it appears to be in decline.
# The metaphor of the closet hinges upon the notion that stigma management
Stigma management is the process of concealing or disclosing aspects of one's identity to minimize social stigma.
When a person receives unfair treatment or alienation due to a social stigma, the effects can be detrimental. Social stigmas are de ...
is a way of life, yet stigma management may increasingly be done according to varied situations.
However, when understood as an act of self-disclosure, coming out (like any self-disclosure) cannot be accomplished once, and for all. Eve Sedgwick writes in ''Epistemology of the Closet'': the deadly elasticity of heterosexist presumption means that … people find new walls springing up around them even as they drowse: every encounter with a new classful of students, to say nothing of a new boss, social worker, loan officer, landlord, doctor, erects new closets whose fraught and characteristic laws of optics and physics exact from at least gay people new surveys, new calculations, new draughts and requisitions of secrecy or disclosure.
As Tony Adams demonstrates in ''Narrating the Closet'', meeting new people makes for a new time to disclose one's sexuality.
National Coming Out Day
Observed annually on 11 October, by members of the LGBT communities and their allies
An alliance is a relationship among people, groups, or states that have joined together for mutual benefit or to achieve some common purpose, whether or not an explicit agreement has been worked out among them. Members of an alliance are calle ...
, National Coming Out Day is an international civil awareness
In philosophy and psychology, awareness is the perception or knowledge of something. The concept is often synonymous with consciousness. However, one can be aware of something without being explicitly conscious of it, such as in the case of bli ...
day for coming out and discussing LGBTQ issues among the general populace in an effort to give a familiar face to the LGBT rights movement
Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (LGBTQ) movements are social movements that advocate for LGBTQ people in society.
Although there is not a primary or an overarching central organization that represents all LGBTQ people and their ...
. This day inspired the United States government to recognize October as LGBT History Month
LGBTQ History Month is an annual month-long observance of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer history, and the history of the gay rights and related civil rights movements. It was founded in 1994 by Missouri high-school history teacher ...
.
The day was founded in 1988, by Robert Eichberg, his partner William Gamble, and Jean O'Leary
Jean O'Leary (March 4, 1948 – June 4, 2005) was an American lesbian and gay rights activist. She was the founder of Lesbian Feminist Liberation, one of the first lesbian activist groups in the women's movement, and an early member and co-di ...
to celebrate the Second National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights
The Second National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights was a large Demonstration (people), political rally that took place in Washington, D.C., on October 11, 1987. Around 750,000 people participated. Its success, size, scope, and hist ...
one year earlier, in which 500,000 people marched on Washington, DC
Washington, D.C., formally the District of Columbia and commonly known as Washington or D.C., is the capital city and Federal district of the United States, federal district of the United States. The city is on the Potomac River, across from ...
, to promote gay and lesbian equality.
In the United States, the Human Rights Campaign
The Human Rights Campaign (HRC) is an American LGBTQ advocacy group. It is the largest LGBTQ political lobbying organization within the United States. Based in Washington, D.C., the organization focuses on protecting and expanding rights for L ...
manages the event under the National Coming Out Project, offering resources to LGBTQ individuals, couples, parents, and children, as well as straight friends and relatives, to promote awareness of LGBT families living honest and open lives. Candace Gingrich
Candace Gingrich (; born June 2, 1966) is an American LGBT rights activist at the Human Rights Campaign. Candace is the half-sibling of former Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich.Seelye, KatharineSpeaker's Sister Now Speaking Out ''The New York Ti ...
became the spokesperson for the day in April 1995. Although still named "''National'' Coming Out Day", this day is observed in Canada, Germany, the Netherlands, and Switzerland also on 11 October, and in the United Kingdom
The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, commonly known as the United Kingdom (UK) or Britain, is a country in Northwestern Europe, off the coast of European mainland, the continental mainland. It comprises England, Scotlan ...
on 12 October. To celebrate National Coming Out Day on 11 October 2002, Human Rights Campaign released an album bearing the same title as that year's theme: ''Being Out Rocks
The Human Rights Campaign (HRC) is an American LGBTQ advocacy group. It is the largest LGBTQ political lobbying organization within the United States. Based in Washington, D.C., the organization focuses on protecting and expanding rights for LG ...
''. Participating artists include Kevin Aviance
Kevin Aviance (born Eric Snead on June 22, 1968) is an American drag queen, club/dance musician, fashion designer, and nightclub personality. He is a personality in New York City's gay scene and has performed throughout North America, Europe and ...
, Janis Ian
Janis Ian (born Janis Eddy Fink; April 7, 1951) is an American singer-songwriter who was most commercially successful in the 1960s and 1970s. Her signature songs are the 1966/67 hit "Society's Child, Society's Child (Baby I've Been Thinking)" an ...
, k.d. lang
Kathryn Dawn Lang (born November 2, 1961), known by her stage name k.d. lang (stylised in all lowercase), is a Canadian pop and country singer-songwriter and occasional actress. Lang has won Juno Awards and Grammy Awards for her musical pe ...
, Cyndi Lauper
Cynthia Ann Stephanie Lauper ( ; born June 22, 1953) is an American singer, songwriter and actress. Known for her distinctive image, featuring a variety of hair colors and eccentric clothing, and for her powerful four-octave vocal range;Jerome, ...
, Sarah McLachlan
Sarah Ann McLachlan (born January 28, 1968) is a Canadian singer-songwriter. As of 2015, she had sold over 40 million albums worldwide. McLachlan's best-selling album to date is ''Surfacing (album), Surfacing'' (1997), for which she won two G ...
, and Rufus Wainwright
Rufus McGarrigle Wainwright (born July 22, 1973) is a Canadian and American singer, songwriter, and composer. He has recorded eleven studio albums and numerous tracks on compilations and film soundtracks. He has also written two classical opera ...
.
Media
Highly publicized comings-out
Government officials and political candidates
*In 1983, US House representative Gerry Studds
Gerry Eastman Studds ( ; May 12, 1937 – October 14, 2006) was an American Democratic Congressman from Massachusetts who served from 1973 until 1997. He was the first member of Congress to be openly gay. In 1983 he was censured by the ...
came out as a homosexual during the 1983 congressional page sex scandal
The 1983 congressional page sex scandal was a political scandal involving members of the United States House of Representatives.
Reprimand recommendation
On July 14, 1983, the House Ethics Committee recommended that Rep. Dan Crane ( R- IL) and R ...
.
*In 1987, Barney Frank
Barnett Frank (born March 31, 1940) is a retired American politician. He served as a member of the U.S. House of Representatives from Massachusetts from 1981 to 2013. A Democratic Party (United States), Democrat, Frank served as chairman of th ...
, a United States House representative, publicly came out as gay, the second member of the Massachusetts
Massachusetts ( ; ), officially the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, is a U.S. state, state in the New England region of the Northeastern United States. It borders the Atlantic Ocean and the Gulf of Maine to its east, Connecticut and Rhode ...
delegation to the United States Congress
The United States Congress is the legislature, legislative branch of the federal government of the United States. It is a Bicameralism, bicameral legislature, including a Lower house, lower body, the United States House of Representatives, ...
to do so.
*In 1988, Svend Robinson
Svend Robinson (born March 4, 1952) is a Canadian politician. He was a member of Parliament (MP) from 1979 to 2004, representing suburban Vancouver-area constituencies in the city of Burnaby for the New Democratic Party (NDP). He was the first ...
was the first member of House of Commons of Canada
The House of Commons of Canada () is the lower house of the Parliament of Canada. Together with the Monarchy of Canada#Parliament (King-in-Parliament), Crown and the Senate of Canada, they comprise the Bicameralism, bicameral legislature of Ca ...
to come out.
*In 1999, Australian senator Brian Greig
Brian Andrew Greig OAM (born 22 February 1966) is a former Australian politician. Grieg was an Australian Democrats member of the Australian Senate from 1999 to 2005, representing the state of Western Australia.
Early life
Greig was born in F ...
came out as being gay in his maiden speech
A maiden speech is the first speech given by a newly elected or appointed member of a legislature or parliament.
Traditions surrounding maiden speeches vary from country to country. In many Westminster system governments, there is a convention th ...
to parliament, the first politician to do so in that country.
*In 2004, New Jersey governor
The governor of New Jersey is the head of government of the U.S. state of New Jersey. The office of governor is an elected position with a four-year term. There is a two consecutive term limit, with no limitation on non-consecutive terms. The ...
Jim McGreevey
James Edward McGreevey (born August 6, 1957) is an American politician of the Democratic Party who served as the 52nd governor of New Jersey from 2002 until his resignation in 2004 amidst a sex scandal.
McGreevey served in the New Jersey Genera ...
announced his decision to resign and publicly came out as "a gay American". He acknowledged having had an extramarital affair
An affair is a relationship typically between two people, one or both of whom are either married or in a long-term monogamous or emotionally-exclusive relationship with someone else. The affair can be solely sexual, solely physical or solely em ...
with a man, Golan Cipel, an Israeli citizen and veteran of the Israeli Defense Forces
Israeli may refer to:
* Something of, from, or related to the State of Israel
* Israelis, citizens or permanent residents of the State of Israel
* Modern Hebrew, a language
* ''Israeli'' (newspaper), published from 2006 to 2008
* Guni Israeli (b ...
. As McGreevey had appointed him as the New Jersey homeland security
Homeland security is an American national security term for "the national effort to ensure a homeland that is safe, secure, and resilient against terrorism and other hazards where American interests, aspirations, and ways of life can thrive" to ...
adviser, he had created a conflict of interest with the affair.
Athletes
The first US professional team-sport athlete to come out was David Kopay
David Marquette Kopay (born June 28, 1942) is an American former professional football player who was a running back in the National Football League (NFL). He played college football for the Washington Huskies. In 1975, he became one of the fir ...
, a former NFL
The National Football League (NFL) is a professional American football league in the United States. Composed of 32 teams, it is divided equally between the American Football Conference (AFC) and the National Football Conference (NFC). The N ...
running back
A running back (RB) is a member of the offensive backfield in gridiron football. The primary roles of a running back are to receive American football plays#Offensive terminology, handoffs from the quarterback to Rush (American football)#Offense ...
who had played for five teams (San Francisco
San Francisco, officially the City and County of San Francisco, is a commercial, Financial District, San Francisco, financial, and Culture of San Francisco, cultural center of Northern California. With a population of 827,526 residents as of ...
, Detroit
Detroit ( , ) is the List of municipalities in Michigan, most populous city in the U.S. state of Michigan. It is situated on the bank of the Detroit River across from Windsor, Ontario. It had a population of 639,111 at the 2020 United State ...
, Washington
Washington most commonly refers to:
* George Washington (1732–1799), the first president of the United States
* Washington (state), a state in the Pacific Northwest of the United States
* Washington, D.C., the capital of the United States
** A ...
, New Orleans
New Orleans (commonly known as NOLA or The Big Easy among other nicknames) is a Consolidated city-county, consolidated city-parish located along the Mississippi River in the U.S. state of Louisiana. With a population of 383,997 at the 2020 ...
and Green Bay) between 1964 and 1972. He came out in 1975 in an interview in the ''Washington Star
''The Washington Star'', previously known as the ''Washington Star-News'' and the ''Washington'' ''Evening Star'', was a daily afternoon newspaper published in Washington, D.C., between 1852 and 1981. The Sunday edition was known as the ''Sunday ...
''.
The first professional athlete to come out while still playing was Czech-American tennis player Martina Navratilova
Martina Navratilova (, ; ; born October18, 1956) is a Czech-American former professional tennis player. She was ranked as the world No. 1 in women's List of WTA number 1 ranked singles tennis players, singles for 332 weeks (List of WTA number ...
, who came out as a lesbian during an interview with ''The New York Times
''The New York Times'' (''NYT'') is an American daily newspaper based in New York City. ''The New York Times'' covers domestic, national, and international news, and publishes opinion pieces, investigative reports, and reviews. As one of ...
'' in 1981. English footballer Justin Fashanu
Justinus Soni "Justin" Fashanu ( ; 19 February 1961 – 2 May 1998) was an English footballer who played for a variety of clubs between 1978 and 1997. He was known by his early clubs to be gay, and came out publicly later in his career, becoming ...
came out in 1990 and was subject to homophobic taunts from spectators, opponents and teammates for the rest of his career.
In 1995 while at the peak of his playing career, Ian Roberts became the first high-profile Australian sports person and first rugby footballer in the world to come out as gay. John Amaechi
John Uzoma Ekwugha Amaechi , OBE (; born 26 November 1970) is an English psychologist, consultant and former professional basketball player. He played college basketball for the Vanderbilt Commodores and Penn State Nittany Lions, and profess ...
, who played in the NBA
The National Basketball Association (NBA) is a professional basketball league in North America composed of 30 teams (29 in the United States and 1 in Canada). The NBA is one of the major professional sports leagues in the United States and Ca ...
with the Utah Jazz
The Utah Jazz are an American professional basketball team based in Salt Lake City. The Jazz compete in the National Basketball Association (NBA) as a member of the Northwest Division of the Western Conference. Since the 1991–92 season, the ...
, Orlando Magic and Cleveland Cavaliers (as well as internationally with Panathinaikos BC of the ESAKE A1 Ethniki, Greek Basketball League and Virtus Bologna, Kinder Bologna of the Lega Basket Serie A, Italian Basketball League), came out in February 2007 on ESPN's ''Outside the Lines'' program. He also wrote a memoir, ''Man in the Middle'', published by ESPN Books, which explores his professional and personal life as a closeted basketball player. He was the first NBA player (former or current) to come out.
In 2008, Australian diver Matthew Mitcham became the first openly gay athlete to win an Olympic gold medal. He achieved this at the 2008 Summer Olympics, Beijing Olympics in the men's 10-meter platform event.
The first Irish county Gaelic Athletic Association, GAA player to come out while still playing was hurling, hurler Dónal Óg Cusack in October 2009, in previews of his autobiography. Gareth Thomas (rugby, born 1974), Gareth Thomas, who played international rugby union and rugby league for Wales, came out in a ''Daily Mail'' interview in December 2009 near the end of his career.
In 2013, American basketball player Jason Collins (a member of the Washington Wizards) came out as gay, becoming the first active male professional athlete in a Major professional sports leagues in the United States and Canada, major North American team sport to publicly come out as gay.
On 15 August 2013, WWE wrestler Darren Young (wrestler), Darren Young came out, making him the first openly gay active professional wrestler.
On 9 February 2014, former Missouri defensive lineman Michael Sam came out as gay. He was drafted by the St. Louis Rams on 10 May 2014, with the 249th overall pick in the seventh round, making him the first openly gay player to be drafted by an NFL franchise. He was released by St. Louis and waived by the Dallas Cowboys practice squad. Sam was on the roster for the Montreal Alouettes, but has since retired from football.
On 21 June 2021, Las Vegas Raiders defensive end Carl Nassib announced on his Instagram account that he is gay, becoming the first active NFL player to come out publicly.
In October 2021, professional soccer player Josh Cavallo came out as gay via videos posted to his team's social media accounts, becoming the only openly gay top-level professional soccer player in the world.
In May 2022, Blackpool F.C. Forward (association football), forward Jake Daniels came out as gay, becoming the first active male British footballer to do so since Justin Fashanu in 1990.
In February 2023, Czech footballer Jakub Jankto, then a AC Sparta Prague midfielder on loan from Spanish side Getafe CF announced he was gay on Twitter, becoming the first male footballer to come out while an active international player.
Artists and entertainers
In 1997 on ''The Oprah Winfrey Show'', American comedian Ellen DeGeneres came out as a lesbian. Her real-life coming out was echoed in the sitcom ''Ellen (TV series), Ellen'' in "The Puppy Episode", in which her character Ellen (TV series), Ellen Morgan outs herself over the airport public address system.
On 29 March 2010, Puerto Rican singer Ricky Martin came out publicly in a post on his official web site, stating, "I am proud to say that I am a fortunate homosexual man. I am very blessed to be who I am." Martin said that "these years in silence and reflection made me stronger and reminded me that acceptance has to come from within and that this kind of truth gives me the power to conquer emotions I didn't even know existed." Singer Adam Lambert came out after pictures of him kissing another man were publicly circulated while he was a participant on the American Idol (season 8), eighth season of ''American Idol''. In January 2013, while accepting the honorary Golden Globe Cecil B. DeMille Award, American actress and director Jodie Foster made the first public acknowledgment of her sexual orientation, saying; "I already did my coming out a thousand years ago, in the Stone Age, in those very quaint days when a fragile young girl would open up to friends and family and co-workers then gradually to everyone that knew her, everyone she actually met."
Military personnel
In 1975, Leonard Matlovich, while serving in the United States Air Force, came out to challenge the US military's policies banning service by homosexuals. Widespread coverage included a ''Time (magazine), Time'' magazine cover story and a television movie on NBC.
In 2011, as the US prepared to lift restrictions on service by openly gay people, Senior Airman Randy Phillips (airman), Randy Phillips conducted a social media campaign to garner support for coming out. The video he posted on YouTube of the conversation in which he told his father he was gay went Viral video, viral. In one journalist's summation, he "masterfully used social media and good timing to place himself at the centre of a civil rights success story".
Pastors
In October 2010, megachurch pastor Bishop Jim Swilley came out to his congregation. The YouTube video of the service went Viral video, viral. Interviews with ''People (magazine), People'' magazine, Joy Behar, Don Lemon ABC News (United States), ABC News and NPR focused on bullycides which Bishop Swilley said had prompted him to "come out". One year later, he confirmed the costs but also the freedom he has experienced. "To be able to have freedom is something that I wouldn't trade anything for." "Being married as yourself, preaching as yourself and living your life as yourself is infinitely better than doing those things as someone else."
Bishop Swilley's son, Jared Swilley, bass player and front man of Black Lips, said, "It was definitely shocking, but I was actually glad when he told me. I feel closer to him now". Bishop Swilley's second son, Judah Swilley, a cast member on the Oxygen (TV channel), Oxygen show ''Preachers of Atlanta'', is confronting homophobia in the church.
Journalists
In August 2019, Nicky Bandini, a sportswriter and broadcaster contributing at ''The Guardian'' and ESPN came out as transgender, saying that she had previously written under the name Paolo Bandini. She posted a Twitter video and published an opinion piece in ''The Guardian'', saying that it took her several years to come out as transgender. Bandini said she had dealt with gender dysphoria for three-and-a-half decades before finally admitting her status as a trans woman to the world.
Depictions of coming out
In 1987, a two-part episode of the Quebec television series ''Avec un grand A'', "Lise, Pierre et Marcel", depicted a married closeted man who has to come out when his wife discovers that he has been having an affair with another man. In 1996, the acclaimed British film ''Beautiful Thing (film), Beautiful Thing'' had a positive take in its depiction of two teenage boys coming to terms with their sexual identity.
Author Rodger Streitmatter described Ellen DeGeneres's coming out in the media as well as a 1997 episode of ''Ellen (TV series), Ellen'', "The Puppy Episode", as "rank[ing], hands down, as the single most public exit in gay history", changing media portrayals of lesbians in Western culture. In 1999, Russell T Davies's Queer as Folk (UK TV series), ''Queer as Folk'', a popular TV series shown on the UK's Channel 4, debuted and focused primarily on the lives of young gay men; in particular on a 15-year-old going through the process of revealing his sexuality to those around him. This storyline was also featured prominently in the US version of ''Queer as Folk'', which debuted in 2000.
The television show ''The L Word'', which debuted in 2004, focuses on the lives of a group of lesbian and bisexual women. The theme of coming out is prominently featured in the storylines of multiple characters.
In the Emmy Award-nominated episode "Gay Witch Hunt" of ''The Office (American TV series), The Office'', Michael inadvertently outs Oscar to the whole office.
''Coming Out Serie, Coming Out'', which debuted in 2013, is the first Quebec television program about being gay.
Amazon's 2014 series ''Transparent (TV series), Transparent'' features a trans woman who comes out to her adult children at the age of 75, and follows her social transition process. The show highlights various reactions from the woman's social circle to her coming out, as well as the many adjustments in language and gender expression that she uses to make her transition. Main character Maura is played by Jeffrey Tambor; the show was criticized by some for casting a cisgender man as a transgender woman.
The third season of the Norwegian teen drama series ''Skam (TV series), Skam'', released in 2015, focused on a main character coming out and his relationship with another boy.
The film ''Love, Simon'', based on the book ''Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda'', debuted in 2018. It is the first major studio film about a gay teenager coming out.
In 2020, a second adaption, called ''Love, Victor'', began airing on Hulu. The TV series refers to both the ''Love, Simon'' film and the ''Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda'' book. The series premiered its third season in 2022. The series continued and expanded its original story with another young and closeted student.
Extended use in LGBTQ media, publishing and activism
"Out" is a common word or prefix used in the titles of LGBTQ-themed books, films, periodicals, organizations, and TV programs. Some high-profile examples are Out (magazine), ''Out'' magazine, the defunct ''OutWeek'', and OutTV (Canada), OutTV.
Non-LGBTQ contexts
In political, casual, or even humorous contexts, ''coming out'' means by extension the self-disclosure of a person's secret behaviors, beliefs, affiliations, tastes, identities, and interests that may cause astonishment or bring shame
Shame is an unpleasant self-conscious emotion often associated with negative self-evaluation; motivation to quit; and feelings of pain, exposure, distrust, powerlessness, and worthlessness.
Definition
Shame is a discrete, basic emotion, d ...
. Some examples include: "coming out as an alcoholic", "Coming out (BDSM), coming out as a BDSM participant", "coming out of the broom closet" (as a witchcraft, witch), "coming out as a conservative", "coming out as disabled", "coming out as a liberal", "coming out as intersex", "coming out as Dissociative identity disorder, multiple", "coming out as polyamory, polyamorous", "coming out as a sex worker", and "coming out of the shadows" as an Illegal immigrant population of the United States, undocumented immigrant within the United States. The term is also used by members of online body integrity dysphoria communities to refer to the process of telling friends and families about their condition.
With its associated metaphors, the figure of speech has also been extended to atheism, e.g., "coming out as an atheist". A public awareness initiative for freethought and atheism, entitled the "Out Campaign", makes ample use of the "out" metaphor. This campaign was initiated by Robin Elisabeth Cornwell, and is endorsed by prominent atheist Richard Dawkins, who states "there is a big closet population of atheists who need to 'come out.
Impact of COVID-19 pandemic
During the COVID-19 pandemic
The COVID-19 pandemic (also known as the coronavirus pandemic and COVID pandemic), caused by severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 (SARS-CoV-2), began with an disease outbreak, outbreak of COVID-19 in Wuhan, China, in December ...
, the order of people to whom LGBTQ+ children revealed their identity was impacted. Traditionally, children confide in friends before going to their families, but this order has been reversed. It is emphasized that even in these cases, children only tell their families first if they are accepting.
The shift in global circumstances during the pandemic has played a role in the coming out experience for a great number of LGBTQ+ people. Many were forced to be in unaccepting environments during this time. American LGBTQ+ people faced a higher risk for negative consequences from the pandemic than their straight counterparts. A lower percentage of these individuals have health coverage, a higher percentage smoke, and a higher percentage maintain employment in vulnerable industries. All of these factors contribute to worse consequences for this population during the pandemic.
The LGBTQ+ community saw increased feelings of isolation during this time, impacting their coming out experiences. Many individuals described how they lacked an avenue in which to connect with the LGBT community, reducing their ability to gain confidence in their identity. Researchers argue that this is seriously detrimental to an already isolated community.[ However, the ample time for reflection proved beneficial for some individuals regarding their self-image and discovery. Some people were able to come to terms with their identity and increase their confidence as a result. Others felt like the increase in the community's online presence has allowed for more interaction with the community than before.
The lack of in-person celebrations during Pride Month, which is typically held in June, affected the connectedness of the community. These circumstances affecting this important time for the community have reduced the confidence in which LGBTQ+ people feel comfortable sharing their identities. These face-to-face events are argued to be community-building events. Researchers argue that a crucial aspect of their support system has vanished without them.
These unprecedented global circumstances may have caused individuals to potentially postpone their coming out, influencing their unique stories. It describes how the pandemic has forced many LGBTQ+ youth to remain in non-accepting households. This, they argue, may also delay their coming out process as well. Mental health may also have been affected as a result of being stuck in these environments. LGBTQ+ adults faced unique challenges compared to their youth counterparts. Significant job loss compared to non-LGBTQ+ counterparts occurred, affecting their economic vitality, whereas much of the youth population was forced to remain at home.
There are several instances of the openness of the LGBTQ+ identity being a disadvantage in the pandemic setting among various countries. In the Philippines, a lesbian couple did not receive food aid during the pandemic because they did not fit the traditional definition of a family. In this instance, the disclosure of their identity did not prove to be in their best interests. The country also resorted to public humiliation when dealing with three gay men who broke the curfew rules.
In terms of gender minorities, several disruptions occurred within the medical environment hindering Gender-affirming surgery, gender-affirming procedures. Many interruptions occurred with in-person appointments as well. Economic disparities have also played a role in the transgender experience.]
See also
* Biphobia
* Down-low (sexual slang)
* Ego-dystonic sexual orientation
* Intersex and LGBT
* Labeling theory
* Liberal homophobia
* Questioning (sexuality and gender)
* Terminology of homosexuality
References
Further reading
* Argent, Jay (2017) ''Coming Out: High School Boys Share Their Stories''. [Charleston]: CreateSpace Independent Publishing.
* Beasley, Neil (2016) ''Football's Coming Out: Life as a Gay Fan and Player''. [London]: Floodlit Dreams Ltd.
* Berube, Allan (2010) ''Coming Out under Fire: The History of Gay Men and Women in World War Two'' (2nd ed.). Chapel Hill: University of North Carolina Press.
* Blaschke, Ronny (2008) ''Versteckspieler: Die Geschichte des schwulen Fußballers Marcus Urban''. Göttingen: Verlag Die Werkstatt.
* Dossie Easton, Janet Hardy, Catherine A. Liszt, ''When Someone You Love Is Kinky''. Greenery Press, 2000. .
* Kinsella, Vinne (2016) ''Fashionably Late: Gay, Bi, and Trans Men Who Came Out Later in Life''. Portland: Eldredge Books
* LaSala, Michael (2010) ''Coming Out, Coming Home: Helping Families Adjust to a Gay or Lesbian Child''. New York: Columbia University Press.
*
* Robbie Rogers, Rogers, Robbie; Marcus, Eric (2014) ''Coming Out to Play''. London: The Robson Press.
* Seidman, Steven. ''Beyond the Closet: The Transformation of Gay and Lesbian Life''. Routledge, 2003. .
* Stramel, James. ''Gay Virtue: The Ethics of Disclosure''. Dissertation, University of Southern California, 1996.
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LGBTQ terminology
Metaphors
LGBTQ and society
Secrecy